Males and Females

[Carpe Mortem]

Messaged an ex a couple days ago since she seemed depressed. Told her if she needed to talk, I was always willing to listen.

I was met with an "OMG. Go away."

Now I remember why I didn't talk to the girl. Oops. She can wallow in her terrible personality, a personality that makes guys hate her and leave her a month in.

In her defense, the last thing a chick wants when she's depressed is a dude she used to date/bang talking to her.

Unless she's interested in getting back with that dude. Most women are gonna assume you want the pussy though, that's why she was a bitch.

Edit: I know that's not a defense, more of an explanation. Don't you have a woman anyways? You totally shouldn't be hitting up exes dude. Personal feeling on it, don't be 'friends' with exes, I view it as synonymous with having them on the back burner.

 

[Nephilim96]

Well, you're not going to get one. People are not just going to give you the answer.

I know, but I wish they would.

 

[The Butt]

In her defense, the last thing a chick wants when she's depressed is a dude she used to date/bang talking to her.

Unless she's interested in getting back with that dude. Most women are gonna assume you want the pussy though, that's why she was a bitch.

Edit: I know that's not a defense, more of an explanation. Don't you have a woman anyways? You totally shouldn't be hitting up exes dude. Personal feeling on it, don't be 'friends' with exes, I view it as synonymous with having them on the back burner.

I have a girlfriend, yes. But I have no intention of using my ex as a "backburner option". I was legit just trying to help and be friendly, and she reamed me out like a bitch.

Imo being friends with exes is no big deal. Girlfriend doesnt really care, thankfully I foud one who isnt a total jealous case.

 

[Zephyrus]

Being friends with exes is just a bad idea all around, IMO.

 

[The Butt]

Im friends with a couple of my exes, its only the one I have an issue with.

 

[The Ozzman]

Being friends with exes is just a bad idea all around, IMO.

This.

 

[Krow]

You guys must end relationships horribly. I've got two exes I've talked to regularly for years.

 

[crimsonfloyd]

I would say for the first 6 months or so it's not a good idea (depending how long you've been together) because otherwise you'll never get over it, but if you genuinely loved each other for a long time that love can often evolve into a platonic love, or at least friendship. Of course, it also depends on the conditions of the break up.

 

[Carpe Mortem]

I think one person always wants more than a non-sexual, non-romantic friendship, when you've seen each other naked. Casual friends, shoot the shit at parties, yeah. Talk on a regular basis, no.

 

[crimsonfloyd]

Eh I know people who do it. Mostly older people (40s and 50s) and maybe the drop in sex drive makes it easier. But it's certainly possible.

 

[The Butt]

I think one person always wants more than a non-sexual, non-romantic friendship, when you've seen each other naked. Casual friends, shoot the shit at parties, yeah. Talk on a regular basis, no.

Its possible to achieve platonic friendship with an ex, and NOT want or expect anything more from them, when you're not a sex-crazed fucking animal.

 

[Carpe Mortem]

Feelings though, man. Feelings happen, especially if one person is single and starting to encroach on 'lonely'. But different strokes for different folks. Just something I shy away from.

 

[The Butt]

When it comes to my exes, I found it quite easy to "flip the switch off" on my romantic feelings towards them. Except for the first and second, but then again, young naivete and whatnot. I'm a more stable guy as of the past year than I was before.

 

[Eligos]

My girl is friends with several exes that I have no problem with, but even though we're not on bad terms by any means, I have not maintained a friendship with any of my old flames.

 

[The Butt]

Exactly. I'm not saying remaining friends is mandatory, but I personally just prefer doing so. Props to people who are cool with their boyfriend/girlfriend/slampiece keeping exes as friends.

 

[Satanstoenail]

Messaged an ex a couple days ago since she seemed depressed. Told her if she needed to talk, I was always willing to listen.

I was met with an "OMG. Go away."

Now I remember why I didn't talk to the girl. Oops. She can wallow in her terrible personality, a personality that makes guys hate her and leave her a month in.

For the love of God man. Have some fucking dignity. What the fuck are you doing trying to be friends with this person if she's a cunt? Surely being in a relationship with her was enough to tell you whether she's a person worth knowing or not. Have you actually met her in person? Or is this another internet relationship?

Seriously, your romantic goings on are bizarre. There's no other word for it. I'd be keeping that shit to myself if I was you.

 

[Zephyrus]

Exactly. I'm not saying remaining friends is mandatory, but I personally just prefer doing so. Props to people who are cool with their boyfriend/girlfriend/slampiece keeping exes as friends.

At least in your case, it sounds like a profound sense of insecurity, as if being on bad terms with an ex-partner necessarily reflects badly on your character.

 

[Carpe Mortem]

I'm on good terms with all mine. I don't want them, there's a good chance they don't want me. I hang with the one on occasion I guess, due to mutual friends and a mutual sport interest. But I'd just rather not make the person I've committed myself to uncomfortable by going so far as having the ex's phone number... and I'd rather not mislead the ex by talking to them despite how uncomfortable it makes the one I'm with. They might think their friendship is more important to me than him.

 

[The Butt]

For the love of God man. Have some fucking dignity. What the fuck are you doing trying to be friends with this person if she's a cunt? Surely being in a relationship with her was enough to tell you whether she's a person worth knowing or not. Have you actually met her in person? Or is this another internet relationship?

Seriously, your romantic goings on are bizarre. There's no other word for it. I'd be keeping that shit to myself if I was you.

Every now and then, I try again in hopes that she has changed.

But now I know she never will, so I am content that I have tried by best. Such is life.

At least in your case, it sounds like a profound sense of insecurity, as if being on bad terms with an ex-partner necessarily reflects badly on your character.

Now I don't really care anymore. I only really tried again with her out of curiosity tbh.

 

[CF87]

I can't deal with women right now. I just fucking can't.