Which way do you wipe your ass?

[viewerfromnihil]

My butt is gross because when I poop, poop doesn't go all over the place so I only have to wipe once?

 

[Krigloch the Furious]

wtf, I want a one wiper!
I never have a super hard, clean shit

 

[Orion Crystal Ice]

There is this utterly amazing cotton candy flavor ice cream which happens to be an incredible blue, that has caused everything to be green for like 3 days. Once it looked strikingly similar to a gigantic radioactive underwater broccoli, no lie. I wasn't quite depraved enough to go take a pic though. Almost, but not quite.

 

[Xorv]

My diseased cat has a neurogenic bowel. You should see the fucking porch. Diarrhea seeped out of her butt every time she laid down/sat on the chairs/tables/floor. I'd come home and there would be gobs of viscous shit on the welcome mat or the swing char, as it slowly crusted from the spring sun. I couldn't take it anymore so I decided to shove a copper wire in her eye socket and deform her diseased brain. These days I have her laying on my front lawn so I can watch the anatomy of a slowly decaying corpse, don't worry though I added some salt to make my pleasure last longer.

For good measure I also stomped on her kittens.


please kill this thread

 

[Orion Crystal Ice]

I often wonder, if you were to swallow a large slug, and then eat a whole bag of pretzels, what would happen upon exit.

 

[Xorv]

I often wonder, if you were to swallow a large slug, and then eat a whole bag of pretzels, what would happen upon exit.

mutantllama

 

[waif]

So for a couple days I was noticing I'd wipe my ass and there'd be blood. Just a bit, but still, not good. But it's gone.

 

[SweptbackFlame]

I often wonder, if you were to swallow a large slug, and then eat a whole bag of pretzels, what would happen upon exit.

mutantllama

 

[Krigloch the Furious]

So for a couple days I was noticing I'd wipe my ass and there'd be blood. Just a bit, but still, not good. But it's gone.

been there, done that. but with alot of blood. Im pretty sure it's from after taking a really hard, sharp shit.

 

[Vimana]

Eating knives is generally a bad thing.

 

[Doomguy]

fixed it for you.

Editing posts makes god cry.

And I shat off a bridge once.

 

[False Joe]

been there, done that. but with alot of blood. Im pretty sure it's from after taking a really hard, sharp shit.

I once wiped too much with bad quality toilet paper.

There's no quite feeling of annoyance as standing in a chinese for 7 hours serving people while your arsehole slowly heals itself in an incredibly itchy way.

 

[zabu of nΩd]

Yeah, wiping with bad toilet paper is the worst.

 

[Vimana]

I wiped my ass with a piece of wood once. I'm sure it looks different now.

 

[Krigloch the Furious]

Eating knives is generally a bad thing.

yeah, but im metal as fuck!
metal up my ass?

 

[Orion Crystal Ice]

I just look for the paper towels altogether, because the toilet paper is weak and shreds up and gets nasty and stuff, what is this steele pulp you all speak of?

 

[V.V.V.V.V.]

mutantllama

 

[Alongside Death]

I just put toilet paper between my buttcheeks and squeze them hard as fuck while standing up.

 

[viewerfromnihil]

I did that once or twice when my arse got sore from constant wiping due to diahria