New Social Thread

[Vimana]

We are social predators that evolved in grasslands and we now live in giant groups, so it makes sense.

I think most societal problems are within child development, though. Problems like obeying without question, I think, are initially developed in a child's relationship with their parents. It's kind of fucked up how society is in that respect. Children grow up thinking adults know all the answers because they're adults, then when they become an adult, they realize that adults are making it up as they go along.

 

[Dak]

Children grow up thinking adults know all the answers because they're adults, then when they become an adult, they realize that adults are making it up as they go along.

Yeah, I already knew this, but the reality hit hard once I became a parent.

 

[Vimana]

I hope you tell your kids this. I think it's fucked up how parents would rather be more of a dictator than an assistant in helping someone grow up. There's a reason making friends is so important in development. It frees people from the ruler-citizen dichotomy children make with their parents. Parents act like it's a loss of power and influence on their kids, when trying to be a dictator is where they lose it. It's not like friends can't help each other get back into shape if things are bad or impose restrictions for beneficial reasons. I don't see why it's so messed up for a parent to be their child's friend, other than "that's not what a parent is supposed to be."

 

[Dak]

I hope you tell your kids this. I think it's fucked up how parents would rather be more of a dictator than an assistant in helping someone grow up. There's a reason making friends is so important in development. It frees people from the ruler-citizen dichotomy children make with their parents. Parents act like it's a loss of power and influence on their kids, when trying to be a dictator is where they lose it. It's not like friends can't help each other get back into shape if things are bad or impose restrictions for beneficial reasons. I don't see why it's so messed up for a parent to be their child's friend, other than "that's not what a parent is supposed to be."

I intend to when they reach school age. The problem with the "Friend approach" is when you attempt to be an "equal", which leads to problems when you have to renege and take the power position if the child creates problems. As long as the child is living under the roof/eating the food/etc you pay for, there is still a certain line he or she has to toe. This in itself is a valuable lesson for later on in the work force, whether they are self employed or not. Those who pay the bills make the rules. A big disservice some parents do their children is hiding all the normal financial ins and outs of life from them. Separately,l I've already spent thousands on my kids and they don't even know it, plus the various other personal options and opportunities forgone for their benefit. At this point I would like to give my much younger self a kick in the head for not understanding this stuff due to my response to my own parents. On the flip side, my own parents were probably stereotypically poor at explaining the situation.

 

[Vimana]

I still think power can be used in the friend approach. A more experienced friend can still make rules for a less experienced friend in a situation.

 

[monoxide_child]

The psychiatric care system is a joke for the most part. I find it pretty sick how with the money that can be made off of throwing pills at people, systems will be put in place to keep people depressed. Many people I was in the psych hospital with weren't there for the first time, and it was easy to see why when it was all about pills and group therapy would spend about ten minutes per person per day. Better than nothing, but still. It was clear they gave shit the bare minimum, because if people weren't mentally ill, they'd have less business. I quit that and they gave me this condescending "we can only help you if you want to help yourself" thing, as if spending six hours a day listening to junkies talking about relapsing and only getting ten minutes to talk about problems that built up over years was some kind of godsend.

does one-on-one therapy work better than the group therapy?

 

[Einherjar86]

All term papers handed in except for one, which isn't due until Friday, and I only have to write the conclusion. Already got an 'A' back on my Chaucer paper, so I'm taking an hour to celebrate. Heated up some mead and playing Skyrim; I haven't turned this game on since early September.

 

[Cronopio]

I've got a grammar exam this coming Saturday, and on the 12:th of January there is the exam in Dutch literature through the ages. Should be fun. Also, there are two books to be read during the break ...

 

[Einherjar86]

We are social predators that evolved in grasslands and we now live in giant groups, so it makes sense.

I think most societal problems are within child development, though.

Which is what Freud illuminated for us, honestly. This is why the complete denunciation of Freud in modern psych classes is way off-base. He wasn't right about everything, but without his work we would still have a horrifyingly Victorian, "normative" view of culture.

 

[Einherjar86]

Well, final paper is almost done; just need to proofread a few more times.

Bought myself a bottle of JW Black Label to celebrate.

 

[viewerfromnihil]

My GPA is just a hair under 3.5 thanks to an English Literature course. Fuck. I wasn't able to get above a C on even one paper with this professor.

Bought myself a bottle of JW Black Label to celebrate.

Great choice!

 

[Draehl]

Got me a Glenfiddich 12 yr the other day. Not bad for a single malt at $30.00 it does have a sort of bitter pear bite to it as advertised. My next purchase will be Balvenie Doublewood that a good friend keeps recommending, a little more expensive, but we'll see. Bang for your buck though I love Wild Turkey 101. Easy to drink, maybe a little plain, but enjoyable. With scotch you really have to want it, but bourbon always works.

 

[monoxide_child]

Freud wasn't right about everything

there are those who say Freud wasn't right about anything

 

[Zephyrus]

He was right about himself, at least. He just thought everyone else was secretly as fucked up as he was.

 

[monoxide_child]

He was right about himself, at least. He just thought everyone else was secretly as fucked up as he was.

that makes sense
he was using himself as a template because he so completely deviated from what the psychologists before him called "normal"

 

[Einherjar86]

there are those who say Freud wasn't right about anything

We call those people "wrong."

 

[monoxide_child]

that makes sense
he was using himself as a template because he so completely deviated from what the psychologists before him called "normal"

using yourself as a template doesn't work

using myself as a template for example
one could argue that the men who fuck "supermodels" are secretly attracted to "whooty models" and that they are all being masochistic

my sexual atraction to females older than myself could be used to say that all females are secretly cougars and that female teachers having sex with highschool students is totally "normal"

of course a modern person would instantly know that those 2 ideas are totally bullshit, but people alive when Freud published his work, those people actually believed him,
they believed him because they no longer believed the previously existing model of the mind and he filled a void of giving people something contradictory to believe in

this is like the modern-day blue-eyed-blonde Americans that suddenly become Muslim because they suddenly realize that Christianity is totally bullshit

 

[Einherjar86]

using yourself as a template doesn't work

using myself as a template for example
one could argue that the men who fuck "supermodels" are secretly attracted to "whooty models" and that they are all being masochistic

my sexual atraction to females older than myself could be used to say that all females are secretly cougars and that female teachers having sex with highschool students is totally "normal"

of course a modern person would instantly know that those 2 ideas are totally bullshit, but people alive when Freud published his work, those people actually believed him,
they believed him because they no longer believed the previously existing model of the mind and he filled a void of giving people something contradictory to believe in

this is like the modern-day blue-eyed-blonde Americans that suddenly become Muslim because they suddenly realize that Christianity is totally bullshit

Most people didn't believe Freud when he was publishing. He was busy shattering the prudish Victorian mentality of normativity, and most people didn't like that. It wasn't until the High Modernists got a hold of him and WWI wreaked havoc all over the globe that Freudian analysis began to sink in, and only then in academia really.

 

[monoxide_child]

using yourself as a template doesn't work

using myself as a template for example
one could argue that the men who fuck "supermodels" are secretly attracted to "whooty models" and that they are all being masochistic

my sexual atraction to females older than myself could be used to say that all females are secretly cougars and that female teachers having sex with highschool students is totally "normal"

of course a sane person would instantly know that those 2 ideas are totally bullshit, but there are a few crazy people alive today that firmly believe in every thin Freud said

these people are like the modern-day blue-eyed-blonde Americans that suddenly become Muslim because they suddenly realize that Christianity is totally bullshit

.

 

[Zephyrus]

Do you have conversations with yourself in real life?