Males and Females

I would say it gets pretty hectic. She can be a very pessimistic, critical, and borderline controlling person. That isn't to say that I'm the nicest person to her all the time either but her personality has been making me want to get away lately. I live with her currently so it could just be a cabin fever sort of thing. It's hard for me to say. This is my first serious relationship so I don't know what to expect.

First serious relationship and you live together eh...mistake #1
 
No, you've only just realized that your desire to rekindle old fires is your coping mechanism. Why don't you just dump this chick if the only way you can stay with her is to think about other women? Who care's if you've been together for a year and a half? That's irrelevant. Unless, of course, she's supporting you financially or you're married.

i had the same kind of problem i think
i spent 2 years dating a woman that would beat the shit out of me every 2 weeks
 
First serious relationship and you live together eh...mistake #1

The moving in together is a 'mistake' that needs to be made for most people at some point. There is a LOT that cannot be learned about oneself and functionality in relationships without that experience IMO.
 
I should clarify that it isn't all bad and she is wonderful in a lot of ways. The fighting and negativity, however, is intense enough for me to at least think about my ex though.

I can't explain it because me and my ex have just about nothing in common. She's pretty much the polar opposite of my current girlfriend and kept her emotions concealed to the point of me not trusting her. It wasn't until we broke it off that I realized how much she was into me and how broken up she was about our break up. Maybe I miss the games. Either way, it would be a mistake getting back together with her since she's in the same friend circle of my girlfriend and I simply think I'd regret it. Maybe I just like the idea of being available again.
 
The scary thing is that I could easily do that if I wanted to lol. I just wouldn't be able to keep it a secret much less deal with the guilt. Me and my girlfriend broke up for two days a couple of months ago and I found my ex conveniently present at parties I was at two nights in a row. I hadn't seen her in almost a year up until then (and no she wasn't stalking me because I was visiting the university I was and she is enrolled at to see friends). There was no interaction or communication but it was plain as day that she was happy about my availability at the time.
 
This cute coworker of mine has a suicidal/paranoid boyfriend that her friend's trying to get her to break up with. This should be interesting.

Also, I chilled with this other coworker a week back, and I'm not sure what to make of it. I'm not sure if she was making a move, or just chilling. She suddenly asked me "do you ever want to get married?" That really caught me off guard. I gave my normal answer: no, because I don't want to be legally bound to a person when I stop liking them. By the way, by this point we'd smoked a few bowls, so I started rambling about wanting to adopt a child from a poor country, and joking about how a single father would have a tough time adopting a child.

She told me I should fall in love, and I managed to change the topic. We then sat on the floor and took bong rips and talked. She told me to add her on Facebook. Later she drove me back to where she dropped me off, and I was about to leave, but I noticed that after a couple minutes she was still there. I went up to her and she seemed kind of sad, and she said something about how she was getting to her parents' house too late and would get them mad. But then she stayed for another minute or two, still looking kind of sad.

Edit: By the way, she picked me up to hang at her apartment late at night.

Also, I'm not asking her. I think the most likely explanation is she was tired, not sad, and that she was just being friendly and reacting to things normally with no motives in mind.

Fuck, I feel like Jage right now, editing this post a fuckload. I'm gonna call editing a post a lot Jageing.
 
Met a girl at a club, she told me about a few cool metal pubs in Oxford. I met up with her at one and chatted and I hit on her and held her a bit. We got drunk and she left. I awoke with a fucking shitty hangover and a text saying she "wasn't going to go any further" with me. Shit sucks, this girl was fucking cool.
 
I actually appreciate the honesty. At least she was forward enough to actually tell me and not spin a web of bullshit. I can deal with just being friends, it's not like a relationship is actually going to arise. I leave in 3 weeks.