Does anyone else here have depression?

[Lanterns]

I've been having depression for about eight years on/off now....well by on/off I mean, sometimes it was only mildly, and sometimes it was just fucking killing me. It never really went away though, although I take pills (Seroxat). Also, my mom's worried about me drinkin too much and is a fucken pain in the ass. Since summer 2002 my life (if you can call it that) is COMPLETELY out of control. and if all that bullshit weren't enough, I'm 20 and have a crush on a fucking rock star. Which makes me feel ashamed as fuck.
LIFE IS VOMITIVE. uke: uke: uke:

 

[The Devil's Steed]

I've had depression from time to time, it's pretty clear that I have clinical depression even though it's not diagnozed, based on just how serious it gets...I usually have a reason for it when I fall into a deep depression, although rarely it just happens. When I'm depressed, I usually listen to music that's either very anger based, or very depression based,and it helps, although certain songs I can't listen to, because the lyrics hit WAY too close to home, and it just makes it worse. I also play video games to escape from reality and talk to friends, since they can help, because they know what it's like.(it goes the other way, too) Although, I haven't done it yet, as a last resort I'd drink a bit, to get me away from reality for a while, but that's simply a last resort if I can't find another way to deal with it. Right now, I'm happy, though, I'm in a good relationship, so I don't have much of a reason to be depressed.

 

[Profanity]

I find it interesting that so many UM members have or have had depression, maybe it's UM which is making you depressed.

 

[Arch]

I find it interesting that so many UM members have or have had depression, maybe it's UM which is making you depressed.

Depression is as common as your puny brain can think.

 

[Life Sucks]

I've had depression from time to time, it's pretty clear that I have clinical depression even though it's not diagnozed, based on just how serious it gets...I usually have a reason for it when I fall into a deep depression, although rarely it just happens. When I'm depressed, I usually listen to music that's either very anger based, or very depression based,and it helps, although certain songs I can't listen to, because the lyrics hit WAY too close to home, and it just makes it worse. I also play video games to escape from reality and talk to friends, since they can help, because they know what it's like.(it goes the other way, too) Although, I haven't done it yet, as a last resort I'd drink a bit, to get me away from reality for a while, but that's simply a last resort if I can't find another way to deal with it. Right now, I'm happy, though, I'm in a good relationship, so I don't have much of a reason to be depressed.

Yeah, I find that listening to angry or depressed music helps. Other people don't seem to understand, and think I should listen to happy music to make me feel better. I CANNOT listen to happy music; it just makes me more angry and depressed. BTW, what songs can't you listen to because they hit too close to home? I'd be interested to see if I know them or listen to them when I am feeling like shit.

 

[Profanity]

Depression is as common as your puny brain can think.

Depression is greediness and selfishness, people whowant more than they have e.t.c

 

[The Devil's Steed]

Yeah, I find that listening to angry or depressed music helps. Other people don't seem to understand, and think I should listen to happy music to make me feel better. I CANNOT listen to happy music; it just makes me more angry and depressed. BTW, what songs can't you listen to because they hit too close to home? I'd be interested to see if I know them or listen to them when I am feeling like shit.

I can listen to happy music, on the lines of Helloween, etc. but not if I'm in a bad mood trying to cheer myself up. ESPECIALLY not those "the world is such a great place" songs. God I hate those fucking things, they put me in a bad mood if I'm in a good one because the ignorance in them pisses me off so fucking bad. But, as I was saying....Hm, I doubt you do, because I recall you mentioning that you hate songs about love, etc, and most of them are about losing a loved one, some of the lyrics just hit too close to home about how I felt at the time, the only ones I can think off the top of my head are Iced Earth -- I Died For You and Judas Priest -- Close To You, hope that answers your question.

 

[Life Sucks]

I can listen to happy music, on the lines of Helloween, etc. but not if I'm in a bad mood trying to cheer myself up. ESPECIALLY not those "the world is such a great place" songs. God I hate those fucking things, they put me in a bad mood if I'm in a good one because the ignorance in them pisses me off so fucking bad. But, as I was saying....Hm, I doubt you do, because I recall you mentioning that you hate songs about love, etc, and most of them are about losing a loved one, some of the lyrics just hit too close to home about how I felt at the time, the only ones I can think off the top of my head are Iced Earth -- I Died For You and Judas Priest -- Close To You, hope that answers your question.

Ah, ok so it hits close to home in the sense that you have lost a girlfriend before. Sorry to hear that. Yeah, I don't like songs about relationships, especially happy love songs, but I don't like whiny breakup songs either. Maybe that's because I have never had a relationship before.

 

[MURAI]

EVERYONE! STOP MAKING FUN OF PROFANITY'S APPEARANCE! IT IS NOT NICE! People like Profanity make fairly ugly boys like me seem attractive in comparison to the ladies. Thank you so much, Profanity.

 

[MURAI]

i suffered from two serious bouts of depression in my teens. the thing about depression is that reduces you to a state where you merely be. you don't enjoy your life , you don't care about anything you dont give a fuck about anything you just be. you wake up and then you want to go back to sleep as if your asleep you can't think about how shit things are.

I can relate to that so much cause I exactly had that most of last year. When I had depression every waking moment was agony; I was living dead. I felt constantly lethargic and depressed or just irritated and I was too weary to care or give a fuck about anything.

Sometimes I still feel extremely low and irritated, but this year I started to turn my life around and things are looking better. I try now to look at the positive side of things and keep myself togather.

I do talk to people and make friends at college here and there but I dont mind being alone. And I'm not the kind of guy that wants to be everyone's friend all the time if you know what I mean.

Dont despair all. Life will pick up if you at least try.

 

[The Devil's Steed]

Ah, ok so it hits close to home in the sense that you have lost a girlfriend before. Sorry to hear that. Yeah, I don't like songs about relationships, especially happy love songs, but I don't like whiny breakup songs either. Maybe that's because I have never had a relationship before.

Eh, it depends on what type of feeling the song discusses since different types of breaks up caused different emotions, but you have the general idea, I don't need to lecture. As for not liking happy love songs, I agree for the most part, but there are some I don't mind hearing from time to time such as the "The One" by Sentenced, and some songs about break-ups are whiny to me...and some well done. It just depends.

 

[Dr. Ummer]

There is a lot of good advice on this thread. I hope it helps you, Life Sucks. I got really depressed about two years ago. On top of that, I was in denial about being depressed. I thought the problem was everyone else, not me. It's a good sign that you can talk about it, though. As soon as I could bring myself to talk about it, I got a lot better. I think I finally got sick of thinking negatively and I thought, "Fuck this. I'm too strong to let things get to me anymore."

So don't worry about it. You'll pull through.

 

[Taliesin]

Heh, so it was pretty much the same as with me in your case Dr.Ummer
I really want to help people here you know.. when I joined UM I met a lot of people who came up with good advice and stuff.. and I still think that some of these people are one of the reasons why Im still here. Ive gone through a few times where only one or two things or people made me go on.. but that wouldnt have happened without the people I met here in the first place.. I try to help people in a similar way now.. I hope Im making a good job here..

BTW, what songs can't you listen to because they hit too close to home? I'd be interested to see if I know them or listen to them when I am feeling like shit.

I'll pick this up and answer in Blade Golem's stead then

Sonata Arctica - Replica (This song pretty accurately describes how I felt when I was depressive.. it's still difficult to listen to, even though I like it a lot)
My Dying Bride - For My Fallen Angel (When I was depressive.. the first tune already almost made me suffocate.. maybe the saddest song I know)
VNV Nation - Holding On (lyrics for this one: http://www.vnvnation.com/lyrics/holdingon.htm)
Metallica - Fade To Black (Metallica is plain class.. you hafta face that fact )
Sentenced - No One There cry

I'll continue this list when I remember more songs..

But.. like I said.. in retrospect, I can say that those songs helped me feel better for a while.. but kept me in the depressive circle.. they help you to build up the reasons to justify the hurt.

If you want to get out of depression, you have to start thinking of it as a disease, and not as a way of life. Depression is an illness that we have professional cure for.. that should tell you how much of a serious condition it is.. well, enough of my talk now.
Take care people
NV

 

[Life Sucks]

Yeah, Fade To Black is one I listen to a lot when I am very depressed. Other good ones:

Sentenced - Excuse Me While I Kill Myself
Sentenced - Everything Is Nothing
Dismember - And So Is Life
Life Of Agony - Other Side Of The River
Life Of Agony - River Runs Red
Life Of Agony - My Eyes
Paradise Lost - Crying for Eternity
Shai Hulud - For The World

Bands that I like to listen to in general when I'm depressed:

Opeth
Dark Tranquility
Lacuna Coil
Sentenced
Paradise Lost
Shai Hulud

With these bands it is more the overall atmosphere than the lyrics to the individual songs that makes them good to listen to when depressed. Listening to depressive music really helps me when I'm feeling down.

 

[Taliesin]

These days, the best band for me is Amon Amarth... the energy and wrath in this music always pushes me up.. shouting along with good music must be one of the best therapies ever

WE STORM AHEAD, WITH SWORDS AND SHIELDS
FOR VICTORY WE RIDE
WE FIGHT THE WORLD ON THESE BATTLEFIELDS
TO RE-ERECT THE PAGAN PRIDE!



!

 

[Life Sucks]

The music of Amon Amarth is epic and aggressive, which I suppose would work when depressed. Yesterday I found that Bethlehem is a good band to listen to when depressed. I only have a few of their mp3s though.

 

[Profanity]

Depressed people are selfish/greedy people.

They WANT more than what they currently have, they think life owes them something because one of THEIR loved ones have died or they've been raped, tortured, bullied e.t.c and because depressed people are so SELFISH they will punish their loved ones as well with their behaviour.

Warning-If someone in your family has/has had depression then you are better off without them.

 

[Arch]

Depression is one of the things you don't understand, Profånity. So stop pretending that you have all the answers you lard ass.

 

[no country for old wainds]

Profanity doubtlessly knows which country depression originates from, however.

SOILWORK DEATH METAL!!1!

 

[R.I.P.2]

Depressed people are selfish/greedy people.

They WANT more than what they currently have, they think life owes them something because one of THEIR loved ones have died or they've been raped, tortured, bullied e.t.c and because depressed people are so SELFISH they will punish their loved ones as well with their behaviour.

Warning-If someone in your family has/has had depression then you are better off without them.

I'm so sorry, Freud, but I'm going to have disagree with you on this one. You've never had depression, you don't know what it's like. Please, either get a clue or keep quiet.

Depression is nothing to do with being greedy or selfish. I'm perfectly satisfied with my life, but that didn't stop me from getting depression, because I'm not happy with myself. I hope you become depressed for a while just so you know what it's like. If not, I hope you drown in your own flab. Fucker.