Males and Females
- Thread starter damnromulans
- Start date
Manic Ferocity
Active Member
- Nov 5, 2006
- 5,280
- 559
- 113
I wouldn't waste my time, unknown. Sounds like you're tip-toeing around the obvious.
So I'm the type who fucking loves the chase but tell me if this situation isn't worth it...
I've been talking to this chick for two years and so far have hit it off better than with any other girl I've had relations with (if you want to call it that). She had a boyfriend the majority of that time and I just accepted friendship up until around last December when her and her boyfriend were on a "break." Me and her talked constantly and I eventually made a move one of the times we hung out which she denied. Apparently her and her boyfriend were planning on getting back together and she felt bad about "wanting" to do stuff with me (or at least that's what she said). I didn't take it too badly since I was going back to school and knew it was bad timing anyway.
I kept in moderate contact with her regardless of her having led me on, frankly because I legitimately enjoyed talking to her (which I can't say about many women). I got home from college and talked to her a bit in which, at some point, she brought up that her and her boyfriend were having problems. I didn't think much of it until she sent me a text wanting to hang out. I then asked her if she was doing better and she told me that her and her boyfriend had just broken up. I hung out with her a few days later but didn't make any moves so as not to jump right into it. I did however realize how much we had in common and felt like I might want to start something serious with this chick.
Afterwards, I got minimal response from her when I'd try to talk to her. I know for a fact that she's very busy but she doesn't seem to make much of an attempt to so much as talk to me let alone hang out so I'm not really sure what to think at this point. Is this worth it? Should I let her come to me at this point and if not just ignore it and move on? I don't think I've been coming on too strong thus far but I have to admit that I'm a very persistent person when it comes to this kinda thing.
I have little to no experience when it comes to more-than-just-physical relationships and I don't know how to react to shit like this. This situation is next to impossible as it is given the distance when I'm at school (2.5 hours away) and the recent break up she went through. I hate to say it but this is the second girl I've actually been "serious" about and would like it to work regardless of the blockades but, even more so, I'd like to be a man about it and move on if I have to.
So I'm the type who fucking loves the chase but tell me if this situation isn't worth it...
I've been talking to this chick for two years and so far have hit it off better than with any other girl I've had relations with (if you want to call it that). She had a boyfriend the majority of that time and I just accepted friendship up until around last December when her and her boyfriend were on a "break." Me and her talked constantly and I eventually made a move one of the times we hung out which she denied. Apparently her and her boyfriend were planning on getting back together and she felt bad about "wanting" to do stuff with me (or at least that's what she said). I didn't take it too badly since I was going back to school and knew it was bad timing anyway.
I kept in moderate contact with her regardless of her having led me on, frankly because I legitimately enjoyed talking to her (which I can't say about many women). I got home from college and talked to her a bit in which, at some point, she brought up that her and her boyfriend were having problems. I didn't think much of it until she sent me a text wanting to hang out. I then asked her if she was doing better and she told me that her and her boyfriend had just broken up. I hung out with her a few days later but didn't make any moves so as not to jump right into it. I did however realize how much we had in common and felt like I might want to start something serious with this chick.
Afterwards, I got minimal response from her when I'd try to talk to her. I know for a fact that she's very busy but she doesn't seem to make much of an attempt to so much as talk to me let alone hang out so I'm not really sure what to think at this point. Is this worth it? Should I let her come to me at this point and if not just ignore it and move on? I don't think I've been coming on too strong thus far but I have to admit that I'm a very persistent person when it comes to this kinda thing.
I have little to no experience when it comes to more-than-just-physical relationships and I don't know how to react to shit like this. This situation is next to impossible as it is given the distance when I'm at school (2.5 hours away) and the recent break up she went through. I hate to say it but this is the second girl I've actually been "serious" about and would like it to work regardless of the blockades but, even more so, I'd like to be a man about it and move on if I have to.
Aw man.
To the three who have posted, it sounds like (sorry for being blunt) you are all just being used because you're too nice/patient. Stop being so nice/patient and channel the frat boy assholes within, women love that shit.
Evil?, your situation won't improve until you decide you're done. I'd say "man up" but you clearly aren't ready to hear that and maybe you actually enjoy the whole perpetual heartbreak thing, who knows. Channel your feelings and create art.
unknown, hasn't she shattered your ego in saying she's not into you physically? You're not a bad looking guy and I know if someone told me he wasn't physically attracted to me, I would go out that very night and find someone better looking than him just because I could. Chances are she felt that way all along and just couldn't bear to tell you until that couple months ago. Unfortunately a big component of relationships is physical attraction - what are you going to do when she meets someone she clicks with AND is attracted to?
ObscureInfinity - Sounds like you were there for her when she needed someone but now she doesn't need you anymore. If she shied away from hanging out after spending a little time with you, she probably just realized she wasn't as interested in you as she thought she was and feels awkward about it. Girls are stupid.
****
What's a tactful way to tell your man to start weightlifting? Man-Purse and I are doing great but I kind of want him to beef up and get in shape. I am still a tub-o-love compared to a lot of women but I've been working at getting in better shape. I also think his potential musical career would benefit from him getting jacked. I can't really name any lead guitarists who don't have muscular arms.
To the three who have posted, it sounds like (sorry for being blunt) you are all just being used because you're too nice/patient. Stop being so nice/patient and channel the frat boy assholes within, women love that shit.
Evil?, your situation won't improve until you decide you're done. I'd say "man up" but you clearly aren't ready to hear that and maybe you actually enjoy the whole perpetual heartbreak thing, who knows. Channel your feelings and create art.
unknown, hasn't she shattered your ego in saying she's not into you physically? You're not a bad looking guy and I know if someone told me he wasn't physically attracted to me, I would go out that very night and find someone better looking than him just because I could. Chances are she felt that way all along and just couldn't bear to tell you until that couple months ago. Unfortunately a big component of relationships is physical attraction - what are you going to do when she meets someone she clicks with AND is attracted to?
ObscureInfinity - Sounds like you were there for her when she needed someone but now she doesn't need you anymore. If she shied away from hanging out after spending a little time with you, she probably just realized she wasn't as interested in you as she thought she was and feels awkward about it. Girls are stupid.
****
What's a tactful way to tell your man to start weightlifting? Man-Purse and I are doing great but I kind of want him to beef up and get in shape. I am still a tub-o-love compared to a lot of women but I've been working at getting in better shape. I also think his potential musical career would benefit from him getting jacked. I can't really name any lead guitarists who don't have muscular arms.
Dak
mentat
Get him P90X and resistance bands/dumbbells (and whatever else it requires). It's hard to get mad about it when there's a gift involved. Plus, dropping little comments about "beefcakes" you see around (although I am sure there aren't many in Japan) might work the jealousy angle.
Unfortunately he is too confident for the jealousy hints-dropping to work, and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't actually do P90x.
You're so right about the beefcakes in Japan. Every time I see a decently muscular dude I STARE and it freaks them out.
You're so right about the beefcakes in Japan. Every time I see a decently muscular dude I STARE and it freaks them out.
Dak
mentat
Jiggle the loose skin where his tricep should be an make jokes about how his arms match yours (or if yours have firmed up by now/then, how you are stronger than him). He will eventually get unconfident, or just leave you for a girl who doesn't make fun of his non-existent tricaps.
He'd dump my ass in five seconds if I did that. It's not like he doesn't have hordes of Japanese girls who are way better looking than me who want to jump his bones.
Dak
mentat
I guess you are stuck with ol Noodle Arm Man Purse then. Unless a guy just really enjoys working out (like Belligerent, myself, etc.), the only motivation he would have is to get laid or not get beat up. Doesn't sound like Manpurse has any legit motivation.
My time here in Spain has taught me to care less about relationships and more about enjoying life no matter what. When I was in America, my emotional states seemed dependent on if a certain girl was interested in me. Now, through all of my interactions and encounters with multiple women, I realize getting a girlfriend or success with women isn't the greatest thing in the world. I think all this has been good for my character.
By the way, that Asian-looking Arab girl didn't meet me for a date Friday. Do I care? No. I became less "in-touch" with her everytime we see each other. She seems interested in me having money and settling down. And she said since she's a Muslim she can't have sex before marriage. She said I need to buy a cell phone in Spain to date her. I showed my dominance by not submitting to buying a cellphone and telling her "I'm not going to buy something that's not guaranteed." I have good chemistry with her but this is probably it between me and her. Life will go on, my emotional states are not affected by her. I got to do whatever I wanted Friday night without a women directing me, that was fun.
I think I'm maturing because of this experience.
By the way, that Asian-looking Arab girl didn't meet me for a date Friday. Do I care? No. I became less "in-touch" with her everytime we see each other. She seems interested in me having money and settling down. And she said since she's a Muslim she can't have sex before marriage. She said I need to buy a cell phone in Spain to date her. I showed my dominance by not submitting to buying a cellphone and telling her "I'm not going to buy something that's not guaranteed." I have good chemistry with her but this is probably it between me and her. Life will go on, my emotional states are not affected by her. I got to do whatever I wanted Friday night without a women directing me, that was fun.
I think I'm maturing because of this experience.
Manic Ferocity
Active Member
- Nov 5, 2006
- 5,280
- 559
- 113
I figured as much. The main thing that keeps me from thinking otherwise was her complaint about her (ex)boyfriend being too simple-minded and unwilling to engage in deep conversation. So what did we do? Had a deep conversation. She knew damn well I was exactly what her ex-boyfriend wasn't. Girls really are stupid.
Dak
mentat
@Derek: Travel nearly always matures you. New experiences/different people challenge preconceived notions and give you new outlooks, giving you new levels of discern and thought interchangability.
You were convenient, available, and served a purpose for her when she needed it. Girls are incredibly cunning and smart.
@Dak yeah oh well. At least he's not flabby AND overweight
@Derek who is this manly man who hijacked your UM account? Glad to hear you're having a good time. Fuck religious chicks (not literally unless it's rape) with weird standards, they are worthless in your quest.
Saparmurat_Niyazov
Member
I realize lately that I was an expendable tool in my past to a girl that I considered to be a close and dear friend. When we first became acquainted, I had a pretty severe crush on her, but then I realized that we wouldn't be a good match in a relationship. Regardless of that, I considered her to be a close and dear friend that I could confide in whenever I needed to. I really valued her friendship and loved her not like a girlfriend, but like my own sister. Eventually, I met my wife and moved away, but tried to keep in touch with her. I've come to the realization now that she apparently didn't have the familial love for me that I had for her. She was never good about answering my messages, and now I see that she's been married, and I wasn't even invited to the wedding. I think I feel more betrayed than I would by an ex-lover because in my mind I really did see her as my family. It's just as bad as being disowned by my own flesh and blood. Like Krampus said, and my wife also said when I told her about the situation, apparently I outlived my usefulness with this woman. It's still infuriating and depressing though.
Manic Ferocity
Active Member
- Nov 5, 2006
- 5,280
- 559
- 113
You were convenient, available, and served a purpose for her when she needed it. Girls are incredibly cunning and smart.
Yeah, that kinda went over my head but I definitely suspected it. If women put their intelligence in the right places maybe they would have had rights a lot quicker and, ya know, invented a thing or two.
unknown
fuck ftagn
Evil? and unknown, go find yourselves some nice whores.
I'm workin on it haha
I don't really have much of an ego anymore, but I was pretty stunned when she said that. She's always saying I should dress different/nicer and blah blah blah. I think she has dependency issues er something. I'll go away for a week and she'll tell me about how much she misses me, and when I get back it's like no big deal. She wants a warm body in her bed so she knows she's not alone. whatever
I would actually go with the idea of it helping his musical career. Maybe one day when you two are watching a band, point out the guitarist (who hopefully has decent arms) and say, "Well that seems to make sense I guess. Stronger arms, wrists and hands makes for better guitar playing."
Manic Ferocity
Active Member
- Nov 5, 2006
- 5,280
- 559
- 113
Don't give her the time of day. I know that's easier said than done (since it abso-fucking-lutely isn't easy for me) but make her know that you aren't gonna put up with her beating around the bush. As an added bonus, you feel all-powerful and confident when a girl clearly can't stand your lack of attention for her.
Chanakya
Orphaned Brother
Alongside Death
On The Descent To Hell
- Oct 9, 2005
- 2,018
- 5
- 38
That was exactly the case with a friend of mine besides that she is not married, me neither but we were "friends" for some time and I really had fun with her. After we slept together about 4 times everything started to deteriorate. There were still traces of what was between us, I mean the kissing and fondling but it was never the same. Still, we maintain some kind of contact though it is very strange. We can talk on the phone for an hour but on msn she suddenly stops answering even though the conversation is enjoyable. I wasn't able to meet with her for over a month but I am still bothered with this strange relationship.
Similar threads
