Males and Females

[Vimana]

I could read that her body language was saying yes, as is possibly the situation in numerous statutory rape cases. Anyways, I actually like the girl for more than her cunt, so I figured I would play it safe. I didn't want for her to feel uncomfortable the next day. Doesn't really matter now, though, since we're fucking.

That's good. I've always found sexual activity is more enjoyable with some amount of mental and/or emotional connection. I envy people who can get fully into it based on appearance alone. I've hooked up with women just for how they looked, but after I got past the initial rush, my interest died. And that's if I even got to that point.

But yeah, based on my experience, body language is pretty unambiguous. The times it appears to be misleading I've found are when a person's natural inclinations clash with a consciously-asserted idea, which is probably what you're talking about. A person who does not want to have sex can show sexually-aroused body language, but it doesn't mean they want to if they're disgusted/uncomfortable with their own sexuality.

 

[crimsonfloyd]

OK I need some honest opinions from uninvolved parties.

My roommate, whom I'm very close to, went through a domestic violence incident a few months back. I've been one of her main pillars of support throughout the whole event, from getting her out of the dude's place to getting her to call the cops and press charges to helping her emotionally on the day to day. She just got the subpoena today to come in to court on Thursday. It's gonna be the first time she's seen the guy since he was arrested. She wants me to go with her as support.

Of course, that's the day I'm supposed to go out and do all this fun shit with the yoga girl I shroomed with a while back. We had another really great 24 hour kick it last week and I'm really eager to keep momentum building with her. We're in eerily similar situations in life: both recently lost our fathers, both ended multi-year relationships. I don't know how to explain it exactly, but it feels like when we're around eachother there's a lot of healing going on. She has to go back to Canada for three weeks so this is the last chance I'll get to see her for a while. She seems really excited about this day trip we've planned too.

Worst part is I can't even explain why I'm canceling, cuz she knows my roomie and I can't spread my roomie's business within our social circle.

Right now I'm leaning toward hanging out with yoga girl. I'm justifying this to myself by saying that 1. I didn't have enough time to plan to go and 2. she can't realistically expect me to be there for every single step of the ordeal. I have to have my own life.

Am I out of line or is this sound reasoning?

 

[Dak]

I wish we had a rabid feminazi on this board to make this last page full of win.

 

[Zephyrus]

CF, are you expecting anything more out of YG after she returns to Canada?

 

[damnromulans]

Lol if you're gonna play around with nonconsensual roleplay you gotta expect you saying "stop, no!" is going to be interpreted as "she does not like it, abort abort" - this is something that needs to be talked about but that would be too complicated right?!

 

[PhlegethonVeins]

OK I need some honest opinions from uninvolved parties.

My roommate, whom I'm very close to, went through a domestic violence incident a few months back. I've been one of her main pillars of support throughout the whole event, from getting her out of the dude's place to getting her to call the cops and press charges to helping her emotionally on the day to day. She just got the subpoena today to come in to court on Thursday. It's gonna be the first time she's seen the guy since he was arrested. She wants me to go with her as support.

Of course, that's the day I'm supposed to go out and do all this fun shit with the yoga girl I shroomed with a while back. We had another really great 24 hour kick it last week and I'm really eager to keep momentum building with her. We're in eerily similar situations in life: both recently lost our fathers, both ended multi-year relationships. I don't know how to explain it exactly, but it feels like when we're around eachother there's a lot of healing going on. She has to go back to Canada for three weeks so this is the last chance I'll get to see her for a while. She seems really excited about this day trip we've planned too.

Worst part is I can't even explain why I'm canceling, cuz she knows my roomie and I can't spread my roomie's business within our social circle.

Right now I'm leaning toward hanging out with yoga girl. I'm justifying this to myself by saying that 1. I didn't have enough time to plan to go and 2. she can't realistically expect me to be there for every single step of the ordeal. I have to have my own life.

Am I out of line or is this sound reasoning?

She has to be able to address this stuff on her own. Anyone who has been through any sort of abuse can be aided by support but also crippled by it if its there for every call. That said, if I were in the situation i'm not sure which call i'd make. If she is a close friend, I'd have a hard time not going with her.

 

[Jimmy... Dead.]

If you value her as a true friend you go with her.

 

[monoxide_child]

OK I need some honest opinions from uninvolved parties.

My roommate, whom I'm very close to, went through a domestic violence incident a few months back. I've been one of her main pillars of support throughout the whole event, from getting her out of the dude's place to getting her to call the cops and press charges to helping her emotionally on the day to day. She just got the subpoena today to come in to court on Thursday. It's gonna be the first time she's seen the guy since he was arrested. She wants me to go with her as support.

Of course, that's the day I'm supposed to go out and do all this fun shit with the yoga girl I shroomed with a while back. We had another really great 24 hour kick it last week and I'm really eager to keep momentum building with her. We're in eerily similar situations in life: both recently lost our fathers, both ended multi-year relationships. I don't know how to explain it exactly, but it feels like when we're around eachother there's a lot of healing going on. She has to go back to Canada for three weeks so this is the last chance I'll get to see her for a while. She seems really excited about this day trip we've planned too.

Worst part is I can't even explain why I'm canceling, cuz she knows my roomie and I can't spread my roomie's business within our social circle.

Right now I'm leaning toward hanging out with yoga girl. I'm justifying this to myself by saying that 1. I didn't have enough time to plan to go and 2. she can't realistically expect me to be there for every single step of the ordeal. I have to have my own life.

Am I out of line or is this sound reasoning?

honestly
if you're actually asking us what you should do
(as opposed to just seeing what we'd say to a dicision you've already made)
tell you're roomate about your other plans and ask your roommate to make the choice for you
you really need to present it as a firmly spoken ultimatum
either your roommate tells yoga girl everyrthing that's going on, or
you and yoga girl will be having fun durring roommate's court day

it's totally unfair to you that your roommate is going to go to court to tell a jury of total fucking strangers that some dude beat her ass but yet she doesn't have the balls to tell the people "in her social circle"

this is total fucking bullshit
if she couldn't tell the people she actually hangs out with what happened, then she had no buisness telling the police

i'm not sympathising with the mysogynistic wife-beater guy here
but if he really did beat her, and if it was severe enough that calling the police was even an option, then at that point, calling the police should have been immediatly followed by calling everyone she knows,
i mean she's already gotten subpoenaed to go to court already, so at this point she just needs to get down off her fucking high horse and tell everyone she knows "hey i'm gonna be in a courtroom tommorrow and here's why..."

if she can't tell anyone other than you what's going on, then she can't realisticly expect you to go to court with her

 

[Zephyrus]

Domestic abuse is something hard for many to understand, and on top of all that, being haled into a courtroom full of strangers can be just as traumatic. It may seem like a token presence to have a friend in the room, but to her it may help tremendously.

I remember when I was young I was traumatized by something I saw on TV, and I couldn't go to sleep unless my cat was on my bed with me. I knew the cat couldn't do anything to defend me or speak to me or whatever, but just her presence there as a living being that I loved made all the difference in the world.

 

[SentinelSlain]

aren't we a bunch of faggots really, with our attempts at being intellectual and our middle class existence. Some stone cold thugs would piss themselves laughing at the prospect of killing us and a million conceited beautiful women would giggle themselves to death over it happening.

 

[Jimmy... Dead.]

Zeph, right on.

To the ignoramus above you.. I hope someone beats you, I sincerely hope it.

Chrome, WTF are you talking about. Take your pills man.

 

[PhlegethonVeins]

aren't we a bunch of faggots really, with our attempts at being intellectual and our middle class existence. Some stone cold thugs would piss themselves laughing at the prospect of killing us and a million conceited beautiful women would giggle themselves to death over it happening.

Jesus christ you're diluted.

 

[damnromulans]

If you value her as a true friend you go with her.

Yes. Why is this even a question?

CF you call yoga girl and say "I have to help a friend, it's a personal matter, let's reschedule on (list dates you are available)."

 

[crimsonfloyd]

CF, are you expecting anything more out of YG after she returns to Canada?

Absolutely.

She has to be able to address this stuff on her own. Anyone who has been through any sort of abuse can be aided by support but also crippled by it if its there for every call. That said, if I were in the situation i'm not sure which call i'd make. If she is a close friend, I'd have a hard time not going with her.

Yeah this is sort of where I'm standing. And yeah, she's a real close friend.

honestly
if you're actually asking us what you should do
(as opposed to just seeing what we'd say to a dicision you've already made)
tell you're roomate about your other plans and ask your roommate to make the choice for you
you really need to present it as a firmly spoken ultimatum
either your roommate tells yoga girl everyrthing that's going on, or
you and yoga girl will be having fun durring roommate's court day

Trying to force her to tell an acquaintance about one of the most traumatic experiences of her life would be a great way to ensure that I damage the friendship.

If you value her as a true friend you go with her.

Right. I'm really hoping one of her other close friends can go. I don't think I'll feel too bad if she's there with another good friend.

 

[crimsonfloyd]

Yes. Why is this even a question?

CF you call yoga girl and say "I have to help a friend, it's a personal matter, let's reschedule on (list dates you are available)."

Because I'm selfish and don't want to lose the thing I've been looking forward to all week to spend the day in court dealing with drama and my friend getting hysterical. I could try and justify it with more reasons than that, but ultimately it's really that simple.

And rescheduling means waiting til late February.

*edit: OK, gonna ask my roomie to see if she can get someone else to g with her. If she can't then I'll go with her. Not gonna make her go alone.

If that's the case I'll have to cancel with YG, but maybe she'll be down to see a movie or something in the evening. Not as fun as a what we had planned, but at least it's something.

 

[tagradh]

I'm seeing someone and have little interest in porking anyone else.

This hasn't happened for a long time.

Maybe because she actually has a similar 'sex drive' to me. (so many people will claim to, so few do).

And she's awesome.

But. IF I STOP WITH OPEN RELATIONSHIPS, PROMISCUITY AND ONE NIGHT STANDS HERE THERE AND EVERYWHERE, WILL I STILL BE COOL AS BEANS?

 

[viewerfromnihil]

aren't we a bunch of faggots really, with our attempts at being intellectual and our middle class existence. Some stone cold thugs would piss themselves laughing at the prospect of killing us and a million conceited beautiful women would giggle themselves to death over it happening.

Sig'd

edit: Girlfriend is sick, so no sex tonight

 

[damnromulans]

Good lord

My drive has taken a serious plummet into nothingness lately. Like...twice in the past week. I know WHY (being sick, feeling constantly backed up, too much stuff going on, the SAD) but this is gay. Hope it sorts itself out.

 

[Eligos]

Not to mention the bruised cervix, fucking bloody hell.

 

[Matt]

Good lord

My drive has taken a serious plummet into nothingness lately. Like...twice in the past week. I know WHY (being sick, feeling constantly backed up, too much stuff going on, the SAD) but this is gay. Hope it sorts itself out.

Same. I haven't had time to do anything at all besides work and school. No gym, sports, or anything. Lame.