Males and Females

[damnromulans]

Where the fuck do you guys meet women? I've exhausted my list of those I'm interested in that I already know (okay, it was just two). When I go out to meet ladies they tend to be vastly far too outgoing/wild. The mellow ones I do manage to meet tend to either be stoners or excessively religious. And good luck trying to meet a nice geeky chick that isn't either taken or at all physically attractive.

You've tried online dating sites I assume? I don't know how anyone meets anyone these days. I suppose if I were single tomorrow I'd meet loads of dudes but I have it easy since I am outgoing/wild and weigh less than 250 pounds. Do you do any art/music stuff that lends itself to meeting fellow artists/musicians? Since you like skinny women a lot maybe you should hang out at health grocery stores or yoga studios or universities where there are lots of Asians?

 

[waif]

If I ever got cheated on, I'd be much more angry with my bf, rather than the dude he was sleeping with.

Why be mad at the guy your girl slept with? It's your girl's fault entirely.

Depends. If he knew she was with you then you have a right to be pissed, but if she just goes out and fucks some random guy then it's entirely on her.

 

[The Butt]

No worries.

I've departed from that stuff a while ago, haha. My last girlfriend was 22 and my current one is 22 as well :B

I wouldn't mind going for an older woman, as they're usually fucktons smarter than high-schooler girls.

But instinct just sorta set in in this case, y'know? She had the looks, and she's actually a pretty nice, funny girl. It's just incredibly frustrating knowing that you gotta hit the "Abort Mission" button, just because you aren't 2-3 years younger than you are.

I'm kinda verging into devil's advocate territory here but is punching a dude in the face not just as primal an impulse as wanting to stick it in a hottie? Or is this a case of one act of caveman-ism deserves another? I realise that one act is despicable and the other is considered "defending your honour" or some shit, but the whole justified-violent-retribution thing never really sat well with me in any situation. Short of somebody causing great intentional, undeserved pain or anguish to a very close friend or family member, I can't think of anything that would drive me to find somebody and (attempt) to beat them into a pulp. I just don't feel like it would fix anything, nor provide any personal relief from the emotional pain.

I understand that punching the dude in the face is a pretty primal, caveman-like instinct; and it sure as hell won't make me a better person, but I dunno. I just view dudes who actively sleep with another dude's girlfriend, with full knowledge of the fact, to be utter scumbags. Sure, yeah, it's one thing to consider it, but it's another thing to actually act on it IMO.

And also, for the record I would view the girlfriend to be equally at fault. It's not "one is at fault, the other isn't" for me, I'd hold them with an equal amount of contempt.

Shouldn't hit a woman though, so I would just break it off or something, and never speak to the bitch again if I were in that situation. The dude however, would be in for a serious, no-nonsense fist-to-the-nose.

 

[skeptik]

And also, for the record I would view the girlfriend to be equally at fault. It's not "one is at fault, the other isn't" for me, I'd hold them with an equal amount of contempt.

Again, the wisdom of Seinfeld:

George: Oh my God. I must be crazy. What have I done?
Robin: Oh no, what's wrong?
George: What's wrong? I'll tell you what's wrong. I just committed adultery!
Robin: You didn't commit adultery, I did.
George: Oh yeah.
Robin: If I didn't do it with you, I would have done it with someone else.
George: Well, I wouldn't want you to do that. You know there's a lot of losers out there.
Robin: Maybe even someone who didn't say 'God bless you'.

But seriously, although both are at fault (assuming both parties are aware of the situation), but I would say the one actually doing the 'cheating' is more responsible for what happened.

 

[Episteme]

I remember back about 6/7 years ago when my girlfriend at the time cheated on me with a really good friend of mine. And he in turn was cheating on his girlfriend. It takes 2 to tango.

I got really pissed off with both of them, and my initial instinct was to punch him in the face but I didn't end up doing it because it really wasn't worth the trouble. Either way, they ended up having a stupid love triangle between the both of them and his girlfriend. I stayed out of the entire thing and did my own thing even though it still hurt. It took me awhile to get over it, but now all 3 of us are okay with each other again and my ex girlfriend continued a string of cheating after that. Poor other blokes o_0

 

[Death Aflame]

So, since we are on the topic of cheating. Has anyone been the dude that a girl cheated on her boyfriend with?

Yes.

 

[Mountains_of_Mars]

Well, i guess it wouldnt be fair to ask the question and not respond myself.

Yeah. and right now im talking to my friend's GF, who is talking like she is going to break up with him, but her and I have kinda been flirting a little bit. Its not going to go anywhere but hey, i've got nothing else lined up at the moment so im all for it. Also he doesnt know she is most likely going to break up with him. She also asked me that awkward question of, "do you think I should be with him?" If I would have answered honestly, I would have told her No, so I can get with you. I just gave the IDK, whatevers best for you

EDIT, the yeah and my story are two separate events :/

 

[JontRevolting]

Be careful there bud,sounds like you might lose a friend and gain a gf.Personal integrity is more important than getting your end in,i've been in similar situations,that's always an issue when you're friends with the dude and his gf.

 

[Mountains_of_Mars]

Yeah, thanks for the advice dude. Like I said, it wont go anywhere or anything. Plus, she's not really the type of girl I would date so its not like im tempted or anything.

 

[Matt]

I remember back about 6/7 years ago when my girlfriend at the time cheated on me with a really good friend of mine. And he in turn was cheating on his girlfriend. It takes 2 to tango.

I got really pissed off with both of them, and my initial instinct was to punch him in the face but I didn't end up doing it because it really wasn't worth the trouble. Either way, they ended up having a stupid love triangle between the both of them and his girlfriend. I stayed out of the entire thing and did my own thing even though it still hurt. It took me awhile to get over it, but now all 3 of us are okay with each other again and my ex girlfriend continued a string of cheating after that. Poor other blokes o_0

Now that is much different. I'd murder all of the involved parties probably.

 

[Pessimism]

Behold my latest creation!

 

[JontRevolting]

That bitch is Mr.Beans daughter!

 

[Cronopio]

@Cronopio:

I basically agree with everything you said except the face smashing bit, obviously hahah. Physical pain isn't a substitute for emotional pain, and it's not gonna teach you to be a better person. Maybe I'm totally wrong here but if some dude wrecked me for cheating with his girlfriend, I'm not gonna sit down the next day and be like "actually he made a very good point and I can now emotionally connect with him," I'm gonna be like "CUNT that shit hurt, I'm not gonna go there again." Sure it taught me not to fuck with HIM, but it didn't teach me not to fuck with some pussy-nobody who isn't capable of defending himself.

If I ever got cheated on, I'd be much more angry with my bf, rather than the dude he was sleeping with.

Why be mad at the guy your girl slept with? It's your girl's fault entirely.

I understand that punching the dude in the face is a pretty primal, caveman-like instinct; and it sure as hell won't make me a better person, but I dunno. I just view dudes who actively sleep with another dude's girlfriend, with full knowledge of the fact, to be utter scumbags. Sure, yeah, it's one thing to consider it, but it's another thing to actually act on it IMO.

And also, for the record I would view the girlfriend to be equally at fault. It's not "one is at fault, the other isn't" for me, I'd hold them with an equal amount of contempt.

Shouldn't hit a woman though, so I would just break it off or something, and never speak to the bitch again if I were in that situation. The dude however, would be in for a serious, no-nonsense fist-to-the-nose.

Alright, I'm not saying it's ok to punch someone. Maybe I worded that the wrong way. What I wanted to say, however, is that if I was the guy some dude's girlfriend cheated on him with, I'd understand him being pissed at me, and unless he beat me to a pulp, I wouldn't press charges if he decided to give me a suckerpunch. Sure, cheating on someone (or being the one with whom someone cheats on you) isn't illegal, whereas beating someone is, but sometimes you just gotta level with the moral side of it too.

When this happens, I just plug in a ton of electronics and yell and hit contact mics on metal. Works.

Ha ha, that's awesome!

 

[Zephyrus]

So cute girl's best friend, whom I'm actually friends with already, talked to me today and said cute girl has a crush on me, such that "she won't even look at any other guy." (and of course swore me to silence about her telling me that - I shouldn't have to worry about you guys).

This is the critical mass I was looking for. I'm still going to take things slowly, because it's going way too fast already, and hopefully she can tell me herself. But when the time is right I will be much more confident in declaring a relationship with her. Again, I've only met her in person twice.

This is weird. I've never been in a position where I knew that somebody had the hots for me. For one thing, she apparently likes my long hair.


And here's the other thing. My ex and I have only been apart for three weeks, and we are still living in the same house. Now a couple weeks back she promised me she wouldn't be jealous or hold any grudges for me getting together with someone else, but this seems sooner than sufficient to keep that promise. Obviously her opinion shouldn't matter but I do want to remain friends with her.

And the fact that this girl is religious and my ex is a hippie atheist could go make things go south quickly if, no not if, when they encounter each other.

 

[waif]

Bang at her place. Problem solved.
Duh.

 

[skeptik]

Obviously her opinion shouldn't matter

I disagree with this. Especially since she's still a part of your life, you probably should take into consideration how she feels about it. Of course it shouldn't exactly decide what you ultimately do, but it should definitely influence the way that you approach your decision in my opinion, and it may not even hurt to have a talk with her about you being ready to move on. Although, depending on how much longer you will be living together with her, it may just be prudent to wait on everything all together until you're in a different living arrangement.

 

[SentinelSlain]

Balls to exes.

 

[Draehl]

You've tried online dating sites I assume? I don't know how anyone meets anyone these days. I suppose if I were single tomorrow I'd meet loads of dudes but I have it easy since I am outgoing/wild and weigh less than 250 pounds. Do you do any art/music stuff that lends itself to meeting fellow artists/musicians? Since you like skinny women a lot maybe you should hang out at health grocery stores or yoga studios or universities where there are lots of Asians?

Dating sites, no. Everyone has warned me off of them, but maybe it's just a stigma. Artsy stuff? No way. I love artsy stuff, but purely from the consumer side of things. Health food... I like yogurt, not a bad idea.

 

[The Ozzman]

You have to give dating sites a little bit to give you a return. You can't be like Rick and delete the account after two days because he wasn't getting messaged by girls.

 

[damnromulans]

lolol Ozzman nice zinger!

Draele imo there's no shame in dating sites anymore. You just say you met at the location of your first date if people ask. I actually take back what I said earlier, I really don't know how I would meet dudes if I were single and looking if I didn't use the Internet. Meeting quality folks at bars etc is pretty hopeless most of the time. Dating sites are nice because you can sort of get to know a person before meeting her. The downside obviously is people whose pictures are deceptively flattering.

Zephyrus might be good to keep separate spheres for a while. How interested are you in religious girl? It might be fun to keep it casual/flirty before diving into possible relationship territory?