And still day, masturbation isn't a sin, so I don't see why you can't beat off as much as your little heart wants.
Actually, it is. Sperm is considered a living thing, and if you whack off, then it's like you're killing potentiol people. According to the bible (Old Testament, at least) whacking off, homosexual sex, safe sex, and sex before marriage is not allowed, because you are wasting sperm. You're only allowed to cum if it's in a woman. Which is why lesbians are not forbidden (no waste of sperm).
So, yeah, any religion that allows lesbians, but not jerking off to them, is sadistic.