I just read your post again, and you haven't tried getting used to it. It's not necessary though, there's plenty of non death metal out there that's awesome.
when i started, i disliked harsh vocals, and the themes of extreme metal, but down inside the musical work that i wanted i knew would be found in extreme metal. i continued to listen to power metal and metallica type stuff. one day my friend recommended me a decapitated and opeth album, and an emperor album. listened to all three in 24 hours. i didn't mind decapitated, i liked the mechnical feeling to it. i liked opeth, lots of emotions and beautiful melody. i was also fascinated by emperor. i was actually driving in the passenger seat, with my head out the window at 5 in the morning, with my new mp3 player with the best speakers ever. the setting was perfect and i enjoyed it... they were good... but one day soon after i heard something called Behemoth - Demigod. It was exactly what i had been looking for. It blew me away, and the amount of enjoyment i got from it is indescribable. from that moment i began a frantic search for such material and got totally obsessed with metal.
actually, my friend sent me also a vital remains song and a slayer song. I totally despised slayer and still do, but i though the votal reminas was ok. after 4 listens i was blown away by that one song (most of their songs arent very good), so maybe i was always a death metal liker, you know.
its all about yer tastes dood