yes, yes you're right and it was understandable. 
i'm going out in a short while. at some point of the day it looked as if i wasn't going out because my partner for the night backed out. then he was feeling stupid about backing out and decided he would not. so in one hour i am going to be faced with someone i haven't seen for six months and who has caused me a summer of sheer agony (one and a half years ago. last summer was awful for worse reasons. am i ever going to get a good summer?). but there's things that need to be said and done and undone too.

i'm going out in a short while. at some point of the day it looked as if i wasn't going out because my partner for the night backed out. then he was feeling stupid about backing out and decided he would not. so in one hour i am going to be faced with someone i haven't seen for six months and who has caused me a summer of sheer agony (one and a half years ago. last summer was awful for worse reasons. am i ever going to get a good summer?). but there's things that need to be said and done and undone too.