Males and Females

[monoxide_child]

[/IMG]

the right side of this picture made my dick hard

 

[Vimana]

Yesterday I told some annoying guy who was trying to hit on me by asking for a drag off my ecig that I had herpes and then walked away. He didn't seem to get the hint. Is that not subtle enough? I have all but forgotten how nightlife mating rituals work.

Fake a phone call.

 

[monoxide_child]

so
i'm dating a girl for three weeks (including Valentine's Day)
she's ramming her tongue down my throat every five min and i've fingerbanged her and she's given me a hand job
everything looks fine, until a couple of days ago when her psych doctor tells her to not date anyone for 60 days
so now she's not dating me cuz she's not dating anyone at all
which would be okay, except that she has a source of income and i lost the person i was was gonna split rent with
so then this morning, (at church) a woman with a disability check who is a complete lesbian wants to move in with me,
also, at the same time my girl randomly out of nowhere breaks up with me, the blue-haired-boy's wife leaves him, for me aparently
i'm thinking about spliting rent with the lesbian because the blue-haired-boy's wife has no money (husband doesn't have any money either)

since me and the lesbian both get paid the same day
i'm seriously thinking about spliting rent with the the woman that's completely totally lesbian and then dating a married woman with absolutely no money just to get my dick wet

what do you guys think??

 

[monoxide_child]

http://www.ultimatemetal.com/forum/10560305-post882.html

 

[CF87]

 

[monoxide_child]

http://www.ultimatemetal.com/forum/10560305-post882.html

this^^ was aimed at Chromeheart

 

[unknown]

so my girlfriend's period was 28 days late. she basically skipped a whole cycle. I think it may have something to do with this cholesterol medicine she's been put on. She's been on it for a few months now, and ever since then her periods have become more spaced out and her sex drive has just gone to shit. but thank god she finally had her period. dodged that bullet

 

[Zephyrus]

My girlfriend texted me the other day saying she got hers. I replied, "Outwitted the stork yet again, eh?" To which she replied, "Yes, I saved society from my offspring...or at least saved a coat hanger and a quarter cup of bleach."

I love her.

 

[monoxide_child]

I've never read The Kite Runner. Should I be happy for the fact?

idk
i didn't read it either

 

[monoxide_child]

My girlfriend texted me the other day saying she got hers. I replied, "Outwitted the stork yet again, eh?" To which she replied, "Yes, I saved society from my offspring...or at least saved a coat hanger and a quarter cup of bleach."

I love her.

this is totally unrealted to anything being talked about here, but i still thought it really should be put in this thread instead of any other
http://whatisafurry.wordpress.com/2010/08/10/what-is-a-furry-what-is-the-furry-subculture/

 

[monoxide_child]

How about we show off just how picky we are (IE why we're single)? What are you looking for as "must haves" ? I have a rather extensive list here...

-European or East Asian
-Light skinned.
-Thin framed but not necessarily low body fat. Naturally smaller build with a couple extra pounds > medium build even in better shape.
-Cuter > hotter.
-"Bs" to please.
-No short hair.
-No tats/wild piercings and generally maintain a more "traditional" look.

-Mildy/moderately geeky but not over the top.
-Likes metal at least a little.
-Somewhat of a homebody.
-Nice/sweet personality, but won't put up with your shit either.
-Educated.
-Not liberal. Moderate/Libertarian/Conservative/Apolitical.
-A neutral suburban accent would be nice.
-Not a religious zealot. Church a few times a year is cool.

randomly quoting a random post from this thread

 

[SentinelSlain]

For me, at the minute, it would be a bit like this:, 5:9, slim but a bit curvy,brunette, straight hair, green eyes, very lightly tanned, smooth skin, great legs, beautiful bum, ample busom, nice hands, a very pretty face that's a mix of Olga Kurylenko, Elizabeth Taylor (in the day), Mary Elizabeth Winstead and a hint of Phoebe Cates (in the day). She should be foreign but it doesn't matter where from. She should also be highly educated, classy and sophisticated and verging towards the Right of the political spectrum. It would be nice if she was a great cook too and had a very warm personality and a good heart with some maths based know-how, maybe with a programming or engineering background. She should be the kind of person who puts there family before everything but not in a personal contact/ western kind of way, but in terms of making sure they are provided for, secure and well brought up in a traditional family setting.

 

[Dak]

Good luck finding a family first computer programmer bombshell. Wtf.

 

[SentinelSlain]

To be fair, a lot of women would probably quite like "adonis massage therapist, well hung, italian but also modern and pro feminist men who will be rich and can 'do things with their hands' but also be a house husband".

 

[damnromulans]

Yes but not Italian, they are racially inferior.

I have one of those minus the super wealthy part.

 

[wandering_taco]

Text message breakup?

 

[Zephyrus]

Yeah, a phone call would have been more courteous.

LG called me today. It's been two months since that fateful December evening. One week till she flies out to the Midwest!

 

[unknown]

text breakups are such bullshit. oh well.

 

[Dak]

Guess she couldn't handle the "d" amirite unowatimean Rick???

 

[Jimmy... Dead.]

Goooood you're gay.