Themed Mixtape Game

[Serjeant Grumbles]

If a girl I'd just met put on that Lordian Guard song I'd jump out the window and run away screaming.

Isn't Lordian Guard one of the better scenarios? You must have jumped out of a fuckton of windows in your lifetime.

 

[CiG]

It didn't sound to me like Nightwish.

 

[The Butt]

Like, that Adagio song was the kind of shit you find after hanging out at a goth club and some random goth girl shows you them because they are, like, her favorite fucking band. You agree just so you can choke-fuck her all night long and then wake up and get breakfast together and be like "Holy shit, what the fuck was I thinking? This song fucking sucks" and you drop her off and put on The Obsessed and drive away.

Super slam.

 

[The Ozzman]

All that cocaine went to Yoda's head.

 

[HamburgerBoy]

It had better, whores should pay for their own coke

 

[The Ozzman]

Isn't Lordian Guard one of the better scenarios? You must have jumped out of a fuckton of windows in your lifetime.

 

[CiG]

That^ album is a masterpiece of schizophrenic death metal, but that reissue art is God awful.

 

[Satanstoenail]

Isn't Lordian Guard one of the better scenarios? You must have jumped out of a fuckton of windows in your lifetime.

I don't get it but whatever

 

[The Ozzman]

That^ album is a masterpiece of schizophrenic death metal

Fuck yeah it is

 

[Internally Deformed]

Rudra - Hymns to Thee
8/10 Not if NS but don't really care either.

This confused me until I remembered the album title. From the band members' appearances/location, I assume they're talking about the original aryans rather than the Germanic appropriation, lol. Props for not downrating it.

Would this song have gotten better scores from the rest of you if you didn't assume they were bloody Nazis?

 

[Krow]

That song was garbage, NS lyrics don't bother me at all.

 

[Elric of Melniboné]

I just thought that song sounded like trash.

 

[Internally Deformed]

That snare drum reminds me of the sound hail makes when rapping against your empty skulls.

 

[Vegard Pompey]

Song was OK, lyrics not NS enough

 

[Baroque]

Adagio - In Nomine...
8.5/10
I'm really liking this. From the baroque-sounding intro, I was already sold.

baroque

Yoda:

 

[Serjeant Grumbles]

I don't get it but whatever

You're one lucky guy if you've never met girl who played any of the myriad shit out there that's worse than Lordian Guard.

 

[Satanstoenail]

You're one lucky guy if you've never met girl who played any of the myriad shit out there that's worse than Lordian Guard.

Oh. I was searching for something wittier. Doesn't really make sense considering I said

Lordian Guard - Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God
This is absolutely the worst fucking thing I've heard ever and I wanted to kill myself several times before it ended. 0/10

 

[Phylactery]

I'm suffering from a hangover and I've slept for like 3 hours in the past 2 days but I'll try and tally these up soon as everyone has done their ratings now.

 

[Phylactery]

Well EspaDa didn't rate as expected.

Here are the results:

Destroyer 666 - I am the Wargod - 8.1 @Elric of Melniboné
Realm - Eminence - 7.8 @HamburgerBoy
Paradox - Pray to the Godz of Wrath - 7.6 @Vegard Pompey
Crimson Glory - Azreal - 7.4 @Krow
Atlantean Kodex - Sol Invictus - 7.2 @Serjeant Grumbles
Burzum - Jesu død - 7.1 @The Ozzman
Adagio - In Nomine - 7.1 @Baroque
Macabre Omen - A Call from Gods to God - 6.3 @Master_Yoda77
Corrosion of Conformity - Mine are the Eyes of God - 6.2 @Satanstoenail
Symphony X - The Divine Wings of Tragedy - 6.0 @Talos of Atmora
Portrait - Lily - 5.9 @no country for old wainds
Rudra - Hymns to Thee - 5.6 @Internally Deformed
Lordian Guard - Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God - 5.2 @Vilden
Beastcraft - Burnt at His Altar - 4.9 @EspaDa

My thoughts:

Favourite pick for the theme: Lordian Guard - it's not my favourite track here but I thought it was a cool pick for this theme and a great opener for the list.

Least favourite pick: Symphony X - fuck this band. HamburgerBoy's review of it was spot on.

Best review comment: Satanstoenail - "I dunno, more oiled up men rollerblading hand in hand" hahaha.

Most disappointing results: Lordian Guard and Macabre Omen - both deserved higher placements imo.

 

[Elric of Melniboné]

I didn't think that I was going to win and I have no idea what a good theme would be. I'll have to come up with an idea. I thought that Realm would be the winner.