Ascending to the meek.... Fuck round the liars in awe! [Opeth Mistranslations]

[Julian Zembrowski]

well i dont know about anyone else but this is how i heard the moor...

The Sigh Of Plumber Upon his Return
15 Burly Men Since he was here
Bathed In their stench, blurring my eyes
Sniffing The first turd today

Crusting For What might have been ages
Still Smelly, chunky with peas
Would i prosper or fail, theyd drained their bowels
The craps from their moment, i take it theyre proud

I was born to plunge it, devoid of brains
Wearing my gas mask at birth
The hand of Todd, prepared and poised
Fold, depress and then wipe it

I was dealing with only 1-ply
A treason beknowst to the hand
Branded with shit stains, i claimed it was mud
Wiped it on my boss, that fucker

Stale lunch, residing in my anus
Cramped bum, burning my assshoollle
All the faces cringe away
As all could hear my painful cries

Outcast with darkness down below
Neared and pinching, astonished to see some corn
No mercy would help me on this day
In the searing pain, nothing is the same

Now hot flashes
I pledge myself to Satan
Release this demon
Ill explode if you dont end the game
If you'll fart off cue
Youll follow through

There is no forgiveness in these eyes
But everyone of you, just know
Expel the mist for now
Passing wind is the reason why life's fun

Pooooooo oooooo ooooooooooo Poooooo poooooooooooo oooooo Pooo oooo pooooooo ooooo ooooo

Splashing waterdrops over the seat rim
Piss stains now on my paaaants
Stained and torn, aged and brown <=== original line!
Virtuous man, with kidlike innocence

My throne smells like the miasma
Dont try pissing through the door
Piss goes here, where waters stir
Thought i had the distance, but i lost
If you'll try this pee
You'll have wetttt nike's
You know its true Mike too
This songs bout loos!

Jesus fucking christ that was good. Hahahaha.

 

[Mikael Åkerfeldt]

Hahaha! Love it!

Our sound engineer thought I said "Caught chatting to a lifeguard" instead of "From nothing to a life-code" in Deliverance. Also when we did "Harvest" Steven and Peter almost got me to change the line "Mourners lament but it's me who's the martyr" as they heard "Born of cement but it's me who's tomato" HAHAHA!!! Crazy! I got pissed off, but I could hear it myself!

Gotta work on my pronounciation eh?
Mike

 

[Jon Snow]

Hahaa, this thread rules. I think the most famous misheard lyrics of all time are from Hendrix's Purple Haze...

"Excuse me while i kiss the sky"
is often thought to be
"Excuse me while I kiss this guy"

 

[Ermz]

I knew there was something wrong with that Harvest line! Every time I tried to sing along and fit in all the written lyrics it never worked. I'll see how 'born of cement but it's me who's tomato' works out next time I cover it

EDIT: By the way Mike, it's 'pronunciation'. The way people pronounce that word is one of the biggest ironies I know of.

 

[sands of the seas]

you people are compeltely deaf

 

[Arnold Layne]

For some-one who's first language isnt english Mike can speak better than alot of people. Damn ebonics

Jon or as in Cheech and Chong "excuse me while i kiss this fly"

 

[fps]

where's the deadly badgers bit guys? the only ones i've recognised are break my face with my bear hands and erection returns...

 

[Luz]

Bwahahahaha! 'The Almighty' absolutely rules.
Alternative 3 has right. Although I keep doing the same grammatical mistakes. Who cares, at least some of you understands what I'm trying to say...

...No?

 

[deliverance]

For some-one who's first language isnt english Mike can speak better than alot of people. Damn ebonics

this is true. his vocabulary is very impressive, i'd say better than 60% or so of native americans (no, not indians). mike is a smart chap it seems.

 

[Reaper of Souls]

Heh... you're right, lol.. It sounds like a little wet fart or something.

Yes, a wet fart is a great way to to think of it

 

[OpethNZ]

Jesus fucking christ that was good. Hahahaha.

ehhe yeah it was enjoyable to write to, and then to listen along to the moor and read it

 

[synergy]

I was dealing with only 1-ply
A treason beknowst to the hand

hahaha....thats great

 

[dorian gray]

Gotta work on my pronounciation eh?

you mean, "gotta work on my new album, eh?"

 

[NFU]

you mean, "gotta work on my new album, eh?"

 

[BrandonS]

He could work on both! And do crazy "Resurrection Through Carnage" style voice distortion and pronounciations!! And he could layer his clean vocals like 3 times for every clean line he is singing... I liked the way it was done at the middle of A Fair Judgement.

 

[Risquit]

this is true. his vocabulary is very impressive, i'd say better than 60% or so of native americans (no, not indians). mike is a smart chap it seems.

And poetry, the highest form of language, is really a bitch for non-native speakers. Yet, Mikael pulls it off lyrically.

 

[deliverance]

^indeed

 

[OpethGuitarist]

I'd say more like probably 90%. Some Americans are really dumb.

 

[dorian gray]

^there is no statistical correlation between "low intelligence" and a "limited" vocabulary. that goes for the inverse as well.
buuuuuut, i know what you mean.

 

[Ermz]

So 90% of American's are really eloquent ghetto-trash then? . Just kidding guys. I hate this african-american ghetto slang that's caught on though... it's spread down here and I just want to suffocate everyone I hear using it. That or replace their vocal chords... painfully.