A Game: FIND THE FUNNIEST THREAD

[NAD]

Keenan > anyone

Danny Carey is better than every death metal drummer, he is the best drummer alive

I agree with this most days.

 

[Demonspell]

Sure, those Opeth fans are unaware of their own superiority complexes, but they do make some valid points, accidentally of course.

 

[Black Winter Day]

Tool = Opeth

I really like both. Tool is probably more interesting at the moment for me, though.

 

[Under a Stone]

http://www.ultimatemetal.com/forum/showthread.php?t=124864&highlight=Prof%E5nity

 

[J.]

I'm with BWD on this one, though probably for different reasons. Tool=Opeth.

Both released two high quality albums and then everything since (or before) has been kinda average or below.

I wouldn't say Tool is gay. Aenima is definitely a very beautiful record, though it dwarfs anything else they've done (kinda like what Orchid does to Opeth's other output).

 

[NAD]

Tool is great.

Fuck yeah they are.

 

[[0hr]Sunlapse]

i guess i'm in the minority when i say Tool's music has just kept improving, sure, their fans get worse and worse, but Lateralus is incredible imo. that record was really a turning point for me, in terms of musical growth.

 

[[0hr]Sunlapse]

Tool = not gay
overly obsessive fanboys of Tool (and Opeth, for that matter) = gay

 

[NAD]

i guess i'm in the minority when i say Tool's music has just kept improving, sure, their fans get worse and worse, but Lateralus is incredible imo. that record was really a turning point for me, in terms of musical growth.

Lateralus is incredible, a very worthy followup because they continued to evolve musically. They took away much of the artsy qualities of ÆNIMA but had more experimental music. Not quite as good as ÆNIMA, but nothing is.

Tool = not gay
overly obsessive fanboys of Tool (and Opeth, for that matter) = gay

Yes. Opeth fanboys are a bit worse, but not by much.

 

[Under a Stone]

I seriously need to hear more of Tool despite their supposedly pseudo-intellect and of course, their fans.

 

[NAD]

Opiate = hardcore
Undertow = metal
ÆNIMA = art rock
Lateralus = prog

Vague, but fitting. Don't let the psuedo-intellectual crap scare you off, much of their stuff seems deep (and much has a lot of symbolism behind it), but everything the band ever says should be taken with a grain of salt. More often then not, they are screwing with your head.

 

[NAD]

You've never heard them all the way through. Stop talking to me.

 

[NAD]

Haha, that's funny. I've probably yelled "so beer" while doing this before:

I didn't even like that song when Headbanger's Ball first started playing it. Then I bought the album at the local record store anyhow, because the cover was cool. Glad I did, obviously.

 

[Carbonized]

http://www.timebomb2000.com/vb/showthread.php?threadid=103513

Excerpt:

[font=Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif]Okay, I dare ANY of you to get the damn thing away from the dock, let alone navigate it.

Yup, a perfect platform for you and about 1000 of your closest (seaman) friends. Just the tug fees would be unbelievable methinks (but if you can afford the ship...)

That thing is just too big to handle, and God help you trying to keep it painted and running...

[/font]

and

If we owned it...
I'm thinking...
We prolly could offer the world an entirely different....umm...
perception....
of what the REAL "Pirate's Of The Caribbean would be like...
Heh...Heh...You think?...

[
Hey!....
"Lets hit Syria!...Heh...Heh..

 

[Ayeka]

I don't want to check out Tool. They seem to be very popular amongst the gays.

 

[Demonspell]

I guess now wouldn't be a good time to mention that autofellatio picture in one of their CD booklets...

 

[NAD]

Erik missed my post on taking them with a grain of salt. Then again most Tool fanboys take them far too seriously, joke's on them THEY ARE THE TOOLS AHAHAHAHhaaaeaetla.,eaa

I guess now wouldn't be a good time to mention that autofellatio picture in one of their CD booklets...

That's a woman, by the way.

 

[J.]

damn, this Tool thing is still going on? I'll agree with Erik on Lateralus, it was quite the gay poop, it was.

Opiate has like one good song. Undertow is OK, but has a lot of filler.

I still say Aenima is great hard rock record. There's really nothing too arty about it. It would have been even better if not for the stupid interludes like that German recipe thing, and the answering machine gayfag thing. The actual songs are fantastic with Stinkfist and Pushit being phenomenal.

But yes, Erik's right about the stupid artfag thing. Tool are not deep, and the stupid Bill Hicks crap is just plain dumb. None of the musicians are the best at their instruments, but they are quite competent.

Their MTV claymation videos have always been up-the-butt-gay and just plain stupid, no matter how much fanboys say they actually mean something and are symbolic.

Erik, at the very least, I'd say just have someone burn you a copy of Aenima, but skip over the stupid interludes. Ignore the rest of Tool's discography.

 

[Black Winter Day]

You Tool haters need more drugs. Pronto.

 

[Will Bozarth]

way to turn Agalloch into Godspeed You Black Emperor