KafkaX
Mr. Self Destruct
Well things went really well yesterday at my exe's party. It was the first time it really felt like we were friends hanging out. No drama, no awkwardness. It just felt like hanging out with an old friend I hadn't spent time with in a while and we acknowledged as much to each other. Really glad we had that interaction before she takes off for half a year.
Cool man, happy to hear everything worked out in the best way possible.
As for me, I finally manned up and broke up with my girlfriend, for good this time. I feel a mixture of relief, sadness and anger. Of course the breakup went how must of our fights go, a lot of unproductiveness by the way of just bitching at each other. I wanted to have a smooth transition, for both of our healing to start on a healthy note but instead it's started on a anger filled note which leaves me wanting to be anything but nice to her. However, this does motivate me and reassure me that this decision is for the best.
Now comes the hard part. Got fucking blackout drunk last night because the sadness came in. I really did love her, as crazy as our relationship was, and cared for her a great deal. But the post breakup blues are setting in hardcore. All those things I took for granted are now no longer, I look back at all the good times, and look back at all the bad times, especially how I was a piece of shit a lot of the time and I get very very depressed and hard on myself. Hence why I drank fucking so heavy last night.
Just gotta stay strong and not get back together with her.