The definite, new "How Do You Feel" Thread

[TheFourthHorseman]

FourthHorseman: Haha... you know, listening to depressive music when i'm depressed makes me feel better, not worse.

It was, sort of, a joke.

Anyway, what about the way i write don't you like and why do you want to --symbolically-- slam yourself on the forehead?

I'm not sure if I can describe it any better than I already did. Too wordy, too gothic, too cliched.

 

[solefald]

but don't stop listening to entwine. i like entwine. just realize their lyrics are utter shit.

 

[Hitori]

@undocontrol
no, i'm graduating from university, i studied spanish literature. as for your xanga- i think (i may be wrong) what rahvin and TFH are trying to say is that you write in an overly dramatic gothic suffering cliched way. i think it's probably due to the fact that you are overly ambiguous and you indulge in fragmented sentences, along with the abundance of words like "failure" "emptiness" "i'm dying" "solitude" "beautiful pain" "crystal loneliness" coupled with phrases like "tell me this isn't happening to me" etc.

but anyway, from what i read of your comments, your readers enjoy it, so if it works for you that's all that should matter. sorry if i got carried away with my criticism, at uni we get trained to (try to) shred every text to pieces

nf: hungry

 

[Hiljainen]

Hiljainen... ...you make me sad... I thought my 1minute was a record time

eheh, i always win when it comes to worse records

sorry for the late reply, the last time i've been here i had little time and i haven't been home for 2 weeks.
you don't sound melodramatic to me this was usual some months ago, like a sort of cyclic bad feeling, now it happens just sometimes if i'm tired/too worried about something/thinking about how hard it will be to find a job after uni thus i consider it normal as it is now.
and yes, i feel silly, i'm 20, and i do sound like a 14 years old often

NF: ok, i had my second exam of the semester and i did fairly well, like last time, fairly upping my average grade
i should restart to practice more english though, it's getting horrible and all mixed with italian lately.

 

[Magrathean]

the prose has lost its focus, you're tying words together in an overdone stream of consciousness.

Well, it's just my stream of thought, nothing more, so it's kind of obvious that it's going to lose its focus; streams of thought are like that, they jump around chaotically without getting anywhere (most of the time). And the "overdone stream of consciousness" could be due to my excessive obsession (yes, i tend to become obsessed with just about anything, though i'm trying to change that just a bit).

but don't stop listening to entwine. i like entwine. just realize their lyrics are utter shit.

I was thinking about that yesterday. They're one of my favorite bands, and i just love the rapture i feel when listening to their music, but if you analyze their lyrics they're nothing compared to Tranquillity (in the sense that they're simple and easy to understand) and most (not all) of them are "i love/need you" crap.

I'm not sure if I can describe it any better than I already did. Too wordy, too gothic, too cliched.

"Wordy"? Yes, i enjoy writing like i do. "Gothic"? In what sense? I don't think i write in "goth" style, if that's what you mean. And if you mean "dark" and "depressive" then yes, i do write like that, and, once again, i enjoy it. "Cliched"? Could you be more specific? And, at that, do you even understand what's being said? (Not to be taken as an insult, but rather i don't believe it's that easy to understand without knowing the whole background to what i write, i.e. the things i've gone through.)

as for your xanga- i think (i may be wrong) what rahvin and TFH are trying to say is that you write in an overly dramatic gothic suffering cliched way. i think it's probably due to the fact that you are overly ambiguous and you indulge in fragmented sentences, along with the abundance of words like "failure" "emptiness" "i'm dying" "solitude" "beautiful pain" "crystal loneliness" coupled with phrases like "tell me this isn't happening to me" etc.

Okay, okay, "i'm dying" and "tell me this isn't happening" may be cliche, i admit it. But the rest isn't! Nah, thanks for clarifying that for me (if indeed they mean that). But isn't being overly ambiguous (and i believe the fragmented sentences add to the ambiguousness) what Dark Tranquillity, for example, does? Not that i'm trying to compare myself with them (Mikael and i write totally different stuff), but i don't think being ambiguous is that bad. At any rate, it's much better than writing literally: "yesterday i hanged out with my friend jamie and he reminded me of my lindsey and how much i miss her and i felt very very bad (insert smilie here)".

but anyway, from what i read of your comments, your readers enjoy it, so if it works for you that's all that should matter.

I actually write for myself, not for my readers. But if they enjoy it it's cool, it's a way to meet people with similar interests as me. And yes, that's all that matters.

Anyway, let's not turn this thread into a "what do you think about Undo's writings?" one (although you guys could start one if you wish ).

...at uni we get trained to (try to) shred every text to pieces

No hard feelings, man, don't worry. =)

no, i'm graduating from university, i studied spanish literature.

So, anyway, you said you didn't know what to do after you graduated. Something in the direction of being a writer or a critic sounds too obvious, so i assume you don't want to be either. What was your plan when you started your career?

 

[Siren]

LOL. You mean you don't want a relationship right now besides the guy you're marrying.

oops, yeah.

Been there. Believe me, when they become annoying and yet you don't want to hurt them it turns into a nightmare.

thanks for saying this, you might save me from some trouble.
the problem is that i'm already starting to feel like i'm getting into that situation and i don't know how to handle it. it's not like i'm doing anything in particular to send all the wrong messages, and i'm in a disadvantaged position anyway.

I could tell you the whole story if you care to listen to it. Still, wise words. I'll try not to.. but usually frustration and obsession get ahold of me and it's really hard for me to break loose.

if you want to tell i'll listen. you can post it here or pm me, whichever you prefer.
i know it's hard to break loose, but you have to do it before it gets worse. then it will only be harder. i'm talking from experience. if you have to learn from experience, learn from mine, don't make it yours.

 

[Hitori]

So, anyway, you said you didn't know what to do after you graduated. Something in the direction of being a writer or a critic sounds too obvious, so i assume you don't want to be either. What was your plan when you started your career?

i don't have the discipline or talent to be a writer, and being a critic and leeching is something i wouldn't enjoy. i didn't have any plan when i started, really. at the moment i don't want to do anything at all. maybe wander around the world in a gypsy-hippiesh way? sit in a lonely secluded place and play WoW all day? be an aristocrat and do nothing?

those sound good

 

[Magrathean]

Siren: I'll pm you the answer to that.

Hitori: Too bad they don't pay you for doing that. =(

 

[TheFourthHorseman]

"Wordy"? Yes, i enjoy writing like i do. "Gothic"? In what sense? I don't think i write in "goth" style, if that's what you mean. And if you mean "dark" and "depressive" then yes, i do write like that, and, once again, i enjoy it. "Cliched"? Could you be more specific? And, at that, do you even understand what's being said? (Not to be taken as an insult, but rather i don't believe it's that easy to understand without knowing the whole background to what i write, i.e. the things i've gone through.)

Gothic was not a good word to describe it I suppose. I'm not well-versed in literature, but I would guess that your writing doesn't resemble the gothic style of writing. The attitude of the writing is why I called it such, it reminded me pretty much of the attitudes of mall-goths with their fashionable depression, with the difference of the complicated style.
Which brings me to the wordy aspects of your writing. Nothing wrong with being wordy, but when the writing is bad I guess writing less would mean that it's less bad. Maybe not. It could just be that the 'fragmented sentences' thing that Hitori mentioned bugs me, but I'm not too hasty to quote others on this since it might just lead to me saying what I don't necessarily mean. But I can't say I like it...fragmented sentences, in my view, should be used to imply a mysterious atmosphere, but I don't feel such an atmosphere in your writing.
And no, I couldn't be bothered to be more specific, really. Couldn't find the words. Just a lot of phrases and words that I've grown tired of.

 

[Magrathean]

FourthHorseman: Thanks for explaining your point. It's okay with me that you don't like it, i do appreciate criticism --be it negative or positive--, and besides everyone has their own tastes and i understand that not everyone can like what i write or the way i write it.

 

[La Rocque]

Pretty f'n good as my chiropractor finally got my back, back to where it should be -

 

[hyena]

oh, oh, a fight, how cool

nf: locally blissful. i am enjoying a moment of perfect harmony with exchange rate markets. i love stuff that makes me about 1k happier in a few days, just because i'm, you know, smart.

rammstein - feuer und wasser

 

[Dafne]

you know, listening to depressive music when i'm depressed makes me feel better, not worse

OMG i'm exactly opposite!!!
A friend of mine is like you...she says she likes to "cuddle" her sadness...
Instead when I feel sadness within me I (try to) fight it back with all the strength I have, and I listen to music with no idea of sadness, gothic tones and stuff...smth like The Haunted (Trespass i.e.). And it works, on a certain threshold of course!!!
And I think that the more you dig yourself into negative mood the more you become depressed. Sometimes we must FORCE ourselves to "turn the mind off" and fill our life with positive things to do, instead of filling it with negative thoughts.

 

[Magrathean]

Hyena: Good to know. =)

Dafne: You know, if i'm down and i'm listening to "happy" (or non-depressive) music i think "this shit isn't realistic, in reality life sucks" (and then you die, yes), so i end up in a worse mood than before. Instead, listening to depressive music helps me let out part of the pain (in a similar way that writing does). Besides, i believe that running away from your problems and then coming back (i.e. "turning your mind off" for a while) only results in whatever problem you had becoming bigger -- and you still not having found the solution. I'd bet your friend thinks in a similar way. Now, after that explanation, is it still that strange that your friend and i listen to depressive music when we're depressed? =)

 

[hyena]

nf: gothic. also a bit stupid about being gothic.

 

[solefald]

nf:gothic 2(nice word for feelings hyena.well done)my girlfriend decided to change our relationship into bullshit.now Im officially degraded to the best friend who has all her trust and knows most about her and her feelings and shit like that. I know more about her life and emotions than the new guy who gives her I dont know what.thanks for backstabbing lady. she says she still trusts me but shoot me into the face.strange world

 

[marduk1507]

@sole: you just have to get over the fact that most women have absolutely no idea of what they want. That other guy isnt giving her anything, cause she knows shit about what hes supposed to give her. Women are excellent "dumpers", just when it starts to get serious and you are hooked, they back out of it and move to someone else. There are of course few exceptions and most of the ones I "know" are from this forum (not that it would make them any happier ), but on the whole its hopeless. Its not that there isnt anything, but they are too lazy/dumb/whatever to try and dig it out, to know more about themselves.

nf: quite upset, as you might have guessed from the rant above. Pretty tired of trying to find out whats wrong with my wife (I was gentle, no worries, but to no avail), she just usually turns into a dummy and wouldnt say a fucking word. And I am suddenly scared there isnt really anything to say. And what makes me fucking mad is that instead of trying to think about it she becomes pontifical, like Im the one whos not ok. Oh well...

 

[Dafne]

Dafne: You know, if i'm down and i'm listening to "happy" (or non-depressive) music i think "this shit isn't realistic, in reality life sucks" (and then you die, yes), so i end up in a worse mood than before.

Oh yeeeeeeeeeees i perfectly catch what you mean and i do the same, it's a further pain when you hear "happy" music if you are down... But different from you and my friend I need to "find a light somewhere in the dark" and so I need to listen to music that in a way pushes me to react not to watch more and more into deep pain...

Besides, i believe that running away from your problems and then coming back (i.e. "turning your mind off" for a while) only results in whatever problem you had becoming bigger -- and you still not having found the solution. I'd bet your friend thinks in a similar way. Now, after that explanation, is it still that strange that your friend and i listen to depressive music when we're depressed? =)

Hum.. I think sometimes "to turn my mind off" helps me to be less under pressure...and usually it is playing music that helps me alot! :Spin:
and no i didn't find strange yr attitude, but just different...

 

[Dafne]

nf:gothic 2(nice word for feelings hyena.well done)my girlfriend decided to change our relationship into bullshit.now Im officially degraded to the best friend who has all her trust and knows most about her and her feelings and shit like that. I know more about her life and emotions than the new guy who gives her I dont know what.thanks for backstabbing lady. she says she still trusts me but shoot me into the face.strange world

oh damn so bad to hear that...really... and if i am allowed to say a thing, well don't let her using you!!! Unfortunately the world is full of such bastards (males, females, young, old...) who use persons and just think to theirselves, so selfish... I mean, if you want her friendship too, it's ok but don't allow her to let you suffer
@marduk: i thought in 2005 these talks about women vs men were "trespassed"... have you ever heard about men acting that way? huh, TONS AND TONS!!!

 

[fireangel]

s.

nf: quite upset, as you might have guessed from the rant above. Pretty tired of trying to find out whats wrong with my wife (I was gentle, no worries, but to no avail), she just usually turns into a dummy and wouldnt say a fucking word. And I am suddenly scared there isnt really anything to say. And what makes me fucking mad is that instead of trying to think about it she becomes pontifical, like Im the one whos not ok. Oh well...

I thought your wife was the best wife ever for you
Well, try to keep that in mind Some people really might not feel talkactive when they are dwelling on their problems. It can also be hard to admit some things about oneself, even if it would be to her own husband, like someone wouldn´t talk about a problem because she thinks it´s her own fault or inherent behaviour that could not be changed, so she´d see no point in discussing.
But still you can try to make clear to her that you wouldn´t like the role reversal-trick when you ask about her and she´d say that you are the one with the problem. Just tell that nicely. Might be just some "blocking strategy" related to what I explained before.
Maybe when this phase is over and everything is getting better again, you can try to find out why this happens once in a while and that you would really like to support her then.

And I don´t think that most women "don´t know what they want" ;D