The (Un)official write anything you want page

[Reign in Acai]

To clean the vajeen? I dunno, I don't have much experience with it, but it was my understanding that if you keep blasting your load inside your woman--and she doesn't give it a proper cleaning--then that shit begins to smell like hot trash in August.

Have you ever been scolded for pulling out and letting the hot wax gusher forth like Athena from the head of Zeus? I was having a rasslin match on a bathroom floor with my ex bint during work lunch hour one long lost moon ago, pulled out my glowstick (as a buddy endearingly refers to it as) and had let it fly. She normally would take the hadoken with glee, but on this particular occasion it was considered a social faux pas. She covered up with both hands and uttered admonishments, as the DAP splattered her shirt. Trollop


Dorian, how did ye end your sessions with your mistress?

 

[Dick Sirloin]

That is understandable, though (since she presumably had to go somewhere after). You couldn't hurry over to the sink or something? (As if such a thing would be possible.)

I believe the point is this: once you get to know and basically trust a chick (on the pill, no STDs, no whoring), then FUCK RUBBERS. Seriously. It barely even counts as sex.

 

[Reign in Acai]

That is understandable, though (since she presumably had to go somewhere after). You couldn't hurry over to the sink or something? (As if such a thing would be possible.)

Her noggin was literally 9 inches from the base of the bowl, figured it was fair game to go for money.

I believe the point is this: once you get to know and basically trust a chick (on the pill, no STDs, no whoring), then FUCK RUBBERS. Seriously. It barely even counts as sex.

Probably only used one pack in my entire life, I've dry humped chairs that provided more satisfaction than relations in cellophane.

 

[dorian gray]

(also upset that I didn't get a about my "pull out" joke)

I thought it was pretty funny

 

[Tide In Mind Out]

Earlier this morning I was reading this whilst my fiance was on the other side of the room getting dressed. He randomly blurted out "BURSTED NUTS!" (this is normal behavior btw), and I said "wow that's actually what I'm reading about." Good stuff

 

[lurch70]

man, fuck rubbers ... i wore them maybe 4 times in my life.
i went bareback with all the new chicks I met ...

they couldn't refuse when they saw the menu.

 

[dorian gray]

 

[Blind Guardian]

Jizzing on chicks is one of the best things about sex. They like it, too.

I NEVER EVER EVER EVER blow my load within..... even if she's on birth control (and she goddamn better be).

Girls actually like to get ejaculated in, it's a warm and tickly feeling right below the belly. Just go pee afterwards.

 

[lurch70]

did a UM search for "vajeen" land you here?

 

[Blind Guardian]

Talk about vaginal discharge and I'll be there.

 

[Dick Sirloin]

I fucking HATE this shit right here:

SATAN: You're going to hell, y'know.
ME: Cool.
SATAN: You can even bring all your earthly possessions with you.
ME: Nice!
SATAN: Here are your boxes. Oh, and by the way, YOU HAVE TO USE STRAPPING TAPE!!!!
ME:

 

[dorian gray]

Where the fuck do you think you're going?

 

[Krilons Resa]

man, fuck rubbers ... i wore them maybe 4 times in my life.
i went bareback with all the new chicks I met ...

they couldn't refuse when they saw the menu.

THIS.

Also, LOL @ Justin and this new fella.

 

[lurch70]

going to see a free EMPD show next week in a park .... in gangland part of BKLYN ... fo' real ...

 

[Krilons Resa]

you mean EPMD?

 

[Vittra]

http://www.tmz.com/2012/06/07/bob-welch-dead-fleetwood-mac-suicide/

 

[lurch70]

you mean EPMD?

those guys too ..

 

[Krilons Resa]

Fuck Lebron James.

 

[Dick Sirloin]

http://www.tmz.com/2012/06/07/bob-welch-dead-fleetwood-mac-suicide/

As if any of you ignorant fucks know mid-period Fleetwood Mac

 

[neal]

did he play on 'gold dust woman'