If You Could Open a Metal Store...

[JontRevolting]

seems like actual stores don't do too well where i live 3 or so have tried and no matter how much local metalheads supported those stores there just is'nt the population here to support them,can't wait to go to Metal Mayhem(Melbourne) on tuesday, plenty of cash to burn

 

[Rumpole]

Make sure you go to Missing Link when you're there, it's only about five minutes walk away.

http://www.missinglink.net.au/

 

[Dead Children Speak No Lies]

I would somehow use the store to screw hot chicks.

My store would be run by nude hot chicks (and Lemmy - not nude).

I would also have Fred Durst in a cage and charge $5 for 5 minutes with him (do whatever you want).

Alos spend $100 or more, get a free penguin.

 

[Satanstoenail]

Make sure you go to Missing Link when you're there, it's only about five minutes walk away.

http://www.missinglink.net.au/

Best record store in Melbourne. Every time I go there I have to exercise large amounts of restraint or I blow all my cash.

 

[Cythraul]

Mine would have a sign on the front which would say "If you are a false don't entry". Not only would this keep falses away from my awesome store but it would insure that only true as fuck motherfuckers entried my store because only they would get the kvlt reference displayed on the front of my awesome and true as fuck store and thus they would not be intimidated by its utter fucking metalness.

 

[Dead Children Speak No Lies]

Mine would have a sign on the front which would say "If you are a false don't entry". Not only would this keep falses away from my awesome store but it would insure that only true as fuck motherfuckers entried my store because only they would get the kvlt reference displayed on the front of my awesome and true as fuck store and thus they would not be intimidated by its utter fucking metalness.

Is the whole building made out of METAl??

In fact are you a robot?

 

[King Richard]

Mine would have a sign on the front which would say "If you are a false don't entry". Not only would this keep falses away from my awesome store but it would insure that only true as fuck motherfuckers entried my store because only they would get the kvlt reference displayed on the front of my awesome and true as fuck store and thus they would not be intimidated by its utter fucking metalness.

You'll be bankrupt in three days.

 

[Satanstoenail]

You'll be bankrupt in three days.

Good thing you arrived in the nick of time with a fatherly quip, I'm sure he was just about to sign the papers.

 

[Onder]

Mine would have a sign on the front which would say "If you are a false don't entry".

I´d enter.

 

[Zephyrus]

Mine would have a sign on the front which would say "If you are a false don't entry". Not only would this keep falses away from my awesome store but it would insure that only true as fuck motherfuckers entried my store because only they would get the kvlt reference displayed on the front of my awesome and true as fuck store and thus they would not be intimidated by its utter fucking metalness.

That's no better than having an entrance exam for kindergarten. You should let anyone shop there, so as to educate the unenlightened. It can only do good, both for your business, and for the musical tastes of your clientele. Just because some scenesters may frequent your store, doesn't mean you have to cater to their tastes.

 

[Zephyrus]

I´d enter.

Who's that in your avatar? He reminds me of the PC guy from those Mac vs. PC commercials.

 

[The Ozzman]

If I were to start a store, the most comprehensive section would be metal. I'd have all the other genres as well because I'm not stupid and would want to turn a profit, but metal would be a huge section. I'd also have a huge used section where everything would be cheap.

 

[rms]

Id never dreamed of owning a record store, but I do want to get rich and famous and own a venue to have shows

Probaly never going to happen.

 

[Onder]

Who's that in your avatar? He reminds me of the PC guy from those Mac vs. PC commercials.

It's ancient Czech TV news moderator, Miloš Frýba.

 

[waif]

Epitomising the musical ideals of sub-underground black metal - the kind of stuff that comes out in limited editions of 300 through vinyl-only labels based in a cave in Belarus. The exact requirements of kvltness vary depending on who you talk to, but usually involve icy, impenetrable production, black-and-white cover art, and concepts drawn from black magic, pagan myths or out-and-out nihilism.

Like anyone who takes art seriously these days, kvltists are the target of much mockery even from fellow extreme metal fans.

urban dictionary

To be honest, though, most of them deserve it - a lot of people sneer at anything that sells a hundred thousand copies. Or look down on people who don't have a copy of the new Abrasive Monkey Shit demo.

 

[skeptik]

Please tell me I'm not the only one who knows that Cythraul is talking about Sarcofago.

 

[cookiecutter]

That's what I guessed but I wasn't sure

 

[SentinelSlain]

I'd have lot's of fairly mainstream new music so it actually has a chance of working but I'd have a selection in one corner of what I consider the best metal and label it as that.

 

[Psychonaut]

It's ancient Czech TV news moderator, Miloš Frýba.

That was my guess

<.<
>.>

 

[Cythraul]

Please tell me I'm not the only one who knows that Cythraul is talking about Sarcofago.

Congratulations, sir. You may entry my store.