My relationship is over, so is my band

yeah... fuck. this all should cheer me up and I'm really thankfull for your words. I was too stupid to believe it could work. This sucks so hard. Sorry for whining.

You have realized what your mistake was so don't apologize. Best to vent it, learn from it, own it.
Just step back from situations like these and try to take it from an unbiased logical view because your emotions are what blinded you in the first place.

Maybe best to just start a new project and put all your energy into it, just remember, don't stick your dick in it.
 
Take it slow and take your time. Don't try to comprehend what happened in one night, but process it piece by piece over time. Might take weeks, might take months, for me it took a year. Realize your mistakes but don't blame yourself for everything - it wasn't only your or her fault. After you've dealt with what happened, you'll be content with how things went and a significantly improved human being. That's how it was for me, anyway. We weren't in the same band, but as I realized most of my friends (and the dudes I played with) were more of her friends, and the breakup almost completely alienated me from those people.

And yes, it hurts like a motherfucker, so there's no reason to apologize for whining about it.
 
Ah, I've been there! But I am the only composer of the band so I replaced her with a MUCH better singer. :] So today, regarding the band, I am happy.

Regarding the feelings and all that, well I am not really the type who will want to kill myself because of a girl by principle. But there is always better sex and there are always cooler people. And being in a bad relationship sucks much more then not being in a relationship if you ask me. But break-ups can be real hard for the ego and self-confidence. So those are the things you want to boost right now... imho. And sometimes having sex with a fat girl helps hehe. And having sex with a skinny girls also. And if you ever dreamt about sheeps, well now is the time! You are free! Or a little road trip to somewhere you've never been or something. When my feelings are hurt and the sky is grey and my heart is bleeding, I try to do something I never did or very rarely do. It can be quite refreshing. Going alone in a tavern and getting filthy drunk does not really work for me because then I feel more pathetic and all that. The emotions start from the brain and the brain is a muscle!

edit : I would just like to mention that sometimes partying with a bunch of fun people can help. And that is really not the same as getting drunk alone in a tavern.
 
sorry to hear this, but I´m sure that after some time you will notice that you are more happy and you will meet your princess, the REAL one which you will marry with and you will be happy... :headbang:
 
Well the brain is not technically a muscle. :p But it can be trained like one. And emotions are born in the brain. I know a guy who studied in psychology a lot and emotions are electrical "thingies" that goes through the brain and they can be seen apparently. Creativity is still a mystery though.

edit :

What do each of these lobes do?

* Frontal Lobe- associated with reasoning, planning, parts of speech, movement, emotions, and problem solving
* Parietal Lobe- associated with movement, orientation, recognition, perception of stimuli
* Occipital Lobe- associated with visual processing
* Temporal Lobe- associated with perception and recognition of auditory stimuli, memory, and speech

http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/bb/kinser/Structure1.html
 
sorry to hear this, but I´m sure that after some time you will notice that you are more happy and you will meet your princess, the REAL one which you will marry with and you will be happy... :headbang:

How long did it take you to get over Roy? :D

sorry, had to ;)

As for the topic ... dude, really sorry to hear that. It happens, nothing to be done about it so that being the case, no reason to keep looking back on it. I know its not as simple as just breaking up with the girl, your band is heavily involved in this situation. All I can say is its important to to keep yourself at the top of the priority list. Don't get dragged down by the situation. At this point, its all about you and your own happiness and you shouldn't hesitate to do whatever you feel like to start making yourself happy again. That can be anything from field trips to titty bars, rebound sex with a couple random chicks, taking a little trip, whatever. 1st thing I did when a very serious relationship I was in for 5 years ended very badly (after I had all my shit moved out) was to buy a ticket to Germany and to the Wacken fest. Spent 10 days at the fest and stumbling through Hamburg, doing a whole bunch of shit that was really wrong but oh so right and I came home feeling like a new and better person.

You'll be ok dude, you just need to get out there and do something :kickass:
 
we wanted to marrie. this was really serious.

Seriously ... if she acted like an asshole she wasn't the right girl for ya.
Listen to me: what if your girlfriend wasn't an asshole and left you just because she didn't love you.
It happend to me, we stayed together for 5 years and half, I loved her so much as she did, but the last 5 months something had changed, she felt she wasn't in love anymore, she wanted to make it clear so she left me.
She respected me so much so she didn't want to fool me!
We're great friends now, fortunately she wasn't an asshole!
Believe me, better leave an asshole than a friend!
 
Damn, that's hard, such a double blow... normally the one thing should help you get over the loss of the other.

The other guys are right, don't let yourself get dragged down by this, even if it fucking hurts and you lost your perspective for the moment.
As corny as it sounds, life is full of opportunities and after a while when your vision clears you'll see them. As for now, take your time.
 
sorry to hear that man, sounds like you got hit in the two of the most impt parts of your life at the moment. my two cents:

about the girl - fuck the pain away... revenge/rebound sex doesnt exactly work but its a hell of alotta fun ;)

about the music - def try and capture/channel those emotions to work for you. take the most visceral elements of your situation and use them, cuz often while your situation may be unique, the raw emotions are universal.

best of luck man, i'll raise a glass for ya when i get home:kickass: