Males and Females

[Talos of Atmora]

Or HBBs random soliloquies.

Oh, I totally forgot about those!

 

[Serjeant Grumbles]

Women are flakier than a French pastry;; don't you forget it.

 

[Serjeant Grumbles]

No, scratch that, flakier than baklava.

 

[Dak]

Flakier than dandruff omg lolwut

 

[Carpe Mortem]

Barter and betting system? Lord have mercy i would get dripped every time! I actually want to understand the barter and betting system but I don't think it's an appropriate question to ask

Lol Nah it's good. For instance he'll want me to come to the store with him, and I'm like hell no this couch is awesome, and he'll say okay but what if I cook dinner, and then I'll go and we're both happy. Or we'll be watching a show and have differing opinions on the outcome, so we make a friendly bet, usually involving me having to give a back rub if I'm wrong or him having to play video games with me if I'm right.

There's a lot of back rubs being thrown around this home. Tbh he's in debt and I might attach a vig to the shit.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

He gets back rubs? Fuck that, I want my dick rubbed.

 

[CiG]

Of course you do, you're not involved in anything steady you rock'n'roll dirtbag motherfucker.

Backrubs are the shiznit.

 

[no country for old wainds]

dickrubs and backrubs are all well and good, but it's footrubs that mean marriage is around the corner.

 

[Carpe Mortem]

Real men are too sore from real man work to prefer temporary sexual release over long-lasting muscle relief.

If you'd prefer a hand job over a massage, I'm pretty sure you're not a real man, you're a kid who doesn't get either often enough.

But you will someday, little fella. I'm rooting for you.

 

[Jimmy... Dead.]

Rubs and regular jobs are great but how bout a nice upside down milking, that's how you know your bitch is a trooper

Add a rusty trombone and I might put a ring on the pig

 

[CiG]

Real men wife fucking chiropractors.

 

[The Ozzman]

Real men wife fucking real doctors.

Fixed that for you.

 

[The Butt]

I give dandy backrubs. No none of y'all can have one.

 

[Krow]

dickrubs and backrubs are all well and good, but it's footrubs that mean marriage is around the corner.

Pretty sure you mean this the other way around but in my experience a footrub puts you in the express lane to a woman's vagina.

 

[Master_Yoda77]

I'm more of a butt rub kind of guy.

 

[no country for old wainds]

Pretty sure you mean this the other way around but in my experience a footrub puts you in the express lane to a woman's vagina.

i meant it more in the sense that feet are fucking disgusting fetid husks of decayed cheese and if you're willing to touch another person's it must be true love

 

[HamburgerBoy]

Someone had the television warming up downstairs with Curious George incidentally playing, and I've discovered that I have a crush on The Man with the Yellow Hat. Intelligent, caring, facially aesthetic, tall, and loves animals, what more can you want?

 

[no country for old wainds]

you'll poke your eye out on that nose.

 

[Onder]

I am only 4'11, and I feel intimidated by most people since everyone is taller than I am.
Tall guys can seem really scary until they turn out to be kind, lol.

Well I'm a fucking slavic alcobarbarian and I had to convert your feet hands whatever to actual units and you're a really small person google says. I'm a little taller but I can be kind as fuck tbh if you want.

 

[SentinelSlain]

inb4 you're someone's alternate account