funny pictures thread!

nasty mike pic :ill:

free-the-shit-outta-you.jpg

:) :zzz:
 
Someone of my DoD:S clan has started posting FML's from his book, and I'm reposting them here as he posts them :)

Enjoi!





Mar. 30, 2011
Today, my mom walked in on me looking at an old Playboy from 1978. She asked if I found it in the basement, and I said yes. Then, I realized she was the centerfold. FML


Mar. 31, 2011
Today, an old girlfriend from years ago wanted to have lunch. Seeing as I had nothing to do, I went with her. She introduced me to her 6 year old son. Apparently I am the father. FML


Apr. 1, 2011
Today, I had to go to the dentist to have a cavity filled. About halfway through the procedure, something broke the silence in the room. It was my dentist, who had farted. I had to smell his rancid flatulence for the next five minutes. All the while, I had to keep my mouth wide open. FML


Apr. 2/3, 2011
Today, I fell asleep at work. I woke up to hear a voice at my ear, and, thinking it was my friend, I smacked him in the face. It turned out to be my boss. FML


Apr. 4, 2011
Today, my 5 year old daughter lectured me on my poor parental skills after I suggested that she watch Saturday morning cartoons. She used words like "unhealthy," "obese," "smaller IQ," and "un-educational." I'l take that Mother of the Year award now. FML


Apr. 5, 2011
Today, I opened my mail to find my Brown acceptance letter. Excited, I showed my dad, who just laughed and said, "What, it's not like it's harvard." No one in my family has ever gone to college. My dad didn't even graduate from high school. FML


Apr. 6, 2011
Today, I got a phone call saying I was no longer a bridesmaid for a wedding in June. It's my mother's fourth wedding. I'm getting replaced by our dog. FML


Apr. 7, 2011
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. On the bright side, she was kind enough to send me an invitation to her wedding next week. FML


Apr. 8, 2011
Today, this guy that I have been secretly in love with for two years asked me into an empty classroom. He handed me a bouquet of flowers and a t-shirt that he silk screened "prom?" onto. I said it was the most adorable thing I had ever seen. He asked if I thought that my best friend would like it. FML


Apr. 9/10, 2011
Today, I saw the blueprints for my family's new house. My rooms is half the size of the room next to it. The room next to mine - my step-mom's walk-in closet. FML


Apr. 11, 2011
Today, I was walking slowly and awkwardly down the stairs on my crutches. After two steps, a screw fell out of the left crutch and it collapsed. I now have a broken arm from trying to protect my broken leg as I tumbled down two lights of stairs. FML


Apr. 12, 2011
Today, my boyfriend broke up with my at my grandma's funeral so I "wouldn't make a scene." FML


Apr. 13, 2011
Today, my husband decided it was time to tell me he had a 3 year old son. We have been married for 5 years. FML


Apr. 14, 2011
Today, I crashed my car racing backwards and told my parents I was rear ended. They made me call the police and file a report. I hope there were no cameras. FML


Apr. 15, 2011
Today, I decided I was bored while I was pooping and decided to pain my nails. I had to wait at least 30 minutes to wipe. FML


Apr. 16/17, 2011
Today, I was eating a dish of ice cream at a local restaurant, when I felt something strange in my mouth. At first, I thought it was just some stray plastic packaging or something. Then I realized it as a small bandage. FML


Apr. 18, 2011
Today, when I was at my girlfriend's house, I farted and blamed it on the cat. I forgot the cat died 2 weeks ago. FML


Apr. 19, 2011
Today, I realized the person I have been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML


Apr. 20, 2011
Today, I realized that my life is so boring that I could not think of a single thing to complain about. FML


Apr. 21, 2011
Today, after taking a shower, I noticed a weird noise and asked my husband about it. "I think it's in the walls," I told him. After careful inspection, he simply turned off the electric razor I had just used to shave my legs and gave me 'that' look. I had beaten him in an IQ test not 24 hours prior. FML


Apr. 22, 2011
Today, I hid my credit card from myself so I wouldn't use it. Now I can't find it. FML


Apr. 23/24, 2011
Today, I realized that I know more about paris Hilton's cervix than how my government is run. FML