Rapture - Someone (I Don't Know)
edit: i don't know if the song is about suicide, to me its depressing and beautiful.
You refuse to take pills for it, and listen to depressive music, and ENJOY feeling miserable?
Maybe that's why you always feel depressed.....?
You say you're getting married too? Well a)does she know you like feeling miserable and b)if you think you're miserable NOW wait till you're married!
Listen to some DLR-era Van Halen people!
(And yes, I was diagnosed with clinical depression too, years ago so I do know what I'm talking about)
Standing on a crossfit machine makes me depressed. There's nothing worse than exercise. but well, it helps me pick up chicks and in the end it's probably worth it.