say something about ... yourself!

[dreaming neon darkspot]

make your own sandwich! or...something like "sawwich" as my mom says.

my brother makes a point to say "sammich"

 

[Captain Beard]

It sounds silly when you say it out loud.


...said the man who actually says "meats," "breads," and "sard" out loud, in public.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

nah, saying "sard" out loud just makes you more manly

 

[Captain Beard]

They're used to hearing that, but I still get weird looks for saying "tasty meats" while at the market. They don't seem to like my forced pluralization.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

it could be worse. you could be asian and take the plural away from everything.

 

[Captain Beard]

No, that would cause my logic functions to overheat.

 

[Chromatose]

or be like my grandma who pluralizes all store names:

Let's go to Walmarts

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

hahahaha

so... is it possessive like "let's go to the place belonging to Walmart!" or is she talking about going to more than one Walmart ... at the same time?

 

[Captain Beard]

I would, but see, going to Wal-Marts entails going to more than one for a shopping trip, which no mortal can withstand. Even my perfect meatiness would crack under the strain and the resulting scream and slaughter would wipe out 30% of the world population.

 

[Chromatose]

Also, "Kmarts" wtf?!

It might be a case of making them possessive? Maybe when she was young all stores were named after people so it's out of habit?! Or maybe I should stop analyzing it and just chalk it up to craziness.

 

[Captain Beard]

You should correct her. "No grandma, We're going to 'THE' K-Marts."

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

@ derick: the latter is usually the most reliable.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

You should correct her. "No grandma, We're going to 'THE' K-Marts."

to get 'THE' AIDS?

 

[Chromatose]

They usually have good prices on that, yes.

 

[Captain Beard]

See? Laura gets it.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

i was both distributor and receiver of the AIDS during my time there. i'd have to price match the AIDS that people saw advertised by THE Kmarts and THE Targets.

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

what if someone wanted to return their AIDS?

 

[Captain Beard]

Seeing how everyone has the AIDS, how did you manage to sell it?

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

I would, but see, going to Wal-Marts entails going to more than one for a shopping trip, which no mortal can withstand. Even my perfect meatiness would crack under the strain and the resulting scream and slaughter would wipe out 30% of the world population.

someone take David on a day-long trip to all the WalMarts in California, please...

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

Seeing how everyone has the AIDS, how did you manage to sell it?

i gave them Super-AIDS, of course.