Yeah I think you guys really nailed a few of my peeves. I always feel like I'm nitpicking with the genre thing but it's annoying when someone who does not get my music asks what kind of band I play in and basically everything I try to use to describe it makes them more confused. The following is a excerpt of a real conversation I had about a week ago describing my Melodic Death Metal Band.
Girl - "oh so it's a heavy thing, I like that stuff sometimes too like screamo and stuff. Is it like Alexisonfire"
Me - Nah it's pretty much jsut Death Metal (trying to keep it simple)
Girl - More like Billy Talent?
Me - No you're actually getting further form it
Girl - What about to Disturbed do you like them?
Me - Okay Seriously I doubt you know what it is
Girl - is it like that yelling stuff where you scream about death? *Does HORRIBLE growling impression that everyone does to imitate/make fun of it because they think it all sounds the same and takes no skill*
Me - Yeahhh.... Let's just leave it at that.
She went on for a few more minutes but this is a near exact record of the conversation. She was nice about it and legitimately wanted to know but it gets toa point where you realize the other person doesn't get it.
All that said, the thing that really bothers me is when people call it nothing but noise or they judge the ENTIRE band based on the style of vocals. People that listen to Pop and shit it's ALL about the vocals and they can't seem to comprehend that Metal is about the instruments more than anything. The vocals are often employed more as an instrument really, and lyrics are not the important part so much as the sound.
They hear more than a couple things going on at once and assume it's just talentless noise because they are used to one looping repetitive beat. For some reason they get hung up on one thing too rather than listening and paying attention to the details, to me this mean they have no true appreciation for music. I guess that's why they say most people enjoy their music, Metalheads live it.
And yeah the horrible impression people do to demean Screams/growls because again they think their bad impression is all it takes.