The definite, new "How Do You Feel" Thread

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That's something I understand really good, it doesn't sound stupid.

I don't know the exact situation but (in general) it seems that having someone around you all the time is something you can't stand. Now you say that "I am not at all ready for being so close to someone". In combination with the fact that you need time for yourself just think about a possible future. If you let him even closer, he may want even more of you time.

Just my suggestion. But think about it. I made the mistake once that a person came into my life too fast and I regret it. This has to take time to develop, otherwise - especially in your case - it may cause serious problems.

EDIT: I hope I didn't come too close (to your feelings or personality). Just trying to give one or 2 points to think about.
 
ah thanx, yeah I guess its true, it goes too fast and I am already not a person that is used to have someone around me, so this makes it even more difficult, I didnt see it coming, it just happened but I feel sooo trapped in this now, I feel I cant breathe anymore, cant move anymore, its stressing me so much, I am not ready for something new right now, I think I should talk to him... I guess I am still too afraid after all that happened in the last year and it needs time to recover from some bad stories, I cant always throw myself in new things without even letting the scars heal...
 
DragonLady1 said:
there is someone who suddenly bumped into my life, really great person but I am not at all ready for being so close to someone and having him around me all the time, I need time to rest, time for myself, time to think about the situation with him and what my feelings are, time for clear thoughts and time for sleep... this starts to be bad for me as it goes on, I'm not used to it and I doubt I will get used to it in the next times :( I know it sounds stupid, but its all going too fast for me, it usually needs a lot of time, where I can rest and understand my feelings and emotions....
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o_O Stop living the same life as me!!! :p

Seriously though, I'm in an almost identical predicament. I told this girl that Im not ready and I don't know when I will be, but she feels like we are going steady kind of... Even though she lives in London ( :Smug: ) she is convinced we could work. She came to Leeds the other day, just to see me, and I was a boring turd as usual. It was a long slow day... although I enjoyed her company. Now she's texting me all the time, and emailing me, and all over IM... At first I was flattered, but now I'm being scared. I want to tell her that I don't want this, but I don't want to hurt her feelings at all... I feel totally guilty though, as I have lead her in really close to me, for some ungodly reason. I think It's because I knew it was something she wanted me to do, and I didn't want to dissapoint her. It's unusual that flirting over the internet turns into anything... but here it has, take this as a warning of the dangers.

NF: toooo warm :cool: but I love it. Roasting my balls off, relaxing.
 
Aaah, you people dont know what you want. Yet, on the other hand, you feel it very well. Being in a relationship is a serious committment and you are afraid of it. It is for you to decide, whether you will follow your brain or your heart. So yes, its good to take your time and think about it, so that you dont hurt anybody. But, please, dont think too much... ;)
 
marduk1507 said:
Aaah, you people dont know what you want. Yet, on the other hand, you feel it very well. Being in a relationship is a serious committment and you are afraid of it. It is for you to decide, whether you will follow your brain or your heart. So yes, its good to take your time and think about it, so that you dont hurt anybody. But, please, dont think too much... ;)
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Haha. Exactly. this post is to validate your response...

Nf: Still warm... I'm listening to the new Arise album and it's making me jiggle around with a mosher's excitement. It's great... Like Corporation 187 but heavier... similar to Dimension zero but not just blast beats all the time. Im so chilled out now, its unbelievable.
 
marduk, yes, I dont want to hurt someone or give him wrong hopes as long as I dont know what I feel and want. It takes me so much time and yes, I'm afraid to start a serious relationship now cause I feel I am not ready for it, there is still so much heart damage inside, I need to sort that chaos out and dont wanna carry it in a new relation and destroy everything with my fears.
 
i have thought a lot about such issues lately, and right now i see it like this: if i don't have a clue about what a possible relation might be like, if i feel afraid or something like that because of experiences i have made so far - the only way is to find out and try it. if you don't, afterwards you will have all these might-have-beens and whatnot.
this doesn't mean that you should become a stone cold bitch who seduces anyone just for fun, of course. if you can say clearly that you don't want him right now, tell him so and be honest towards both of you. but if you aren't... what do you have to lose? you can only regain trust in other people through good experiences with them, and not giving them a chance to happen turns your path into a very stony one. just try, and if it doesn't work, carry on without him.
 
King Chaos said:
It's unusual that flirting over the internet turns into anything... but here it has, take this as a warning of the dangers.
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Man, me and my gf used to browse those dating sites just for fun, and to see what kind of responses we got. She just got endless floods of emails from guys (and girls) who wanted to hook up with her, while I, on the other hand, got about 5 hardcore stalkers who tracked down my screenname and such to msg me all the time. The scariest was that one figured out where I lived and found it fun to inform me that she lived about 10 blocks away (certain details of the area were enough to convince me of her truthfulness). It was damn scary. Now I stay away from talking at all online mostly, unless it's in a game like WoW. But then it's never of the personal kind of talking at all, usually.

~kov.
 
@DL1: Im inclined to disagree with Mal. Although your point is fair mal, it's hard to get into the mindset to just march into it and say "Lets see how it goes". 'Finding out' is part of the problem and what your finding out is an issue too. If you're finding out whether or not you are actually ready for it again, I'd say wait till you know you're ready. It might be an eternity, but you're still doing what you want at least (unless you want to be able to love again, but innoscence to heartbreak is impossible to reachieve after the first).

Kovenant84 said:
Man, me and my gf used to browse those dating sites just for fun, and to see what kind of responses we got. She just got endless floods of emails from guys (and girls) who wanted to hook up with her, while I, on the other hand, got about 5 hardcore stalkers who tracked down my screenname and such to msg me all the time. The scariest was that one figured out where I lived and found it fun to inform me that she lived about 10 blocks away (certain details of the area were enough to convince me of her truthfulness). It was damn scary. Now I stay away from talking at all online mostly, unless it's in a game like WoW. But then it's never of the personal kind of talking at all, usually.

~kov.
Click to expand...

yeah. Although sometimes it's difficult to comprehend, there's actually people behind these letters... and some of them are fucked up... The people that is... not the letters...

I'm scared to go into my room cos I think she might have flooded my phone with messages, Cable Guy style. :p... Nah Im being really cruel actually, she hasn't gone that far yet, but she's border line psycho. I haven't given her any real reason to want me so though. When we met I was hardly a party animal, and all I seemed to do was give her pics, and I didn't even look good in them. Shit, Im scaring my self again. After we met she was talking about my smell and how it was clinging to her, and how she felt like I was still there... :ill:, oh man.

NF: Like Dream Evil understand... :cry:





:lol:
 
oooh congrats!!!!

feel great too, this weekend its kaltenbach open air, seeing my mates from primordial and some good friends from switzerland again... and just got the confirmation that I can take pics at the earthshaker fest in germany *happy* . and also maybe wacken will work, wow!
 
Thanks Mala, thanks Caro!

Didn't do anything concerning my studien so far today (except the exam). That's a quite good feeling. May I'll ask some friends now if they want to go and have a beer this evening.

Congrats Caro for Earthshaker. I tried to get accreditation for Gates Of Metal. I'll start writing for an online-mag soon (GoM will be the first report actually), so maybe it works, would be cool.

Discovered webradio within the last 2 hours, never tried it before, but it's quite nice. Rothmetal.com just played Gates of Ishtar - Dawn of Flames. That's cool, didn't listen to them for... years I think. But they were a really cool band. I think I'll go on with this, may bring me a bigger horizon.
 
Yeah, thats interesting, Ive been thinking about checking out some of those radios for some time, Ill try it at work, so that my mates have some decent education (especially one of´em). Btw. our companys been brought to life on july 1st officially and projects are coming! Right now Ive dnlded one through ftp and you wouldnt believe it, but it was divided into 38 rar files. Ill have a hell of a time getting an idea of it in following 2 days. :D

NF: good, the biggest festival in our country Pohoda 2005, starts on friday and the best thing is that it takes place in my town, at the airport. So Im getting excited already (The Prodigy are the headliner, lol).
 
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