Zephyrus
Tyrants and Slaves
So for the first time in my life today I broke down sobbing, uncontrollably, for a good 45 minutes. It happened after I popped a Klonopin and started reading Plotinus.
As a classicist, I should have taken greater heed every time I saw the word pharmakon, such as the drugs Circe used to turn Odysseus' men into pigs, or the pharmakon of the art of writing that Thoth gave to the Pharaoh in the story told in Plato's Phaedrus.
Never has a more incompatible union occurred than that between psyche (soul/mind) and iatros (doctor). Psychiatrists will throw whatever drugs at you they can without remotely understanding your problems, especially when those problems are self-induced illusions.
The poison cannot be the antidote in this situation. The THC that plunged me into cognitive chaos cannot be returned to an ordered cosmos by the infusion of SSRI's and benzo's. In fact, the ADHD med's I was put on in addition have done nothing but drive my anxiety through the roof. I'm reducing the dose, but may switch to Ritalin since my research finds much less of a correlation between Ritalin and anxiety (where as the inverse is true with Concerta). If that doesn't work, it's time I take you guys' advice, man up, and deal with it on my own.
I have evidence that getting off the meds may work. Two weekends ago I visited Schmidt and Bleull, in a brief interval between stopping an SSRI and starting the Concerta. Those two will recall how much of a philosopher they called me that weekend. The social stimulation, the alcoholic lubrication, and the absence of medication were the cause of that.
As a classicist, I should have taken greater heed every time I saw the word pharmakon, such as the drugs Circe used to turn Odysseus' men into pigs, or the pharmakon of the art of writing that Thoth gave to the Pharaoh in the story told in Plato's Phaedrus.
Never has a more incompatible union occurred than that between psyche (soul/mind) and iatros (doctor). Psychiatrists will throw whatever drugs at you they can without remotely understanding your problems, especially when those problems are self-induced illusions.
The poison cannot be the antidote in this situation. The THC that plunged me into cognitive chaos cannot be returned to an ordered cosmos by the infusion of SSRI's and benzo's. In fact, the ADHD med's I was put on in addition have done nothing but drive my anxiety through the roof. I'm reducing the dose, but may switch to Ritalin since my research finds much less of a correlation between Ritalin and anxiety (where as the inverse is true with Concerta). If that doesn't work, it's time I take you guys' advice, man up, and deal with it on my own.
I have evidence that getting off the meds may work. Two weekends ago I visited Schmidt and Bleull, in a brief interval between stopping an SSRI and starting the Concerta. Those two will recall how much of a philosopher they called me that weekend. The social stimulation, the alcoholic lubrication, and the absence of medication were the cause of that.
