Foreplay Thread
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JayKeeley
Be still, O wand'rer!
NAD
What A Horrible Night To Have A Curse
I can imagine JayK sitting at the dinner table, 4th Guinness in hand: "these fookin' Muslims are in the bloody Dark Ages!" 
Hmm, maybe they're Hindus after all...
Hmm, maybe they're Hindus after all...
JayKeeley
Be still, O wand'rer!
NAD
What A Horrible Night To Have A Curse
I just stumbled across that and literally started headbanging, this is a keeper for a long time.
anonymousnick2001
World's Greatest Vocalist
Lies and Perfidy
Gentleman of the Road
Holy shit, this thread is fucking brilliant. I mean, every single place this thread has gone has been completely awesome. I need to take a picture with a giant engine of destruction and become a disciple of Hell Mike Motorbism. A Jew for HMM.
And on a side note, Conan the Destroyer rules simply because of the scene where he punches out a camel. A fucking camel. With his bare fist. That makes the entire movie worth it.
And on a side note, Conan the Destroyer rules simply because of the scene where he punches out a camel. A fucking camel. With his bare fist. That makes the entire movie worth it.
Hell Mike
fuck melodic black metal
Yay, my first jew! You are from now on the High Accountant and that means you are in charge of getting money from people and processing it to my accounts. And having a funny jewfro.Pyrus said:
He does that in the Barbarian too while drunk, and in the Destroyer he says "Sorry about last time" and the camel spits on him so he floors it again. Killer scene, and the Destroyer rules, but it DOES NOT come close to the atmosphere and epicness of the first one. I saw some obsessed fan rant about this once on another forum and sometime if Crom grants me the strength I shall dig that up and blatantly steal it just to post it here for all of you to admire.
Erik
New Metal Member
I thought that scene in the Destroyer was such a blatant "comic relief!" moment that it sort of sucked... Actually the film is far too full of them, Barbaryan über alles
John Altman on Cock Fighting and Domestic Violence
I'm sure that you have heard or read about how South Carolina decided to make cock fighting into a felony crime while tabling a similar attempt in regard to domestic violence, which remains a misdemeanor.
John Altman, the Representative who decided to give his reasons for supporting the cockfighting punishment while opposing the domestic violence one, has this to say about attempts to compare the two:
"People who compare the two are not very smart and if you don't understand the difference, Ms. Gormley, between trying to ban the savage practice of watching chickens trying to kill each other and protecting people rights in CDV statutes, I'll never be able to explain it to you in a 100 years ma'am."
I'm sure that you have heard or read about how South Carolina decided to make cock fighting into a felony crime while tabling a similar attempt in regard to domestic violence, which remains a misdemeanor.
John Altman, the Representative who decided to give his reasons for supporting the cockfighting punishment while opposing the domestic violence one, has this to say about attempts to compare the two:
"People who compare the two are not very smart and if you don't understand the difference, Ms. Gormley, between trying to ban the savage practice of watching chickens trying to kill each other and protecting people rights in CDV statutes, I'll never be able to explain it to you in a 100 years ma'am."
NAD
What A Horrible Night To Have A Curse
Am I the only one man enough to gladly admit that I've been reading the Conan magazines since '94?
I think I've read every conan book every written. Robert E. Howard was a strange guy, but he could spin a tale.
JayKeeley
Be still, O wand'rer!
I own the directors cut of Conan the Barbarian on DVD, if that's anything. Oh, I also own the soundtrack by Basil Pouledoris. Oh and my review of Death's Design is the only review on the whole intraweb that mentions the Conan theme in the 9th movement.
Erik
New Metal Member
DIABOLICAL MASQUERADE
DEATH'S DESIGN
2001 OLYMPIC RECORDINGS/ AVANT-GARDE RECORDS
Blackheim (apparently now Blakkheim) is getting weirder and weirder with every release he has a hand in. I remember the first DIABOLICAL MASQUERADE disc, and it was decent enough for the time, even though it was pretty standard sounding black metal. I haven't heard any of the other DM albums up until now, but this one is a real doozy. I think the man has been listening to a lot of SIGH albums. Death's Design is comprised of sixty one short tracks of highly orchestrated metal that comes across very much like a movie soundtrack. At times, I can almost see the movie as I listen to the album, and that's without chemical assistance. This is what I suppose one would call a "challenging" album to listen to. The songs seem more like "pieces parts" of things instead of really being songs. By the way Blakkheim, I wasn't too impressed with how you ripped off part of the Conan the Barbarian soundtrack on "Not of Flesh, Not of Blood," and didn't give any credit to Basil Poledouris. A very weird experience overall, and I think you may very well have to make your own decision on this one.
http://www.geocities.com/metalnightmarezine/reviewseleven.html
löl :<
DEATH'S DESIGN
2001 OLYMPIC RECORDINGS/ AVANT-GARDE RECORDS
Blackheim (apparently now Blakkheim) is getting weirder and weirder with every release he has a hand in. I remember the first DIABOLICAL MASQUERADE disc, and it was decent enough for the time, even though it was pretty standard sounding black metal. I haven't heard any of the other DM albums up until now, but this one is a real doozy. I think the man has been listening to a lot of SIGH albums. Death's Design is comprised of sixty one short tracks of highly orchestrated metal that comes across very much like a movie soundtrack. At times, I can almost see the movie as I listen to the album, and that's without chemical assistance. This is what I suppose one would call a "challenging" album to listen to. The songs seem more like "pieces parts" of things instead of really being songs. By the way Blakkheim, I wasn't too impressed with how you ripped off part of the Conan the Barbarian soundtrack on "Not of Flesh, Not of Blood," and didn't give any credit to Basil Poledouris. A very weird experience overall, and I think you may very well have to make your own decision on this one.
http://www.geocities.com/metalnightmarezine/reviewseleven.html
löl :<
NAD
What A Horrible Night To Have A Curse
Exploding toads!!!
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tm.../ap/20050428/ap_on_sc/germany_exploding_toads
BERLIN - Why are toads puffing up and spontaneously exploding in northern Europe? It began in a posh German neighborhood and has spread across the border into Denmark. It's left onlookers baffled, but one German scientist studying the splattered amphibian remains now has a theory: Hungry crows may be pecking out their livers.
"The crows are clever," said Frank Mutschmann, a Berlin veterinarian who collected and tested specimens at the Hamburg pond. "They learn quickly from watching other crows how to get the livers."
So far, more than 1,000 toad corpses have been found at a pond in Hamburg and in Denmark. But the pond water in Hamburg has been tested, and its quality is no better or worse than elsewhere in the city. The remains have been checked for a virus or bacteria, but none has been found.
Based on the wounds, Mutschmann said, it appears that a bird pecks into the toad with its beak between the amphibian's chest and abdominal cavity, and the toad puffs itself up as a natural defense mechanism.
But, because the liver is missing and there's a hole in the toad's body, the blood vessels and lungs burst and the other organs ooze out, he said.
As gruesome as it sounds, it isn't actually that unusual, he said.
"It's not unique it's in a city area, and that makes it spectacular," Mutschmann said. "Of course, it's something very dramatic."
There have also been reports of exploded toads in a pond near Laasby in central Jutland in Denmark.
Local environmental workers in Hamburg have described it as a scene out of a horror or science fiction movie, with the bloated frogs agonizing and twitching for several minutes, inflating like a balloon before suddenly bursting.
"It's horrible," biologist Heidi Mayerhoefer was quoted as telling the Hamburger Morgenpost daily.
"The toads burst, the entrails slide out. But the animal isn't immediately dead they keep struggling for several minutes."
Hamburg's Institute for Hygiene and the Environment regularly tests water quality in the city, and found no evidence that the toads were diseased. The institute even ruled out that the toads were suffering because of a fungus brought in from South America.
Other theories have been that horses on a nearby track infected them with a virus, or even that the toads are taking the selfless way out sacrificing themselves by suicide to save others from overpopulation.
Could hungry crows be a reasonable answer?
"We haven't seen that. It might be, it might not be," said institute spokeswoman Janne Kloepper. "It's speculation," until it's observed, she said.
Local officials in Hamburg were advising residents to stay away from the pond dubbed by German tabloids, "the death pool."
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tm.../ap/20050428/ap_on_sc/germany_exploding_toads
BERLIN - Why are toads puffing up and spontaneously exploding in northern Europe? It began in a posh German neighborhood and has spread across the border into Denmark. It's left onlookers baffled, but one German scientist studying the splattered amphibian remains now has a theory: Hungry crows may be pecking out their livers.
"The crows are clever," said Frank Mutschmann, a Berlin veterinarian who collected and tested specimens at the Hamburg pond. "They learn quickly from watching other crows how to get the livers."
So far, more than 1,000 toad corpses have been found at a pond in Hamburg and in Denmark. But the pond water in Hamburg has been tested, and its quality is no better or worse than elsewhere in the city. The remains have been checked for a virus or bacteria, but none has been found.
Based on the wounds, Mutschmann said, it appears that a bird pecks into the toad with its beak between the amphibian's chest and abdominal cavity, and the toad puffs itself up as a natural defense mechanism.
But, because the liver is missing and there's a hole in the toad's body, the blood vessels and lungs burst and the other organs ooze out, he said.
As gruesome as it sounds, it isn't actually that unusual, he said.
"It's not unique it's in a city area, and that makes it spectacular," Mutschmann said. "Of course, it's something very dramatic."
There have also been reports of exploded toads in a pond near Laasby in central Jutland in Denmark.
Local environmental workers in Hamburg have described it as a scene out of a horror or science fiction movie, with the bloated frogs agonizing and twitching for several minutes, inflating like a balloon before suddenly bursting.
"It's horrible," biologist Heidi Mayerhoefer was quoted as telling the Hamburger Morgenpost daily.
"The toads burst, the entrails slide out. But the animal isn't immediately dead they keep struggling for several minutes."
Hamburg's Institute for Hygiene and the Environment regularly tests water quality in the city, and found no evidence that the toads were diseased. The institute even ruled out that the toads were suffering because of a fungus brought in from South America.
Other theories have been that horses on a nearby track infected them with a virus, or even that the toads are taking the selfless way out sacrificing themselves by suicide to save others from overpopulation.
Could hungry crows be a reasonable answer?
"We haven't seen that. It might be, it might not be," said institute spokeswoman Janne Kloepper. "It's speculation," until it's observed, she said.
Local officials in Hamburg were advising residents to stay away from the pond dubbed by German tabloids, "the death pool."
JayKeeley
Be still, O wand'rer!
JayKeeley
Be still, O wand'rer!
I've been had! Damn yous, damn yous to outerspace.
"Jeeeewws iiinnnn spaaaaaaaacccce!!!"
[Wow, there is not a single image on google for "jews in space" from Spaceballs!!]
Oh well, this one is apt since Erik be wantin' a duel:
"Jeeeewws iiinnnn spaaaaaaaacccce!!!"
[Wow, there is not a single image on google for "jews in space" from Spaceballs!!]
Oh well, this one is apt since Erik be wantin' a duel:
