couple days I ranted about my fucking anxiety problms, especially around people.
well heres a bit more of a rant:
There is this girl ive known for years. we dated once, in the early years of high school ( grade 8? lol ) . Anyways, ive been in love with her since,Many times I have tried to get together with her again, but my social horribleness forbid it. SO a week 1/2 ago she broke up with her boyfriend, and yeah. So tonight, we talked again. she was saying the usual break up shit like " i feel so worthless, he threw me away like garbage" etc etc etc.garble garble garble.
So somehow, I manage to sneak in my " he's a fucking idiot, many guys would do anything to have what he had" shes like " o hahaha, like who? " then I said " Me". that isn;t the problem, she then proceeded to say " that makes sense, especially how you always hang out with me" ( this was sarcastic, because I always avoid gatherings with anyone, including her) so yeah, then I of course spill the juices about my fucking social phobias etc.
POINT OF THIS ALL? I dont know. this really bothers me. I cant even get with the girl I fucking love because of my mental shit. Fuck me in the ass sideways ah fuck