- comes home with box of dozen donuts. "Anyone want one?" negatives. one hour later, Bill changes his mind and checks the box. empty.
"jeff, did you just eat a dozen donuts???"
later on that night he says he woke up sort of throwing up.
- other roommate's girlfriend brought some delicious apple bread from a bakery in connecticut for us all to share, at lisa's request. shortly i hear lisa yelling at jeff for finishing the apple bread. later, i found out that not only did he FINISH it, but STARTED it, eating the whole loaf. no one else had any.
- yesterday: girlfriend returned with another loaf of apple bread, and another loaf of peanut butter raisin bread. i specifically tell jeff not to eat them all this time.
this morning: i come downstairs to find a single sliver of apple bread left. clearly he carefully cut it off and left it so i could not accuse him of eating the entire loaf, then ate (basically) the entire loaf. I ate the sliver.
10 minutes ago: call from my roommate bill: "Hey, did you see that Jeff ate the entire loaf of peanut butter/raisin bread, except for one sliver?" "Yeah, totally! In fact, he--wait a minute. You mean the apple bread, right?" "No, the peanut-butter raisin bread." "Are you sure?" "Yeah! I ate the scrap he left. It was good!"
- espies me eating basmati rice with margarine. Critically: "i don't know why you eat that. it's full of carbs--terrible for you." (superiorally) "i don't eat carbs--i'm on the Atkins diet."
"jeff, did you just eat a dozen donuts???"
later on that night he says he woke up sort of throwing up.
- other roommate's girlfriend brought some delicious apple bread from a bakery in connecticut for us all to share, at lisa's request. shortly i hear lisa yelling at jeff for finishing the apple bread. later, i found out that not only did he FINISH it, but STARTED it, eating the whole loaf. no one else had any.
- yesterday: girlfriend returned with another loaf of apple bread, and another loaf of peanut butter raisin bread. i specifically tell jeff not to eat them all this time.
this morning: i come downstairs to find a single sliver of apple bread left. clearly he carefully cut it off and left it so i could not accuse him of eating the entire loaf, then ate (basically) the entire loaf. I ate the sliver.
10 minutes ago: call from my roommate bill: "Hey, did you see that Jeff ate the entire loaf of peanut butter/raisin bread, except for one sliver?" "Yeah, totally! In fact, he--wait a minute. You mean the apple bread, right?" "No, the peanut-butter raisin bread." "Are you sure?" "Yeah! I ate the scrap he left. It was good!"
- espies me eating basmati rice with margarine. Critically: "i don't know why you eat that. it's full of carbs--terrible for you." (superiorally) "i don't eat carbs--i'm on the Atkins diet."