Not Worth The Effort?

[Draehl]

Let me phrase this in a manner that doesn't come off in a gay "dear livejournal" way.

Lately I've been analyzing my outlook on life and found a recurring theme. Many things in life that others consider essential or of utmost importance I see as little more than a waste in effort or simply an inconvenience. I don't mean that necessarily in a negative or depressing way, but rather that I'm generally happier with the lower effort alternative. Let me a give a few examples.

1. Driving 6 hours to Florida to go to the beach vs. going to a local pool.
   
2. Driving an hour to go see a band vs watching a concert DVD.
   
3. Going to a bar to drink vs. buying beer and drink at a friend's house.
   
4. Going out on a date vs. chilling out at home.

Florida is better than the pool. The concert is better than the DVD. The bar is better than beer at a friend's house. A good date is better than staying home. Yet, driving 6 hours, driving an hour + ticket price + dealing with most moron metalheads, paying bar prices, and dealing with bitches and or simply incompatible women isn't worth the additional enjoyment.

It's probably a combination of already being rather happy with the status quo (I'm easily entertained by the simpler/cheaper things in life like movies, games, music) and being easily bothered by random bullshit, and as such (to put it in scientific terms) I can't see how the marginal utility of doing something "better" is worth the marginal effort in order to do it.

I've found it's a mixed bag. I'm personally rather happy overall since as I said before I'm rather easily entertained and not often bored, but I find it's an outlook that doesn't play well with others and tends to annoy my friends/family. Would anyone else say you're blessed/cursed (depending on your outlook) by this particular mindset?

 

[Dak]

Buying beer and partying at a friends house >>>>>> bar.

 

[Draehl]

Buying beer and partying at a friends house >>>>>> bar.

either way

 

[Mentok]

Buying beer and partying at a friends house >>>>>> bar.

Agreed, If I go to a bar I would usually get in a fight with the douchers that populate it anyways. That and the prices are outrageous...$3-$4 per beer and plus a tip for the bartender?!?! Insane...

 

[Episteme]

I work in a bar but I prefer having drinks at a mate's house instead of going to a bar. And if people have the ingredients and I can be bothered I'll make good cocktails for people

But yeah, more tips for bartenders including me

 

[Mentok]

I always tip $2 per beer I drink and I usually end up drinking about 12 when I go to bars so I tip decent

 

[zabu of nΩd]

I think the bar and date examples are more complicated than just a "better vs. easier" tradeoff, but when it comes down to things like travel and concerts I definitely prefer those over their 'stay-at-home' versions because novel and exciting experiences are important to me. I want to do and see as much as I can in life, and a little extra work, stress, and even risk, are to me a fair price to pay for that. Only problem is that the 'better' experiences are more expensive and difficult to work into one's schedule.

 

[Pessimism]

Let me phrase this in a manner that doesn't come off in a gay "dear livejournal" way.

Lately I've been analyzing my outlook on life and found a recurring theme. Many things in life that others consider essential or of utmost importance I see as little more than a waste in effort or simply an inconvenience. I don't mean that necessarily in a negative or depressing way, but rather that I'm generally happier with the lower effort alternative. Let me a give a few examples.

1. Driving 6 hours to Florida to go to the beach vs. going to a local pool.
2. Driving an hour to go see a band vs watching a concert DVD.
3. Going to a bar to drink vs. buying beer and drink at a friend's house.
4. Going out on a date vs. chilling out at home.

Florida is better than the pool. The concert is better than the DVD. The bar is better than beer at a friend's house. A good date is better than staying home. Yet, driving 6 hours, driving an hour + ticket price + dealing with most moron metalheads, paying bar prices, and dealing with bitches and or simply incompatible women isn't worth the additional enjoyment.

It's probably a combination of already being rather happy with the status quo (I'm easily entertained by the simpler/cheaper things in life like movies, games, music) and being easily bothered by random bullshit, and as such (to put it in scientific terms) I can't see how the marginal utility of doing something "better" is worth the marginal effort in order to do it.

I've found it's a mixed bag. I'm personally rather happy overall since as I said before I'm rather easily entertained and not often bored, but I find it's an outlook that doesn't play well with others and tends to annoy my friends/family. Would anyone else say you're blessed/cursed (depending on your outlook) by this particular mindset?

I too am easily amused. Most consider this “childish” in many ways, I however take it to mean that I am still capable of enjoying the minute things in life, and am able to find joy or pain in things that others would easily gloss over. Do I over-analyze at times or find intrinsic meaning that doesn't exist? Certainly, but I recognize that anyway, and when everything is said and done I am still content and happy in my methodology and actions.

To use status quo in a manner relating to social status however, I have to say that my choices typically are based on monetary utility, rather than the lack of willingness to expend energy. At this point in my life, things are terrible. I can't afford food (been bumming off of people), am in a massive amount of debt, my grades are getting lower (probably a combination of work related stress, monetary stress, and driving/auto stressors). When given the opportunity to get to location B via two routes, one scenic (30 miles) another not (10 miles), I would choose the former if possible. I can't however because of cost. Concerts? Can't afford them. Alcohol? Fuck it. Dates? I have a girlfriend, and I wish I could take her out more than once every six months. My expenditure of energy is based on the means which I am forced to live by, not by want or desire.


Maybe you are just content with your position in life (to a degree), I know I am content with the shaping of my persona. Although I am always gauged as being heavily pessimistic and depressed. I view pessimism as a better alternative to optimism. My depression unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it) stems from my shitty social status. If certain variables were to change for the better, then I know the depression would all in all stop. People are annoyed to a degree by my personality, but they can't argue with it. I'm not depressed because I don't know what is wrong with me, I know exactly why – have you ever seen someone try to make a cohesive argument against your position when they have no form of valid/sound argument and know that you are indeed correct? For those who haven't I will fill you in: there is no argument, it's a silent and sorry agreement between parties about a shitty condition.


I'm not sure really how things compare with your situation though. If the beach were as close as the pool, which would you choose? If the band were playing free five minutes from you residence versus the dvd? Is the focus really on effort? In the concert portion you mention having to endure “bitches” (this is my general term for fucks I don't like at shows – which ends up being nearly everyone), and surely there would be a concentration of annoyance in a beach scenario (be it people/weather/whatever). I know I'm reaching for limbs here, but could it be that you are just preferential to already known comforts, rather than newer forms of the same experiences because they contain unwanted variables (drunks, idiots, annoying shit, etc.)?

 

[damnromulans]

Pshhh nothing wrong with being lazy. Keeps your heart rate and stress levels down.

 

[Saparmurat_Niyazov]

I've noticed that Pessimism and others in this thread face the same challenges I have for at least the past 10 years: desperate poverty. I used to wallow in self-pity and depression because of my socio-economic status, but I have a) gotten used to belonging to the $35,000 and under annual salary crowd, and b) have fine tuned my budgeting skills. It sucks that I can't see shows weekly like I used to be able to before I had a family to support, but I make sure to see about 2 - 3 kickass concerts per year. Bars are annoying, I've always thought so, so drinking at home or at friends' houses is always superior. I' married, so I have no need to meet women, but I would like to take my wife out more often. Once a year were try to take a mini-vacation without family or kids. It all comes down to being satisfied with what you have. As the buddah says: "Satisfaction is the death of desire".