The Ultimate Battle of Homosexuality

Who prods each other with their heavy metal swords of fire and steel?

  • ManOwaR

    Votes: 4 36.4%
  • Rhapsody

    Votes: 3 27.3%
  • Hammerfall

    Votes: 4 36.4%

  • Total voters
    11

MajestikMøøse

Membrum virile
Jul 28, 2003
22,234
303
83
Not Siberia
into_glory_ride_cover.jpg
vs.
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vs.
261103-hammerfall.jpg



DISCUSS
 
Well, Hammerfall dont' have swords in that pic, so clearly they would be the first to get it in the pooper. That's how a battle of homosexuality would take place, right? Last ass unvoilated = winnar? I'm gonna give the edge to Manowar since they're more muscly and rhapsody mostly just pose with swords. And as we all know, Manowar aren't posers, right? RIGHT?

I mean its in their songs! "True metal people wanna ROCK not pose! *hackneyed riff* Wearing jeans and leather not cracker jack clothes *hackneyed riff*" To this day I still don't know what the frig "cracker jack clothes" are. Nor where all these posers wearing them are. Must be some poser bar I'm not allowed in. Because all the bars and "halls" I go to they immediately declare "Wimps and posers - LEAVE the Hall!" Though I don't know exactly why they'd have to kick them out since they "don't attract wimps, 'cause [Manowar is] too loud. Just true metal people, that's Manowar's crowd."

If you hadnt' noticed, Manowar is my favorite metal comedy act next to Spinal Tap. Although I think I'd more likely try to get my band to play some Spinal Tap.

Hammerfall "falls" (HEHEHE) short on the self-pimping lyrics. There's only one or two songs that blatantly state their name and how they will prevail (whilst hailing, though who or what they will hail is unkown, hopefully its not Hitler).

Rhapsody never makes mention of themselves, but still are incredibly gay as evidenced by the Forest of Unicorns which cannot be merely quoted or explained, but must be heard in order to understand the hilarity therein.

Well, that's it for me in regards to three of the most hilarious bands around today.
 
I've heard one song from one of those bands, that's it. Aren't Rhapsody the dudes with Saruman on one of their album covers?

That naked black metal band somebody posted a few days ago was the gayest thing I've seen, that shit would make Boy George blush.
 
When it comes to their music, I have no idea.

Solely based on those pictures, Hammerfall just look likes dorks that have played Dungeons and Dragons too much and watched far too much Babylon 5. Why does that dude have stripes on his jeans?

Manowar, dunno. They just strike me as a bunch of guys having a good time taking things to the extreme. They seem pseudo-gay.

Rhapsody, though, look like they take their poo-stabbing ventures very seriously by dressing like gay vampires from the movie Underworld, especially the gay cabalero in the hot-pink shirt. And any band with a Michael Bolton look-a-like must be well versed in the art of turd pushing.
 
metalskater7 said:
why wasn't nightwish included in this?
you're a failure

Nightwish has a WOMAN in the band. So clearly they can't be having non-stop gay buttsex orgies on tour. Thus their elimination from the competition.
 
OH yeah! I almost forgot. The singer for Rhapsody calls himself "Fabio Leone" This is not his given name, meaning he has CHOSEN to be known as "Fabio." That's pretty gay in my book.
 
who are these new people in the RC forum? Can we include their avatars in the poll above?
 
you live in queens, i will walk there and smite you with my magic steel and continue to fly away into the red skys on a black dragon.