Here are few bands that I listen to, that have ventured off into 'queer' territory, many of which are fantastic bands.
All-time favourite bands include:
London After Midnight
Marilyn Manson (early stuff)
Squid/616 Abortions (their singer is transgendered apparently)
Cinema Strange (singer sounds exactly like a girl at times!)
Other cross-dressers, 'fems', drags etc.
Uninvited Guest (singer is gay)
Shemale Zero
Murderdolls
Frankenstein Drag Queens from Planet 13 (good costumes)
Dragchrist (I don't mind some stuff, probably the gayest thing ever)
Sopor Aeternus (believe its just a guy who thinks he's a she, without any real operation)
Fear Cult
HIM (early stuff)
Undercover Slut
IAMX
and various other bands!
I also like that "You Spin Me" song by Dead or Alive, as well as "Goodbye Horses" by Q Lazzarus.