New Social Thread

Honestly, it's because his daddy pays for everything and Zeph is a sheltered little white kid deep down inside and now it's all crumbling apart now that he's away from home. Remember all that tourist shit? Some people grow up late.
 
That is absolutely right, rms, and this was bound to happen. I basically have to learn and relearn how to deal with real life. If I had the cognitive faculties to work my way through this adversity, I would meet the challenge and keep the TAship.

The irony of this is it's a result of living a degenerate and immoderate life yet professing to be a scholar of classical philosophy. Hardly.

It looks like I'll be withdrawing from the teaching and restrategizing finances to pay for the year, probably with loans and a part-time job. The Rhetoric people said they would try to guarantee a position for me next year for when I've recovered. Not a great situation, but it's far better than giving up and losing all hope of attaining my professional goals.
 
What? Plenty of people balance lots of book learning and academic pursuits or challenging jobs with regular vices and don't exercise moderation in much.

I think you have an anxiety disorder personally. Most people undergo this but can still function.
 
I really don't think that Zeph has an anxiety disorder, - To be completely honest, I would question whether or not 95% of people with that diagnosis really have a "real" problem - when reality hits late, it hits hard. I had a comparable break down when I turned 18 thanks to a slap of reality in the face. It was followed by an emotional whirlwind that worked in a consistent and unbreakable cycle that went in the order of extremely angry, massively depressed, feeling suicidal, blank, oddly happy, and then back again. This cycle would take anywhere around a day to go full circle, or an hour. That lasted for probably 6 months and then I got over it. *first world problems

In short, just give it time and don't blame your problems on genetics or chemical imbalances in your brain, unless of course you actually have a real problem.
 
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I really don't think that Zeph has an anxiety disorder, - To be completely honest, I would question whether or not 95% of people with that diagnosis really have a "real" problem - when reality hits late, it hits hard. I had a comparable break down when I turned 18 thanks to a slap of reality in the face. It was followed by an emotional whirlwind that worked in a consistent and unbreakable cycle that went in the order of extremely angry, massively depressed, feeling suicidal, blank, oddly happy, and then back again. This cycle would take anywhere around a day to go full circle, or an hour. That lasted for probably 6 months and then I got over it. *first world problems

In short, just give it time and don't blame your problems on genetics or chemical imbalances in your brain, unless of course you actually have a real problem.

You know, I've considered myself sort of a skeptic about anxiety too, but some cases involving random panic attacks and people not being able to leave their homes/being totally agoraphobic in social situations make me rethink my skepticism. I've had the kinds of volatile emotional episodes you mention - but I guess it was never SO BAD that I couldn't go to work or anything like that. I just listened to Sopor Aeternus all the time and spent all my free time sleeping and running to try and evade the negative feelings that bore down on me.

I guess I'll rescind my hasty internet doctor diagnosis for now. I'm probably a sociopath because I'm so hesitant to believe and/or empathize with people who actually can't function according to the "one size fits all" societal model of work-play-sleep-repeat-until-death.
 
Yeah, you're right. Drinking is a temporary fix and much too easy. Ever think about hiking? I mean we all know the benefits of exercise but being outside in a natural setting seems to be really restorative in an existential sorta way.

hell yeah. hiking in nature is very relaxing and calming
 
All the symptoms listed are also well-known physical manifestations of stress and anxiety associated with making major life changes. Good luck...
 
does anyone other than me think it's weird how this "social thread" somehow turned into a "social disorder" thread :err:
 
OK it's not meningitis, but they're putting in a referral to the neurology department to perhaps look more into the cognitive issues. I guess this whole episode is making me freak out too much and leading me to draw irrational conclusions to explain my problem. I guess it's back to therapy and waiting for the antidepressants to start working their magic.

A lot of this also is existential terror. If I can't think deeply and critically anymore, nor be able to learn new skills, my career in academia is over. But I need to stop being so impatient and let time heal.

I also need to stop using this forum as a sounding wall for my issues.
 
A lot of this also is existential terror. If I can't think deeply and critically anymore, nor be able to learn new skills, my career in academia is over. But I need to stop being so impatient and let time heal.

Nah, bro. You are among the smartest people I've ever known and just because you are going through personal shit at this time doesn't mean your career is totally fucked. Give it time, take another year or something, focus, get your shit together, and fuck some slutz in the department in their ears.
 
I signed up for three classes. 2 Greek, 1 Latin, high intensity. After meeting with a psychiatrist yesterday she was optimistic I'd get my powers back in due time. I hope she's right. Christ, this is sounding like some cheesy superhero drama.
 
Zeph, I'll give it to you straight. I've seen many family members die. I've walked in on 2 friend's bodies after suicide. I've seen people shot. I've done heroin, meth, cocaine. I've been a drug dealer, car theif, dad (still am), and boyfriend. I've had my son taken. I've lost girls I love more than life itself. I've moved from Illinois to Denver, then recently back again. I've stopped drugs. I've quit drinking. I've picked them back up. I'm currently drug free. I've been beat up and had my skull cracked. I've been homeless, bought a house, had to steal rides in a pinch breaking the law, owned cars. I've run with 1%er clubs, street gangs, skinheads, prison gang members, been to jail, had jobs, paid bills, been heartbroken, left my family behind, lost my friends, hurt people, abused people...You cannot at all say you have done anything I haven't. Period.

MAN THE FUCK UP BROTHER! It's all you being a pansy in the head, honestly. Deal with life, get over it, do well like you know damn well you can. You are smarter than really almost anyone any of us know, so start acting like it.