The official joke thread
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-Gavin-
Gavornator
-Gavin-
Gavornator
Turbo
Natursekt Black Metal
Turbo
Natursekt Black Metal
Turbo
Natursekt Black Metal
Turbo
Natursekt Black Metal
-Gavin-
Gavornator
What's jill dando's killer and jehovas witnesses got in common?
Both stand on your doorstep and do your head in!
Both stand on your doorstep and do your head in!
goth_fiend
happiness is jagermiester
TheSeldomlaid
Waffle Wizard
3 Swedes were out hunting. Suddenly they came over a set of tracks.
"That's bear!" said the first.
"No, it's deer!" said the second.
The third never got his mouth open, cause right then they were hit by the train.
"That's bear!" said the first.
"No, it's deer!" said the second.
The third never got his mouth open, cause right then they were hit by the train.
Turbo
Natursekt Black Metal
-Gavin-
Gavornator
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman are driving through the desert when their car breaks down. So they have to get out.
The irishman takes a bottle of whiskey with him, the Scotsman takes an umbrella and the Englishman takes a car door.
On the way they meet this old bastard. He says to the Irishman "I know why you've got the whiskey so you can have a drink when your thirsty", He says to the Scotsman "I know why you've got the umbrella to keep the sun off you", "but" he says to the Englishman "Why have you got the car door?" and the Englishman replies "If I get hot I can wind the window down!"
The irishman takes a bottle of whiskey with him, the Scotsman takes an umbrella and the Englishman takes a car door.
On the way they meet this old bastard. He says to the Irishman "I know why you've got the whiskey so you can have a drink when your thirsty", He says to the Scotsman "I know why you've got the umbrella to keep the sun off you", "but" he says to the Englishman "Why have you got the car door?" and the Englishman replies "If I get hot I can wind the window down!"
The Smart Swede
A Finn, a Swede and a Norwegian found themselves deserted on a small island. A Cannibal tribe lived on the island, and they emprisoned the three men. The cannibals gave each of them a final wish. First they asked the Norwegian. The Norwegian wanted to see his wife once more. The cannibals went to find the wife. After he saw his wife, the Norwegian was eaten, and the cannibals made a canoe out of his skin. The Finn wanted to smoke one more cigarette. He got his cigarette. After he was finished, he was eaten and his skin was used to make a canoe. Then came the Swede's turn - he wanted a fork. He started to punch holes into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME!"
A Finn, a Swede and a Norwegian found themselves deserted on a small island. A Cannibal tribe lived on the island, and they emprisoned the three men. The cannibals gave each of them a final wish. First they asked the Norwegian. The Norwegian wanted to see his wife once more. The cannibals went to find the wife. After he saw his wife, the Norwegian was eaten, and the cannibals made a canoe out of his skin. The Finn wanted to smoke one more cigarette. He got his cigarette. After he was finished, he was eaten and his skin was used to make a canoe. Then came the Swede's turn - he wanted a fork. He started to punch holes into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME!"
TheSeldomlaid
Waffle Wizard
-Gavin-
Gavornator
A Glaswegian stops before a graveyard in a Gorbals cemetery, and notices a carved tombstone declaring,
"Here lies a lawyer and an honest man..."
"Ach, who'd ever think..." he murmered, "there'd be enough room fer two men in that one wee grave..."
"Here lies a lawyer and an honest man..."
"Ach, who'd ever think..." he murmered, "there'd be enough room fer two men in that one wee grave..."
