The Opeth joke thread

[Profanity]

I'm sorry if this thread offended anyone, it was meant to be a nice break from intellectual conversation and put a smile on peoples faces when they can see theur favourite band in a humouress way.

 

[TehLeperAffinity]

i've been using this bass player joke with different bands since like 7th grade. amazing that it works with every single band

Even Ill Nino?

 

[Profanity]

i've been using this bass player joke with different bands since like 7th grade. amazing that it works with every single band

That cwon't last forever, you'll have to start thinking of a new one.

 

[Profanity]

I don't.

 

[JoeVice]

one day, a man and his daughter went to the beach...that night they watched a beautiful sunset. the next day, they decided to do the same thing...but the day never came.

"why isn't it bright outside like it usually is in the daytime?" asked the little girl the next morning.

With his face cupped in his hands, the man sighed, "because this is blackwater park."

 

[Profanity]

 

[TehLeperAffinity]

How did Martin Lopez know that princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her head and shoulders under the steering wheel.

 

[the_3_toed_sloth]

How did Martin Lopez know that princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her head and shoulders under the steering wheel.

Ahahahahhahahahahahahahaha.

 

[Profanity]

How did Martin Lopez know that princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her head and shoulders under the steering wheel.

that's not very original.

 

[TehLeperAffinity]

that's not very original.

Yeah. Ok, buddy.

 

[Profanity]

Here's a bmore original one:

Why is the water never silent at night?

because Dan Swano swims in it.

 

[TehLeperAffinity]

What do you get when you cross Mikael Akerfeldt and 2 babies?

2 dead babies.

 

[deliverance]

speaking of blackwater park, here's another one:

q: why is the album called "blackwater park"?

a: because mendez and lopez are mexican, which is kind of like being black

What do you get when you cross Mikael Akerfeldt and 2 babies?

2 dead babies.

one day, a man and his daughter went to the beach...that night they watched a beautiful sunset. the next day, they decided to do the same thing...but the day never came.

"why isn't it bright outside like it usually is in the daytime?" asked the little girl the next morning.

With his face cupped in his hands, the man sighed, "because this is blackwater park."

 

[Profanity]

I didn't get that one.

 

[TehLeperAffinity]

Bass player just flew in from New York. Boy, does his arms hurt.

 

[Profanity]

Bass player just flew in from New York. Boy, does his arms hurt.

and the airport staff lost their hearses when that happened.

 

[JoeVice]

i heard this one a while back...

what is the pope's favorite band?

Popeth!!!

 

[Profanity]

:Spin:

Are you drunk?

 

[ChrisEmerson]

this is the worst thread ever. I havent seen a single funny joke. Im about to make it worse.

Mikael Akerfeldt and Martin Lopez walk into a building. You'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

 

[Kenneth R.]

don't any of you pursue a career in comedy. we would all be doomed.