What to do when....

Thanatopsis123

Thanatopsis123

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Oct 13, 2002
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Ok, so a while ago I was in a car with a friend who I'm slowly getting more and more into metal and some chick. I had brought along my Winds - Reflections of the I album to introduce it to my friend. I figured it's a great album, might as well give it a try.

He hadn't heard much of it when the chick starts to laugh and say "what the hell is this?" To say the least, she was extremely condescending. This, of course, automatically ruins it for my friend. He doesn't even give it a try after that point.

It pissed me off that the bitch thought Winds were laughable and also that my friend blew it off so quickly. What would you do in this situation? I just tried to ignore them and my anger at that point and tried to get into the music until we reached our destination.

Also, how exactly do you introduce some types of metal? I just don't understand what was funny about Winds. Thyrfing is another band I've personally heard laughed at. Others include such bands as Kalmah and even Immortal. For some reason Death Metal seems to shut them the fuck up and quiet any laughter.

Criticism is one thing, but incessant, unjustified laughter.... Maybe I'm over reacting.
 
thyrfing and kalmah are both supurb bands. i treasure my kalmah cd and thyrfing cds
immortal is laughable though heheh, i think they suck
~gR~
 
I dunno. I know this girl who thinks that Garm sounds like a Disney villain on La Masquerade Infernale, but she adores Ulver. Go figure. She's pretty goddamned weird about musical tastes. Dixie Chix, My Dying Bride, Dave Mathews Band, Katatonia, Creed, The Gathering, blah blah.......

Fucking dick tease. :(
 
Closed-Mindedness is all it is. The sad fact is, you won't be able to get most people into metal, simply because they refuse to like it. Even if you put on the best thing they've ever heard, they'll probably shun it. No point getting angry.
 
That sucks. I don't know if there's anything that you can do. Personally, I wouldn't play metal in front of a chick, because most chicks would not like metal and would most likely laugh at it. It pisses me off how the general public thinks that metal is crap and utter shit like Nelly and 50 Cent is good.:mad:
 
Ignorance is pathetic. One time, I brought Dreaming Neon Black along with me and ten seconds into Beyond Within, this guy made a comment Nevermore sounds like Slipknot.

Bottom line, people are just ignorant, and if it's not played on the radio, they supposedly have the right to degrade it. In their minds the reason it's not played on the radio or advertised is because it isn't worthy of receiving attention in the mass media.

There's nothing you can do about it. Just turn your head the other way. After all, why would you want a bubblegum pop freak listening to Opeth or In Flames? They obviously think everything sounds the same, and that shows how little one appreciates music.
 
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Bringing metal with you on car trips with other people is always weird. Some of the comments I've gotten are as follows:

"Hey man, 80's music." (Any metal band with solos..so pretty much all metal bands)
"Is this Zorro? :lol:" (Rhapsody's Gargoyles, Angels of Darkness)
"Why does he sound like a chick?" (Maiden, Helloween, etc)
"Ehh..I'm not much of a death metal person, except for Slipknot." (Cynic, Blind Guardian, a few other bands)

Those are just some of them. And I've also gotten the laughing thing, it pisses me off too.

Sometimes though they don't even say anything, which is priceless. They get so uncomfortable. The looks on their faces. It's like they just saw their boyfriend/girlfriend naked and they turned out to have the wrong genitalia.
 
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He hadn't heard much of it when the chick starts to laugh and say "what the hell is this?" To say the least, she was extremely condescending. This, of course, automatically ruins it for my friend. He doesn't even give it a try after that point.

It pissed me off that the bitch thought Winds were laughable and also that my friend blew it off so quickly. What would you do in this situation?

Just realize that we (metal-heads) are unique and wonderful creatures. Most people will not understand us and our music. In fact, some "metal-heads" don't understand each other. Some people don't like prog-metal or death-metal for example but love another genre. It's different tastes and personalities that make us each individuals and what's good to some isn't always good to others.

I just tried to ignore them and my anger at that point and tried to get into the music until we reached our destination.

Also, how exactly do you introduce some types of metal?

People's taste evolve slowly as opposed to changing overnight. Using myself as an example... my first experience with metal was AC/DC "Back in Black" which is really hard rock, but it opened the door to bands like Dio. Dio led to bands like Accept. Without Accept due to their intensity, I might have not been able to handle Metallica when it was offered to me. After listening to thrash music and some of those bands being technically brilliant with time changes and stuff, I might not have developed an ability to grasp prog-metal.
What I am trying to say is that the transition from AC/DC to Fates Warning wasn't an easy task. It took years. If you are really good friends with this guy, introduce him to music that is a logical evolution toward the stuff you want him to like.


I just don't understand what was funny about Winds. Thyrfing is another band I've personally heard laughed at. Others include such bands as Kalmah and even Immortal. For some reason Death Metal seems to shut them the fuck up and quiet any laughter.

I personally have not heard any of those bands, but there have only been a handful of metal bands that I have ever laughed at. One way I look at it is "srew-em." My favorite band is Vanden Plas, yet I see people calling them "Vanden blah" etc. I try to spread the word about their greatness to as many people as possible, but some get it and some don't. The best thing to do is try to promote your favorite bands to as many people as possible and if they don't like them.... they don't like them. You can be sure someone out there will though.

Criticism is one thing, but incessant, unjustified laughter.... Maybe I'm over reacting.

Don't put yourself on their level of juvenile behavior. Occasionally I find myself lacking tolerance towards some people, but I try not to. The best way to handle ANY situation where people disagree with your taste is to ignore them and be proud that you dare to be an individual and listen to what YOU like.


Bryant
 
I disagree with the statement about everyone slowly getting into music. Most of the music that I'm into, I dug straight away. And that's ranging from Carcass to Hooverphonic to Johnny Cash to The Smashing Pumpkins to Ulver to Mr Bungle to Katatonia to Tatu to Bethlehem to Maudlin of the Well to A-ha to blah blah fucking blah.

I'm not a fan of genres, I'm a fan of whatever the fuck I like. Training yourself to like something is kinda dumb.
 
I hate those situations too.
The guys are close-minded as someone said here, you can't do nothing my friend...I don't think you over reacted, this is exactly what i would do in this case.You can see through that that this guy you are trying to put into metal, doesn't really give a shit for that and he just wants the chick and nothing more.I wouldn't continue the "metal lessons" with him...
You just calm down and let them say what they want, don't give a fuck for them.... :wave:
 
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I'm generally of the "I don't like this, but whatever floats your boat" opinion, except towards people who like truly crap pop music(like britney&co, every fucking boyband, and 80's pop like wham). I usually try to be open-minded and tolerant, but there are limits, I'm only human :)
 
Incendiare said:
Ignorance is pathetic. One time, I brought Dreaming Neon Black along with me and ten seconds into Beyond Within, this guy made a comment Nevermore sounds like Slipknot.

Bottom line, people are just ignorant, and if it's not played on the radio, they supposedly have the right to degrade it. In their minds the reason it's not played on the radio or advertised is because it isn't worthy of receiving attention in the mass media.
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:tickled: That's great! People that have never heard any true metal basically think it all sounds the same, which is unfathomable to me. I mean obviously all bands of a new genre sound the same the first time the first time you hear it. So those kinds of comments are usually made by those that are cole-minded.

In reference to what you said about people saying, "In their minds the reason it's not played on the radio or advertised is because it isn't worthy of receiving attention in the mass media."... My friend's brother said exactly that. He basically said, "well how can Dark Tranquillity be a good band if they don't get radio play? They must suck." I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the ignorance.
 
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Kill them both. It's the only way to truly rectify the situation. I know that once you get an initial reason (even if unfounded) to dislike a band, there will always be traces of that tainting the music for you. Even if you come to like or enjoy the music, there's still that lingering poison that disrupts your enjoyment; the intial dismissal and disliking of it. In fact, an unjustified disliking is the most tainted form of the disease. Kill them both, they will never like the music truly, and they mustn't spread the disease to those arround them. Make sure you dispose of the bodies properly also.
 
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First of all, I think many of the posts in this thread are really stupid, although I don't want to judge any of you or call you stupid, but saying stuff like
Closed-Mindedness is all it is. The sad fact is, you won't be able to get most people into metal, simply because they refuse to like it. Even if you put on the best thing they've ever heard, they'll probably shun it.
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is not the most clever I've ever heard, no offense though. I think Bryant's post was quite decent though!
Why is it that if you don't like something you're closeminded? I personally don't like drum n' bass. A friend of mine is a fanatic drum n' bass maniac, can't talk about anything else, can't listen to anything and basically it's his whole life. He arranges drum n' bass concerts (which is just dj's playing records though) and everytime I'm near him I hear some drum n' bass he's playing. I've heard millions of drum n' bass tracks and I guess some of it is okay, but not anything I would go out and buy or listen to if it was played on the radio (except for Dom & Roland's "Can't punish me", which I bought, played 5-10 times and then got tired of it). Some (or maybe I should say a lot) of it is terrible. A band like Bad Company (not the rock band) has made some of the worst crap I've ever heard!!!! I don't see why this makes me close minded. I bought that 12" I mentioned, so how can I be closeminded about drum n' bass? As I listen to almost any music genre that exists (or have existed), although mainly 60's & 70's stuff, I don't consider myself closeminded. Everybody knocks country music. Personally I have records by people like Bobby Bare, Billy Strange, Jack Blanchard & Misty Morgan, Waylon Jennings, Johnny Cash and my biggest idol Lee Hazlewood is a bit country as well, so I can't say that I'm closeminded. If I like it, I like it. As simple as that and it's the same with everybody else. If your friend thinks Winds sucks, he think it sucks!
There is another factor in this though and it's that chick. To me it seems that a lot of people consider music to be a part of their image and social status. If that chick laughs at Winds, your friend won't listen to it, 'cause they're laughable and pathetic and he would be too if he listened to them. Unfortunate, but that's apparently how the world is today. You got to be cool, hip, wear the right clothes and also listen to the right music (naked music has now taken the place that trip hop had a couple of years ago).
Some people are closeminded. Two people I know said "Type O Negative is the worst piece of crap" without never having listened to them. I then played it for them without saying what it was. One guy said "Hey, that was actually quite good" after I had played it to him and lent him "October rust". The other went out and bought all their cd's! But anyway, saying people are closeminded for not liking some piece of music is a load of shit. As I said previously; If they like it, they like it. If they don't, they don't! As simple as that!
 
Why is it that if you don't like something you're closeminded? I personally don't like drum n' bass. A friend of mine is a fanatic drum n' bass maniac, can't talk about anything else, can't listen to anything and basically it's his whole life. He arranges drum n' bass concerts (which is just dj's playing records though) and everytime I'm near him I hear some drum n' bass he's playing. I've heard millions of drum n' bass tracks and I guess some of it is okay, but not anything I would go out and buy or listen to if it was played on the radio (except for Dom & Roland's "Can't punish me", which I bought, played 5-10 times and then got tired of it). Some (or maybe I should say a lot) of it is terrible. A band like Bad Company (not the rock band) has made some of the worst crap I've ever heard!!!! I don't see why this makes me close minded.
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If you've given it a chance, and still dislike it, then I completely agree that you aren't closed-minded. But it sounds like these people didn't even give it a chance, or attempt to like it.


But anyway, saying people are closeminded for not liking some piece of music is a load of shit. As I said previously; If they like it, they like it. If they don't, they don't! As simple as that!
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I agree. What I said before still stands though. I didn't say that if they dislike it, they're closed-minded. I said that they shunned it without even giving it a chance. The fact that the girl laughed is ignorant, because she should be able to appreciate that the musicians are talented, whether they suit her tastes or not.
 
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Agreed. The word "ignorant" is often mistaken as 'to not like the same' rather than 'to not be aware of'. Example, I was called ignorant for simply not like Nirvana, even though I am perfectly aware of it. Whereas, if I had no clue about Nirvana, its stance or style, then that would be ignorance.
 
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