King Richard
Hello there
The King's Seal of Approval: Would Pee In Butt.
Indeed.
Except that that's actually completely psycho jealous invasion of privacy type behaviour and if the amount of trust has fallen to the level where that is even considered as an option then the 'relationship' is already well and truly doomed.
Didn't you say you've only been together 6 months? That's nothing.
That's pretty much the angle I was going for; completely ridiculous to the point that you should realize it's not worth it anymore.