Women Problems

D

Dark Orchid

New Metal Member
Aug 12, 2003
5
0
1
39
Northern Ireland
www.dorchadas.cjb.net
:erk:

I am having women problems, and I need help, and this is the cheesyest way to do it.

Right, i have been with this girl for about two years on and off and it got serious bout 6 months ago.......blah....blah.....blah

She was raped as a child by her brother, and she is anorexic/belllimic.

I am just your average run of the mill fucked up child with no direction in life only drugs and music.

SHe is beautifulll and really nice to talk to, we have great sex but lately she told me that she was a lesbian but she stillllll wanted a sexual relationship with me, (I know, its fucked up). We have the most fucked up relationship in the world, lllots of fighting, lotsa of bllood , both ways, and yet lots of great times.

The one thing i want though in our relationship is commitment, and she aint givin me that, she went out lllllast sat. to a female friends house and they got sexual.

I am realllly fucked off and i dunno what to do. I just thought someone on this forum willl give me advice coz the amjority of u's are good people. I llove the girlll and i dont wanna loose her, but i want commitment.
 
If she's not sure of what she wants, how can you force a commitment?
And, obvioulsy she's not stable with her past problems and current. She's anorexic/belllimic????
First thing to do is get her help she's not in a healthy situation, this is life and death.
That should be priority, not whether you want a commitment.
 
Sit her down and have a good talk with her, as well. Don't let anything bottle up inside. Let everything come natural. And good luck.
 
Calm down... No time for an emotional over-reaction, especially because of the situation this girl is in.

For me it doesn´t really look like you have a relationship at all. Seems to me that it is dominated only by extreme emotions. The ultimate sex on the one hand and other the hand lots of fights. Isn´t it this way? Not good for both of you.

The most important thing for her is getting some stability. As you can see, she isn´t even sure about her sexual orientation. She needs a therapy not a relationship...

She wants to be nice to you, but somehow she can´t...

The only advice I can give to you, is that you calm down... and try to calm down her as well. Get some distance between you, so you can think about the situation in a more rational way and if she isn´t able to do this as well, then she isn´t also able to have an adequate relationship with you.

Good luck
 
When it comes to such personal problems it seems strange to look for advice from strangers. How can we ever know enough about you or your situation to offer help?
 
damn...sounds like you're describing a stage in my life man...!

anyway...ALL is up to you man...

always remember CLEARLY:

1. YOU ARE ALWAYS FIRST-you came alone, you leave alone.

2. you must never DEPEND on any other person to live on.

3. you must have the strength and focus to think and decide WHAT IS BEST AND GOOD FOR YOU; before anyone else.

4. EVERY DECISION YOU TAKE, must be considered the CORRECT one.

5. a relationship that is good for you must NEVER cause PAIN. - there will be fights, disagreements, but NEVER pain and sorrow. a good relationship seeks enlightenment, trust and understanding for BOTH PARTS.

6. NEVER EXPECT ANYTHING FROM ANYONE. LIFE decides if u deserve something from someone, not you :)

7. LIVE with caution, but NEVER close your mind, heart.


---> so, think about all these points when thinking about your girl:

do you REALLY want to stay with her?
have u ever asked her what does she want with you?
what do you want with her?
do you really know her?
does she really know you?


we, humans, are so unpredictable...

sometimes a person only wants to feel loved.
sometimes a person only wants to have some attention.
sometimes a person just needs someone to tell about her problems...

a good friend of mine told me that strong relationships bring strong emotional chaos...but this is when you really feel alive


i know,
maybe this post will not be useful enough
but it is up to you man-


and whatever you decide...
IF IT BRINGS YOU PAIN IN THE FUTURE,
DO NOT REGRET OF WHAT YOU DID.
IT WAS YOUR DECISION.
 
i think that you should have time apart, as from what your saying it looks like she only wants you for sex. Sometimes even though it could be the hardest thing for you to do, sometimes you just gotta let go, although it aint that easy......You can hold in there talk to her, find out what she wants and if its what u want too then you can both work on it.........but from what i see she isnt thinking about your feelings at all, it shows that she is selfish. I have seen so many people hurt this way, the best thing to do is get out now or it will hurt too much
 
valafar should start his own religion.
Only a few more of those commandments and there are ten of them.

I'm trying to say that valafar is 100% correct with his instructions.
 
:erk:

Ok, Its been like a day since we broke up and I am feeling regrets, I feel paranoid when I see her talkin to other guys and stuff. I miss being able to touch her, but I guess this is what I am supposed to feel like so I should just take it on the chin.

I want to thank you all again, you've been more of a help than I thought.
And I did another most cheesy thing........ I wrote a poem/lyrics when I was feeling most down.
I always thought, once things were done and said, they become....memories, but if you write stuff down when you are emotional, the material that you write, doesnt just become a memory, but evidence of a time in your life:

This Heart Of Mine
Unseen For Ages
Grows Black In Time
And Falls To The Earth
Violent Dreams Tormenting Me
Paint A Darkened Scene
Your Master Plan
The Task At Hand
Is To Take
My Life Away

I Brace Myself For You
And The Hell You've Put Me Through
I'd Like To Feel The Air
I'd Like To Breathe Again One Final Time
So Now You're Blind And Can't See
A Sudden Sadness Grips Me
These Complications Impede My Ability To Breathe

What Have You Done To Me
I See No Wound Yet Still I'm Bleeding
Why Is This Happening
I'd Like To Know Why I'm Not Breathing Anymore
I've Heard It All Before
And I Tire Of The Lie

This Heart Of Mine
Begins Its Healing
Must Find A Way To Regain The Feeling
There's Nothing You Can Say Or Do
That Will Nullify The Damage Done By You
I Take Comfort In Knowing That You Are Gone For Good
Yet I Feel Your Eyes Watching From Afar
 
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