Choosing an operating system (aka calling all computer gurus)

Not surprising it's much faster. With Windows, the longer you run it (without wiping it), the slower it becomes. I've never run Linux long enough and consistently enough to know if it would suffer the same fate. But I have to imagine it would be way better.
 
No, Linux (and by extension OS X) works very differently. Windows relies on it's registry which gets bogged down with entries overtime. You need to use something like CCleaner to keep things tidy and even then it won't catch everything. Between that, defragging your HDD (don't defrag an SSD), and cleaning out spyware/viruses, there's a few things you need to do to prevent your machine from slowing to a crawl.
 
general zod is basically right

the only problem is ubuntu is trash

edit: but honestly, go ahead and install ubuntu and if you think "hey this is kinda cool, i probably would like it if only it wasn't a blubberous mass of rancid vomit" then i can steer you towards something better in the future

because no matter how bad ubuntu is, at least it isnt windows 8

Don't front, we all know you're using Ubuntu Satanic Edition.

http://ubuntusatanic.org


In all seriousness, what Linux version are you exalting sir? I'm quite digging Ubuntu, so if ye know of something better, suggest away.
 
If you're new to Linux, I'd stay on ubuntu or go to Linux Mint. It's pretty much Ubuntu, but with less junk.