What's the most horrible thing you have ever done?

[dorian gray]

Maybe you did and just don't remember?

 

[Dick Sirloin]

Why does he need to reaffirm that he's sexually active? Bro, you already clarified that this isn't Moose's new sn, so no need to be insecure, we're sure you're banging like a Hoss.

I ain't! Lurch keeps reminding me of the fact that I got rejected the other day by a 5th element broad. I ain't got no split-tail in weeks!

p.s. toldja you'd be back

EDIT: need new stories, people

 

[lurch70]

i am just trying to vicariously live through you single peeps ... but you keep disappointing me.

 

[Dick Sirloin]

I just don't know what you want anymore

 

[einride]

i can't think of anything

i'm so nice and morally spotless

 

[cthulufhtagn]

i blacked out and pissed in a fridge once, long long ago

 

[Krilons Resa]

thats not horrible. thats just embarrassing.

 

[cthulufhtagn]

well you know, to this day i feel bad for the dude who had to clean it up. the fact that i remember it at all is something.

 

[NAD]

After a moment I'm pretty fucking bored and tired of hearing this guy act like an ass, so with surprising agility, I manage to pull out and jam her in the ass (luckily she was a moist girl so I was well lubed by her). she let out this moan/yelp and dropped the phone. he's yelling at her about what the hell is going on, she's trying to get out coherent words, and I'm plowing away at her ass not letting her have a moment respite.

So amazing. I love it.

Pissing on a cat and destroying a women's public bathroom are up there for me. I know I've told the first story but I never said that I still see that cat all the time, and have for years. Nobody but one friend knows about that one, but I giggle every time I see that accursed animal. The second one was a personal low moment in frustration, but funny because the security guard kept a safe distance from us as we defiled the bathroom and then proceeded to destroy multiple vending machines. I got a $25 parking ticket that night, well deserved honestly.

My wife says I raped her like 2 weeks ago but I don't believe her lies.

 

[NAD]

I pooped solid green twice today, I don't know WTF is going on. After gettin' loaded last night I got a text from my drummer earlier and he said "I pooped a ninja turtle this morning" and then a few hours later I knew EXACTLY what he was talking about.

Not really what this thread is about, but that's still pretty horrible.

 

[NAD]

One time a friend and I were gettin' hammered and at one point he said something that pissed me off so much I chucked a lit cigarette butt at him. I always felt bad about that so it wasn't until 8 years later that I had the courage to ask what it was that he even said (I was drunk, don't recall). 8 years and I finally knew. I said "damn dude, you kinda deserved that then" and I stopped feeling bad. He just laughed, and then we went and saw the Carcass reunion.

Booze doesn't cause any problems, I swear.

 

[NAD]

One time I pooped on my own shoe. That was horrible.

 

[NAD]

When I was quitting a job I had been working for 9 years I realized "man, I've never jerked off here" so I went into the bathroom and started beatin' it. All I had for jerkfodder was a People magazine and I had to use some picture of Christina Aguilera to finish the job. I was pretty nervous (being 3 feet away from the boss's mom's office I guess), and laughing more than when I pissed on the cat that one time, so at the moment of truth it went EVERYWHERE and I spent more time cleaning up than I did doing the deed itself.

I never even liked Christina Aguilera as far as attraction goes, but ever since then we've shared a special sticky bond. Slut.

 

[NAD]

Huh, I think now I know how Catholics feel, this is kinda fun.

 

[NAD]

During a particular dry spell some years back, one time* I fucked my pillow pretending it was a chick.

*several times

 

[dorian gray]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

[lurch70]

hahhahhhah, these were great.

 

[Krilons Resa]

I pooped solid green twice today, I don't know WTF is going on. After gettin' loaded last night I got a text from my drummer earlier and he said "I pooped a ninja turtle this morning" and then a few hours later I knew EXACTLY what he was talking about.

Not really what this thread is about, but that's still pretty horrible.

I went through an entire week of the He-Man shits about 6 years ago when I drastically reduced my paroxetine dosage.

During a particular dry spell some years back, one time* I fucked my pillow pretending it was a chick.

*several times

I also used to do this pretty regularly when I was a young kid. Put two pillows between each other and fuck the middle. I used to unload on everything in the house and simply rub it in. The sofa pillows were all stained and crusty, the carpet had various crusty spots, as well as the bathroom rug. There's no way my mother didnt know but was too embarrassed to say anything to me. It was elevated when I found her pron drawer. Shortly therefater, the sofa was on the side of the house with a new one replacing it.

 

[lurch70]

I also used to do this pretty regularly when I was a young kid. Put two pillows between each other and fuck the middle. I used to unload on everything in the house and simply rub it in. The sofa pillows were all stained and crusty, the carpet had various crusty spots, as well as the bathroom rug. There's no way my mother didnt know but was too embarrassed to say anything to me. It was elevated when I found her pron drawer. Shortly therefater, the sofa was on the side of the house with a new one replacing it.

hahahha ... holy fuck!

dorian did you have the headphones bleached?

 

[Krilons Resa]