corrupt-a-wish

Granted, but you twist your leg in a hole and tear your LCL.

I wish I had a container for all my blood so I wouldn't bleed to death.
 
Granted, but they're so well integrated into brain function that you're left with about 50 brain cells ..all of which have bad colds.

I wish this left over pizza tasted better.
 
Granted, but since that didn't make sense you get hit by lightening.

I wish I could find the inner strength to get up, shower and grab a bunch of DVDs today. :p
 
Granted, but your spelling only improves in a language you won't use.

I wish I lived on another planet.
 
Granted, but your head explodes due to the intense pressure and the pieces are picked up and eaten by a passing alien.

I wish my pumpkin pie was ready.
 
Granted but your family shows up and all that is left is the pan and an empty can of whipped topping.

I wish my penmanship was better.
 
Granted but you become destitute and end up playing harmonica on the subway for coins.

I wish I could remember half of what I have forgot.
 
Granted, but you get the flu next week twice as bad.

I wish people in general had better coping skills.