Do you use the handicap stall in public bathrooms?

[Valerie]

If my breakfast were put in the form of a weather forecast, it would go something like:

Chance of yogurt: 90%
Chance of cereal: 85%
Chance of microwaveable meal (i.e. lean pockets): 25%
Chance of bananas: 10%
Chance of other shit: 10%


Now let's see what's happening in your neck of the woods:

Grant Rose, my life in action news.

 

[muzmaze]

I guess you take your time. For me everything is a race, including going to the bathroom in public.

5 seconds: Put sanitizer on TP, wipe down seat
3-5 seconds: Pull down pants and sit down
10-20 seconds: Pee
2-4 seconds: Wipe
5 seconds: Pull pants back up
1 second: Flush
5-10 seconds: Wash hands

Guess when it comes down to it...it takes as long as it needs to. Can't put any time limit on my visits to the porcelain office. Its like taking a shower...I can't be rushed. The fact that most times it takes me longer to go than an actual handicap person out of TP-with diareah...maybe I do need to speed things up a bit?

 

[Zephyrus]

You must be a gigantic fatass. Or have a fortunate metabolism/exercise regularly. Either way I wish I could eat that shit for breakfast.

I am in perfect shape. I work a physical summer job, and my metabolism is moderately high. I'm fairly confident I've lost weight in past couple months.

 

[waif]

With regards to what Val said: I piss in public bathrooms all the time, but I would never ever shit in one. I guess the one in my res hall counts, I really hate using it. I worked 8.5 hour shifts for a year and never once had to shit in the toilet (there were a couple unpleasant days but you do not want to put your ass on anything walgreens customers touch).

I guess you take your time. For me everything is a race, including going to the bathroom in public.

5 seconds: Put sanitizer on TP, wipe down seat
2-4 seconds: Wipe
1 second: Flush
5-10 seconds: Wash hands

If it's a race, I can beat you by 13-20 seconds.

Also, as long as you wash decently there is no need for a man to wash his hands after peeing since:
A) Urine is sterile anyways
B) If you're super dexterous like me you can piss without actually touching yourself
C) After shitting people touch the sink handles before washing their hands. Think about it.

Hand washing is good, but unnecessary washing in a public bathroom is honestly detrimental to hygiene imo.

And before anyone makes oatmeal jokes, I haven't eaten oatmeal in three years.

Hasn't rained? Or was that Tara? At least you still avoid tourists.

 

[Zephyrus]

At least you still avoid tourists.

Ironically, I work at a bed & breakfast.

 

[Krow]

I dont like to use public restrooms... But, I've been thrown a lifelong curveball. I have IBS. If I eat something that doesnt agree with me, (enter most of the food I like) my guts dont fucking care where I'm at, the warning rumble comes and I either use a toilet, or I'll be using my boxers.

I've also learned to just wipe it off and sit down, never try to hover. When you've seen your own catastrophic blast miss its mark... the horror...

Handicap stalls are nice... especially where the other stalls are close together, I'm not that big of a guy, but I still get a little claustrophobic, I like to be a bit more comfortable when I take a dump.

 

[damnromulans]

I am in perfect shape. I work a physical summer job, and my metabolism is moderately high. I'm fairly confident I've lost weight in past couple months.

Plz post faceless torso pics

@Krow IBS must be a pain. Don't ever move to Asia or you'll have to learn to use squatters REAL quick.

WAIF deal, let's race. Maybe I'll come up to Montreal in a couple weeks, I have more free time than previously thought...

 

[mutantllama]

I know this is unrelated, but I just noticed

Fukuoka, Japan

Fukuoka

Fuk

 

[damnromulans]

You'll get extra giggles out of the fact that the airport code is FUK. So it says "FUK" on my luggage when I travel. HARAHARHARHARHAHARAR TEE HEE KEKEKEKE CHORKLE, WEE!

 

[Satanstoenail]

I generally try not to shit in crowded public bathrooms so I take 30-60 seconds for my entire bathroom experience.

This is definitely bullshit. Everyone knows that women don't actually shit. Especially attractive women.

 

[Onder]

Hrrrm. I was once in a hospital and there was ONLY the handicap toilet, so yeah, I used it and I have to say, that's quite a luxurious place there.

I guess you take your time. For me everything is a race, including going to the bathroom in public.

I once raced with a friend of mine, a heavy smoker if I can take a shit faster than he finishes his cigarette and I lost with 1:36, he was done in ONE minute. Fucking shit. Also, we once raced with this blonde chick who I always wanted: who'll be out of the toilet first if I shit and she pees and she was done within 15 seconds including washing hands!!, so you have a competitor there krampus. But she's known for small bladder and pausing coitus to go pee.

 

[mutantllama]

You'll get extra giggles out of the fact that the airport code is FUK. So it says "FUK" on my luggage when I travel. HARAHARHARHARHAHARAR TEE HEE KEKEKEKE CHORKLE, WEE!

So how do you guys pronounce it. Is it like Fuck, or is it more fook.


Oh also, I think I had a dream where me and Grant were timing how long it took each other how to wash our hands.

 

[Psychonaut]

I had to walk farther from my car to get to the restroom so I feel I deserve to borrow the luxury suite for a few minutes.

 

[sevag00]

Fuck public bathrooms. I never use them. I say ban Tom Brady.

 

[damnromulans]

Pausing coitus to pee? I just go and hope he doesn't care.

It's not "fuck," it's "foo-kwo-kuh"

 

[unknown]

There's a better poll question: Who makes every attempt to touch nothing with your hands in a public restroom?

this is me. good god. especially if it's a gas station bathroom or something. those are always the worst

 

[Dak]

Ain't that the truth.

 

[damnromulans]

I pooped in a broken gas station toilet on New Years Eve this past year. I REALLY had to go. I just left it there.

 

[mutantllama]

Pausing coitus to pee? I just go and hope he doesn't care.

It's not "fuck," it's "foo-kwo-kuh"

well that's lame.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

Pooping in bathrooms is like my 2nd favorite hobby.