divine_torture
leVel
That depends. Did you have a lot of free time or did you push aside other things for that purpose?
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The Emptier
t3h b3aSt0rZ
zabu of nΩd
Free Insultation
- Feb 9, 2007
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What about some of the pages not loading? Occasionally i can't get to some of the user-based pages like subscriptions and PMs for a few minutes/hours at a time.
Cronopio
Glorious Imperator
I actually had a lot of free time. But I also felt very motivated in tugging the ole python, so there's a bith of both going on there I think.
Blind Guardian
Member
I was wondering about that for a long time, actually. Eventually I just turned Avast off since I didn't have the ork to change any settings.
Cronopio
Glorious Imperator
Psychonaut
God Of Emptiness
divine_torture
leVel
Ha! And I think the downtime is the bigger reason. I'm jerking off as I type this. I did it twice since I started typing this. I need a sandwich now.
Dak
mentat
zabu of nΩd;10377746 said:
Sounds like major life re-orienting. Also sounds like the sort of direction taken by someone with a generous trust fund disbursement.
Zephyrus
Tyrants and Slaves
Einherjar86
Active Member
Master_Yoda77
Juggalo
Dak
mentat
Unless you live in Chicagoland, like I do. For me the drive to University of Iowa seems like an eternity.
Dak
mentat
zabu of nΩd;10378359 said:
Yeah, Zeph was just pining for "stimulation" in another thread
Einherjar86
Active Member
zabu of nΩd;10378415 said:I know right
Well if my existing social circle ends up being a deciding factor, then Boston, Chicago and NYC would probably be at the top of my list.
The Ozzman
Melted by feels
Krigloch the Furious
Pants full of poo
Zephyrus
Tyrants and Slaves
So I have completed my move to Iowa City and have the apartment almost entirely set up.
The past week has been absolute hell. I was at a staff party to celebrate the conclusion of my summer job last Thursday and got very drunk, during which I got excessively drunk. My boss then went ahead and started passing around a pipe and as it came my way, if I were in an uninhibited state, I would have passed. As I've said before, marijuana has had negative effects on my cognitive abilities that over time have manifested in my sober life (trouble concentrating, lack of motivation, disorganization, lack of empathy).
But I smoked it anyway, and immediately regretted it as I began sliding into a very paranoid high and watched my world going at a thousand miles an hour faster than my own mind. I thought I could sleep it off, and the next day the after-effects were there: slow mental reactions to external stimuli, and inability to concentrate deeply on any one thought. I thought it would go away the next day and I'd be back on my feet.
It didn't, and it was the day I had to pack up and leave for Iowa, to drive 1500 miles with my father over the course of three days. I got very little sleep during the trip and by the time we got to Chicago and started walking around Millennium Park, which was congested with people, I started freaking out. When we got to Iowa City the next day I was clearly collapsing in on myself.
To make a long story short, my intellectual problems did not go away, and combined with the lack of sleep and physical and psychological stress of moving to a completely new environment, which caused me utter existential terror of failing out of graduate school right at the start, turned into a perfect storm that catapulted me into a severe depression.
It got to the point where yesterday I could barely communicate with other people, because my mind had gone completely blank or had been playing the same thoughts or song lyrics over and over like a broken record. I started seizing and having shortness of breath.
Thank Hermes I had a traveling companion in the form of my father, who helped me move and gave me pep talks about how he himself experienced similar episodes in his life, and that it would appear that Generalized Anxiety Disorder has finally gone from genotype to phenotype in me. I also came out to him about the history of my pot usage, which he was extremely cool about since he had very similar experiences with it when he did it all the time in the 70's. He gave me some Xanax to hold me over till I see a doctor (hopefully tomorrow) who can prescribe me something more longterm and effective.
I'm also hoping that some of these mental issues correlate to some residual THC left in my brain from that fateful party last week. Been drinking lots of cranberry juice and taking Niacin pills to help clear that out.
I have five days to put my mind back together before orientations begin for the Classics Department and TAing etc. I have a hard row to hoe here, but need to stay positive, stay active, eat healthy, stay hydrated, get my bearings in this new town, and focus on the essentials of what's soon to come academically: brushing up on my Greek & Latin for diagnostic exams, and getting familiar with my Rhetoric textbook in order to prepare a syllabus by the end of next week.
I also plan to take up some meditative practices and begin attending the local Orthodox church. I've been getting into Orthodoxy for academic purposes, but I'm now beginning to see a more personal utility beyond its connections to Late Antiquity and Greek philosophy.
Cliffs: got fucked up at a party just before moving to Iowa. Recovering from major psychiatric episode resulting therefrom. Hopefully OK by next week when academic shit hits the fan.
The past week has been absolute hell. I was at a staff party to celebrate the conclusion of my summer job last Thursday and got very drunk, during which I got excessively drunk. My boss then went ahead and started passing around a pipe and as it came my way, if I were in an uninhibited state, I would have passed. As I've said before, marijuana has had negative effects on my cognitive abilities that over time have manifested in my sober life (trouble concentrating, lack of motivation, disorganization, lack of empathy).
But I smoked it anyway, and immediately regretted it as I began sliding into a very paranoid high and watched my world going at a thousand miles an hour faster than my own mind. I thought I could sleep it off, and the next day the after-effects were there: slow mental reactions to external stimuli, and inability to concentrate deeply on any one thought. I thought it would go away the next day and I'd be back on my feet.
It didn't, and it was the day I had to pack up and leave for Iowa, to drive 1500 miles with my father over the course of three days. I got very little sleep during the trip and by the time we got to Chicago and started walking around Millennium Park, which was congested with people, I started freaking out. When we got to Iowa City the next day I was clearly collapsing in on myself.
To make a long story short, my intellectual problems did not go away, and combined with the lack of sleep and physical and psychological stress of moving to a completely new environment, which caused me utter existential terror of failing out of graduate school right at the start, turned into a perfect storm that catapulted me into a severe depression.
It got to the point where yesterday I could barely communicate with other people, because my mind had gone completely blank or had been playing the same thoughts or song lyrics over and over like a broken record. I started seizing and having shortness of breath.
Thank Hermes I had a traveling companion in the form of my father, who helped me move and gave me pep talks about how he himself experienced similar episodes in his life, and that it would appear that Generalized Anxiety Disorder has finally gone from genotype to phenotype in me. I also came out to him about the history of my pot usage, which he was extremely cool about since he had very similar experiences with it when he did it all the time in the 70's. He gave me some Xanax to hold me over till I see a doctor (hopefully tomorrow) who can prescribe me something more longterm and effective.
I'm also hoping that some of these mental issues correlate to some residual THC left in my brain from that fateful party last week. Been drinking lots of cranberry juice and taking Niacin pills to help clear that out.
I have five days to put my mind back together before orientations begin for the Classics Department and TAing etc. I have a hard row to hoe here, but need to stay positive, stay active, eat healthy, stay hydrated, get my bearings in this new town, and focus on the essentials of what's soon to come academically: brushing up on my Greek & Latin for diagnostic exams, and getting familiar with my Rhetoric textbook in order to prepare a syllabus by the end of next week.
I also plan to take up some meditative practices and begin attending the local Orthodox church. I've been getting into Orthodoxy for academic purposes, but I'm now beginning to see a more personal utility beyond its connections to Late Antiquity and Greek philosophy.
Cliffs: got fucked up at a party just before moving to Iowa. Recovering from major psychiatric episode resulting therefrom. Hopefully OK by next week when academic shit hits the fan.
