Valerie
¯\(ã)/¯
- Aug 29, 2005
- 6,765
- 4
- 38
1. Instead of saying "of course", you must say "of corpse". There are no exceptions to this rule.
2. Call everyone "duder", even your mom.
3. Don't listen to Six Feet Under.
4. Don't be gay.
5. Don't be Chris Barnes. (see rule number 4)
6. Have your birthday at Chuckie Cheese with all your death metal friends. Attempt to get little
kids to headbang with you.
7. Be "brutal".
8. Be "sick".
9. Get a job at a preschool and get all the kids to mosh, or no naptime!
10. If possible be "brutal" and "sick" at the same time.
11. Eat lots of marshmallow peeps, and throw up the horns while doing so.
12. Throw up the horns wherever and whenever possible.
13. Swear that "marshmallow peeps are death metal".
14. Talk only in your death metal voice.
15. Throw up the horns while doing so.
16. Glen Benton is God.
17. "I'm gonna kill you just because I want to..."
18. Moshing at a rave is not "death metal".
19. Krisiun owns you.
20. And your grandma.
21. Have Ramen noodles and beer together.
22. Chuck Schuldiner was more brilliant that Beethoven.
23. Stab anyone who disagrees.
24. Don't be Marliyn Manson. (see rule number 4)
25. Don't listen to In Flames.
26. Never wear corpsepaint.
27. Unless by corpsepaint you mean being covered in freshly killed blood.
28. When in doubt, blast beat.
29. Color choices for a band logo include red and only red. Nothing else will be permitted.
30. I mean it!
31. If you have twins, they will be named Azagthoth and Corpsegrinder.
32. Insist that blast beats improve everything.
33. Even sex.
34. Being vegan or vegetarian is not "death metal".
35. Cattle Decapitation still kicks ass.
36. Angela Gossow has more balls than you.
37. If your album cover doesn't have blood and/or other types of gore, it is not "true death metal".
38. When having your picture taken on a roller coaster ride, be the only one not screaming; and throw up the horns
while doing so. Failure to do so will result in death.
39. Bathing is only permitted once every 2 weeks, and must be in blood.
List made by Tyler Marsh
2. Call everyone "duder", even your mom.
3. Don't listen to Six Feet Under.
4. Don't be gay.
5. Don't be Chris Barnes. (see rule number 4)
6. Have your birthday at Chuckie Cheese with all your death metal friends. Attempt to get little
kids to headbang with you.
7. Be "brutal".
8. Be "sick".
9. Get a job at a preschool and get all the kids to mosh, or no naptime!
10. If possible be "brutal" and "sick" at the same time.
11. Eat lots of marshmallow peeps, and throw up the horns while doing so.
12. Throw up the horns wherever and whenever possible.
13. Swear that "marshmallow peeps are death metal".
14. Talk only in your death metal voice.
15. Throw up the horns while doing so.
16. Glen Benton is God.
17. "I'm gonna kill you just because I want to..."
18. Moshing at a rave is not "death metal".
19. Krisiun owns you.
20. And your grandma.
21. Have Ramen noodles and beer together.
22. Chuck Schuldiner was more brilliant that Beethoven.
23. Stab anyone who disagrees.
24. Don't be Marliyn Manson. (see rule number 4)
25. Don't listen to In Flames.
26. Never wear corpsepaint.
27. Unless by corpsepaint you mean being covered in freshly killed blood.
28. When in doubt, blast beat.
29. Color choices for a band logo include red and only red. Nothing else will be permitted.
30. I mean it!
31. If you have twins, they will be named Azagthoth and Corpsegrinder.
32. Insist that blast beats improve everything.
33. Even sex.
34. Being vegan or vegetarian is not "death metal".
35. Cattle Decapitation still kicks ass.
36. Angela Gossow has more balls than you.
37. If your album cover doesn't have blood and/or other types of gore, it is not "true death metal".
38. When having your picture taken on a roller coaster ride, be the only one not screaming; and throw up the horns
while doing so. Failure to do so will result in death.
39. Bathing is only permitted once every 2 weeks, and must be in blood.
List made by Tyler Marsh
