Bad Virus is Bad

[CliffBurton]

So, for about a week now, I've been plagued by this death virus, which seems to be much smarter than my computer and myself. Every search result I get in google is un-clickable, and just opens up a second window full of adds, and doesnt go to the link at all. Every page I load, I see it doing that bullshit re-direct crap to jump to adds before going to whatever page I typed in. Wost of all, I get the goddamn "Cannot Connect" page in Firefox about 70% of the time, sometimes being at all times, sometimes not happening all that much at all.

I have AVG Anti-virus and spyware, but they can't connect to update.

I downloaded Avis Anti-Virus, under Leandro's orders...But when its almost done installing, the computer just goes to deadly blue screen, and shuts down.

I tried doing searches in Safe-mode, and at first it found nothing.

Last thing that was suggested to me was to run a program called Smitrem, which is designed to clear out all the shit, but it needs to be run in Safe Mode, and my computer will not load Safe Mode.


I also find it odd, that I cant connect to the Smitrem website (friend had to bring it over on a USB drive), nor can I connect to the website of pretty much any popular anti-virus program.


Post Suggestions....
I'm currently asking around to borrow a portable drive so I can format, which I really don't want to do seeing as my friend made my computer, and something ALWAYS fucks up when formatting.

last time, he mixed up our mobo drivers, and I had the wrong one installed for about 4 months wondering why my sound was all fucked.

So post some help ideas.



tl;dr: You are a lazy cunt, the post wasn't even that long.

 

[Chamet]

Go to GeekstoGo and ask them. Every time I've had a problem they've been able to help.

 

[CliffBurton]

My virus doesn't approve of that website....

 

[Knarfi]

So get on another pc and ask it then ?

 

[Chamet]

My virus doesn't approve of that website....

Get a friend to do it for you. That's probably the best place you can go for help.

 

[CliffBurton]

So get on another pc and ask it then ?

Because there are geeks here, on a website I can access. My friends are busy writing up essays, so I'd rather not take up their computers, and internet cafe's smell like Mountain Dew and geeksweat.

 

[bobvex]

computer > window of a 57 story building > lands on a crippled old man.

 

[Undefined]

Does AVG know what the virus is called, post it and I'll google you up some solutions.

 

[Swabs]

Well that'll teach you for downloading porn from untrustworthy sites

 

[Achtland]

Buy an Apple computer.

 

[Undefined]

Apple is expensive as fuck, and basically a piece of shit.

 

[Swabs]

A piece of shit that can't be upgraded into a non-piece of shit either.

 

[CliffBurton]

Does AVG know what the virus is called, post it and I'll google you up some solutions.

AVG finds nothing, and yeah can't update.

Well that'll teach you for downloading porn from untrustworthy sites

I like to drink. Just because I blackout and make an ass of myself, doesn't mean I quit drinking.

Same goes for Viruses and Japanese porn.

Buy an Apple computer.

I don't by computers made for 8 year olds, marketed to people that think wearing a scarf in starbucks makes them cultured. Nor was my pron gayporn.

 

[innuenDO]

I tried doing searches in Safe-mode, and at first it found nothing.

Last thing that was suggested to me was to run a program called Smitrem, which is designed to clear out all the shit, but it needs to be run in Safe Mode, and my computer will not load Safe Mode.

Hmmmmm

At first: Safe your data. And save the aids. Save what you can't live without. and copy only things to your new computer that were scanned before on a malware free computer.

Hope it's not a root-kit! Otherwise BootCDs wont work.

Try Boot CDs like Ultimate Boot and or BartPE and use the inbuilt Maleware scans. Try HIjackthis and use the online tool or search the processes manually in google and fix them.
Delete what you find but note down the names. Google these names if you find one programm with Backdoor abilities in it say good-bye to your windows. Deleting backdoors is possible but it downloaded various other malware programs and bot clients so your computer is not yours anymore.

 

[CrazyChris576]

Apple is expensive as fuck, and basically a piece of shit.

A piece of shit that can't be upgraded into a non-piece of shit either.

I believe the description you're looking for is this:

 

[Knarfi]

Man, mac isnt so bad. At least its properly programmed unlike windows (not just vista, everything windows has ever made is shitty and unconsequently programmed).

 

[Swabs]

Man, mac isnt so bad. At least its properly programmed unlike windows (not just vista, everything windows has ever made is shitty and unconsequently programmed).

I seriously don't think "unconsequently" is a word...

Probably should be inconsequently.

 

[jmbullet]

Macs are good for music anyway, in all studios I've been to, they all use them, not PCs.

That, and my uncle is a professional programmer, and he swears only by apple now. He always says ''The only thing that microsoft could build that wouldn't suck is a vaccuum cleaner''

 

[Swabs]

Yeah that's because Logic is a great program, but Cubase is used by many, many professionals aswell, usually because they can always upgrade their PC if they find it can't handle ridiculous amounts of tracks at a time etc etc.

My friend (music student) has a Mac, one of the newest ones too with a Quad-Core processor, 8gb of RAM blablablabla, but Logic still crashes when he tries to work with 70+ tracks.

 

[Ensi]

Yeah that's because Logic is a great program, but Cubase is used by many, many professionals aswell, usually because they can always upgrade their PC if they find it can't handle ridiculous amounts of tracks at a time etc etc.

My friend (music student) has a Mac, one of the newest ones too with a Quad-Core processor, 8gb of RAM blablablabla, but Logic still crashes when he tries to work with 70+ tracks.

Who the fuck works with 70 tracks at a time?