Males and Females

[viewerfromnihil]

There's a new intern working at my pharmacy. I've always had a big thing for Indian girls. She's nice to talk to and a solid Jimmy 10. We chatted quite a bit our first shift together and did the cute little catching each other looking at one another and smiling back and following it up with the downward glance, then bright-faced look-back. She's from New England and liked that I hope to settle down there at some point. I'd developed a bit of a crush. When she took off her lab coat to go to lunch, I saw her Jimmy 30 rear. In love.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

How does she rank on my beer rating list?

 

[CiG]

Indian as in from India?

 

[viewerfromnihil]

How does she rank on my beer rating list?

Ten Hamms out of ten.

Indian as in from India?

I'm pretty sure that she's first generation brought to the States from India as a child by judging how she speaks. Second-generation and raised speaking Hindi at home is a likely possibility though.

 

[CiG]

Dayum.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

No, like, how many beers would it take before you would be willing to fuck her? Some girls are 0, some girls are decent enough that a sixer will do, while others are only when you've crushed half a 30 rack.

 

[arg]

does she have hairy arms

 

[unknown]

Does she have a good cheek? A rosy glow?

 

[Omni]

There is a guy in the liquor store where I buy a lot of my beer who clearly likes me. He drops whatever he is doing every single time that I go there and stands near me, smiling, making small talk and commenting on my selections. He also pays attention to what I pick out and holds things that he thinks that he thinks that I will enjoy.

He isn't creepy or anything, but I don't find him attractive at all. He's definitely a hipster, down to having a stupid moustache and wearing a trilby. He's also shorter than me.

I guess that it doesn't bother me, as long as he doesn't go too far.

 

[viewerfromnihil]

Guys wearing formal hats casually--don't they know JFK killed the formal hat? @Omni

No, like, how many beers would it take before you would be willing to fuck her? Some girls are 0, some girls are decent enough that a sixer will do, while others are only when you've crushed half a 30 rack.

None, of course. Why would I want fuck a girl that I have to get drunk to be attracted to? I could fuck attractive women by deceiving them into thinking I'm interested in them. That's just not my thing.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

It's not about what you want to do, it's about what happens when you drink 12 beers and start hitting on a girl. Of course sober you doesn't want to do it, but you aren't sober now, are you?

 

[King Richard]

There is a guy in the liquor store where I buy a lot of my beer who clearly likes me. He drops whatever he is doing every single time that I go there and stands near me, smiling, making small talk and commenting on my selections. He also pays attention to what I pick out and holds things that he thinks that he thinks that I will enjoy.

He isn't creepy or anything, but I don't find him attractive at all. He's definitely a hipster, down to having a stupid moustache and wearing a trilby. He's also shorter than me.

I guess that it doesn't bother me, as long as he doesn't go too far.

Why are there hipsters in my homeland? This will not stand!

 

[viewerfromnihil]

It's not about what you want to do, it's about what happens when you drink 12 beers and start hitting on a girl. Of course sober you doesn't want to do it, but you aren't sober now, are you?

Well, I had had no beers when I met her, so that puts her at a zero out of thirty. I won't see her for another three weeks though.

Creationist (relativist is more accurate, really) girl texted me "happy birthday" today. My birthday is tomorrow. But it's not the day-of, so she didn't see it on facebook, which means that she remembered my birthday (almost). Our conversations usually dribble off after a date and then she texts me a month later. I've been flirting with her since. It's been about a month since we last spoke. I realized that I haven't complimented her on her physical features before after I did so today. It's a problem I have. I think the fact that I'm talking to them should make it obvious. I told her the news about Syracuse and she wanted to know when I would leave because she wants to spend time with me before I leave (this was before I commented on physical features). Of course we'll be hanging out again because I enjoy conversations with her and watching her facial expressions. I told her I was broke so couldn't do anything extravagant. She'll pay, she said. This was nice, but whatever also. I would rather just meet at a park to walk around and talk, and then have lunch and pay for our own meals.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

I fucking hate complementing on a woman's physical features. I wouldn't be pursuing them if I didn't already think they were attractive.

 

[viewerfromnihil]

I enjoy complimenting on a girlfriend's attractiveness. Complimenting on the attractiveness of somebody I'm dating that I'm physically attracted to, but have reservations otherwise feels dishonest.

 

[Satanstoenail]

There is a guy in the liquor store where I buy a lot of my beer who clearly likes me. He drops whatever he is doing every single time that I go there and stands near me, smiling, making small talk and commenting on my selections. He also pays attention to what I pick out and holds things that he thinks that he thinks that I will enjoy.

He isn't creepy or anything, but I don't find him attractive at all. He's definitely a hipster, down to having a stupid moustache and wearing a trilby. He's also shorter than me.

I guess that it doesn't bother me, as long as he doesn't go too far.

I had the same thing happen to me at my local liquor store. His name was Howard. If he was serving other people when I walked in he'd practically shove them out of the way and run over to me to recommend whatever new Shiraz was in at the time that he thought I'd like. He always complimented me on my superior taste in wine. He'd make lots of small talk and then remember said small talk and ask me about it the next time I went in. He'd also compliment me on my clothes. He even gave me free wine a couple of times. Then one day he was gone. I always wondered if it was because I never reciprocated his advances. He wasn't creepy or anything, but I'm not gay. Turned out he had a huge fight with the manager and quit and was probably just a good sales guy who didn't give a fuck about me.

 

[Omni]

Hipster beer guy has hinted at asking me to hang out with him a few times, but I think that he's too shy to actually ask me. I also think he's several years younger than me.

 

[Onder]

Hipster beer guy has hinted at asking me to hang out with him a few times, but I think that he's too shy to actually ask me. I also think he's several years younger than me.

I wish I could give him advice. It would be: shave that stupid fucking shit and listen to entire Ildjarn discography and don't fucking forget Sort Vokter. Do NOT ask her out. Read Ultimate Metal forums to see if she started liking you.

Done. Sex.

 

[Omni]

He's too short.

 

[Onder]

He's too short.

Shorteist. Triggered.

EDIT: that IS a thing, right??