Males and Females

[damnromulans]

Some people are really unattractive physically and/or have really weak personalities and little to nothing to bring to this table everyone is talking about. Cody and Eligos you guys do NOT fall into that category at all. I have no doubt you'll both end up happy eventually, whatever path is needed will be taken.

I think it's really cute how much PP likes NIN. I'm almost certain he likes Laibach and just doesn't realize it yet.

 

[KafkaX]

Thanks Laura.

PP likes NIN?! Fuck. Yes. Seriously one of my favorites. The new single Nails released is kinda weak, but then again, I didnt expect anything else...Excited for their tour though, itll be a blast to see em live again.

 

[damnromulans]

Yeah he loves them and has never seen them live (I have but I smoked too much and fell asleep oops). Thinking it would be a kind gesture to bring him to a show someday. Need to catch up and experience the weakness of the new single for myself, jeez.

 

[Vimana]

My friends keep telling me not to look for a relationship and just work on myself, and I think it's a load of shit. I'm not looking to find the person I'd like to be with for the rest of my life right now, but I'd like a significant other. I talked to the potential slam piece about what my friends told me yesterday, and though I saw how motivated her reasoning was, she made a good point in saying that I shouldn't let friends I haven't known for a long time decide things for me.

I was stupid for thinking that what I had before with the previous girl was something it wasn't. My friends seem to think I'll do the same thing again, but since they don't know me super well, they don't realize how I react to things. For one, the former girl I met while doing a lot of acid, when I loved everyone and wanted to change the world. I was so obsessed with peace and love that I forgot my own needs and created a manifestation for my LSD-induced idealism. Second, after strong feelings, I always approach things really cautiously to make sure I'm not fooling myself. This makes my judgment great, but my ability to open up and let go terrible.

Back to the original point, I've dated a person I had genuine compatibility with before, while I was self-aware and confident. I was just seventeen and felt confined by the relationship and wanted to fuck other girls. That girl started out as a rebound, a remedy to my loneliness, but turned into a fuck buddy to me.

I'm past the point of wanting to fuck every girl I think is attractive. My social life isn't exactly a big part of my life. I have a wide group of friends, but I only hang out with each of them occasionally. I want a person in my life who shares my interests who I can connect with emotionally, intellectually, and sexually, who I can communicate with on a regular basis, rely on, and share everything with. If this girl isn't that, I'll still look.

Being alone and/or having sex with random women isn't going to do anything for my development. The ways I'm developing myself are happening regardless of whether I'm single, in a relationship, promiscuous, or not having sex.

 

[Dak]

Having a steady slam piece is going to alter your development, regardless of whether you think it does or not.

 

[Vimana]

I don't see how. The ways I'm developing myself are independent of my social life. I'm working on my work ethic and pursuing knowledge in certain fields. My spare time could be spent on anything and it wouldn't alter how I'm developing, unless I was doing drugs or something.

 

[damnromulans]

Slam piece that you love and connect with = "I" turns into "we" for many things you never think it would.

 

[Dak]

Laura simplifed it, but yeah. A slam piece takes time away from other pursuits, which is going to alter them fundamentally. Then, doing things together rather than apart changes how those pursuits are pursued.

I'm not necessarily saying one is better than the other, but I do think that someone who has been on a relative rollercoaster both personally and in relationships, should back off and "find" themselves/gain a firmer foundation in their own lives before trying to mix it up with someone else.

 

[Eligos]

It is intentional and shes unsure about your appetite?...Is it possible she thought before getting involved that things were going to be more casual than they are now that you two are together?

Well fuck man, my intial reaction is to go fuck it man, ditch the bitch and find someone whos hungry and appreciates what you bring to the table...But then again, look at my situation, I should be taking the same advice lol

I wasn't going to let her off without communicating any of the questions you brought up in that first paragraph. Talking to her about it just kinda added insult to injury. She's been drawing comparisons between me and a boyfriend she had in high school, and basing her belief that I'm immature off of that comparison alone. Everything I've said in the last page was clearly stated, not assumed. I'm pretty much answering my own questions by writing this out.

The more I think about this, the more it seems that I just need to call it quits on this one. It's a classic bait and switch that I don't have the emotional capacity to deal with. Having her on my mind all the time leaves me feeling anxious and needy, because of the lack of contact, and going with the flow of that absence leaves me feeling single.

Some people are really unattractive physically and/or have really weak personalities and little to nothing to bring to this table everyone is talking about. Cody and Eligos you guys do NOT fall into that category at all. I have no doubt you'll both end up happy eventually, whatever path is needed will be taken.

Thanks, Laura It's Kevin, by the way.

 

[KafkaX]

I wasn't going to let her off without communicating any of the questions you brought up in that first paragraph. Talking to her about it just kinda added insult to injury. She's been drawing comparisons between me and a boyfriend she had in high school, and basing her belief that I'm immature off of that comparison alone. Everything I've said in the last page was clearly stated, not assumed. I'm pretty much answering my own questions by writing this out.

The more I think about this, the more it seems that I just need to call it quits on this one. It's a classic bait and switch that I don't have the emotional capacity to deal with. Having her on my mind all the time leaves me feeling anxious and needy, because of the lack of contact, and going with the flow of that absence leaves me feeling single.

Breakups are never an easy thing to go through, but from what Ive heard youll definitely be better off without her. Best of luck bro.

 

[damnromulans]

She's been drawing comparisons between me and a boyfriend she had in high school, and basing her belief that I'm immature off of that comparison alone.

Compares you to her HS boyfriend while calling you immature in the same breath?

Don't you work and go to school full-time and pursue music seriously and live on your own? How is that immature?

 

[Eligos]

Yes on all accounts, and I've met the guy she compares me to, the only similarity we share that I can gather is that we both play bass guitar in a band.

I've already done everything I can to elicit desire in this person while remaining truthful about myself, so if she doesn't want to be around, I'd rather not spend my time on a shelf.

 

[monoxide_child]

This thread needs less wussy shit and more awesome stories from m_c.

a guy born on Christmas Day and a guy born on the 4th of July have been spending the last few months hanging out with each other

about 2 weeks ago they decided they were both going to get drunk at the same time

after drinking vodka they took turns beating each other with a flashlight that had been purchased from wal-mart 20 hours earlier

the guy born on christmas got his face bruised up all to hell, the guy born on the 4th of july got his face cut up all to hell and bleeding all over the place, and the flashlight got cracked really badly (flashlight finnally stopped working a couple of days ago)

the flashlight and the bottle of vodka these 2 got drunk off of were both purchased with my money

the guy born on the 4th of july is donating plasma today to get money to replace the flashlight

 

[Matt]

Had a date with a hot slam piece the other night. Went well, tried unsuccessfully to have more dates with her, then today was told "I didn't feel anything that night, so I don't think I want a relationship with you, but I'm open to a friends with benefits type deal". So we fucked today, and now my desire to be with her is even worse. I'm too old for this kind of shit to happen. Fuck.

 

[KafkaX]

That sounds pretty legit to me lol How old are you?

Man, I dont know if Ill ever be too old to want to have a hot slam piece that just wants to fuck.

Yes on all accounts, and I've met the guy she compares me to, the only similarity we share that I can gather is that we both play bass guitar in a band.

I've already done everything I can to elicit desire in this person while remaining truthful about myself, so if she doesn't want to be around, I'd rather not spend my time on a shelf.

Truth.

 

[Matt]

That sounds pretty legit to me lol How old are you?

Man, I dont know if Ill ever be too old to want to have a hot slam piece that just wants to fuck.

I've got a lot of slam pieces I could fuck. This one has all the extras that make her ultra datable. Good job, smart, just a tad submissive, loves to cook etc.

I'm 22

 

[King Richard]

Had a date with a hot slam piece the other night. Went well, tried unsuccessfully to have more dates with her, then today was told "I didn't feel anything that night, so I don't think I want a relationship with you, but I'm open to a friends with benefits type deal". So we fucked today, and now my desire to be with her is even worse. I'm too old for this kind of shit to happen. Fuck.

She doesn't feel anything but is dtf? Interesting.

 

[damnromulans]

Some people are better at DTF sans emotions than others. I am not among them. I could probably have emotional relationships with like 15 people at once but am comfortable being physical with only 1.

PP is the first person I've dated who fulfills everything, my eye does not wander. It's CRAAAAZY and I'm not complaining. I also pretended to just be DTF and not into him for the first few months but he did everything right. So maybe that'll happen to you, Mathias

 

[KafkaX]

I've got a lot of slam pieces I could fuck. This one has all the extras that make her ultra datable. Good job, smart, just a tad submissive, loves to cook etc.

I'm 22

Those all might be extras that make her more dateable in your eyes, but the fact that shes DTF with no relationship, atleast to me, is a pretty red flag if you were to date her...

Normally its the other way around like what Krampus said. More often than not chicks are the ones hidding their emotions and pretending to just be DTF to lure in the guy shes interested in...Hook, line, sinker.

22 is still fairly young man. I wouldnt say youre too old to be dealing with this.

 

[damnromulans]

It was never a luring thing so much as we both obviously wanted to date but were just out of long term (in his case, super conflict-y on and off for 8 years) relationships and neither wanted to admit it. We basically pretended we were FWB until he was half asleep and murmured "I love you" HAHA

But since apparently being DTF with no strings is a "red flag" (I'd disagree of course unless you meant why logically invest emotionally in someone who claims they don't have feelings for you, which everyone should agree with) why would any sensible chick do things in that order?