Confessions

[Captain Beard]

We need your saving grace, O Lord!

5 Hail Marys, 3 Our Fathers, and a hamburger. Now get out of my confessional box.

 

[El Stormo]

Unless you're an independent construction contractor[/clerks]

Sorry, haven't seen that.

I'd definitely join the Sith.

Sure, if you want to run around without a lower jaw and speaking in a silly robot voice, or if you want to have a face like a chunk of cracked pavement, or want to be some idiot dressed in black who can only speak in weird blubbering sounds and who goes down ridiculously fast even though he was a boss.

 

[Shpongled]

Fucking <3 you guys.

Right now I confess that I really, almost to the point of tears, miss Layne Staley and the real Alice in Chains.

 

[WhiteBeastofWotan]

Sorry, haven't seen that.

Sure, if you want to run around without a lower jaw and speaking in a silly robot voice, or if you want to have a face like a chunk of cracked pavement, or want to be some idiot dressed in black who can only speak in weird blubbering sounds and who goes down ridiculously fast even though he was a boss.

better than some prudish boob-ignoring self-righteous jedi!

 

[El Stormo]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6lzEhoXads

No JewTube at work, I'll take a look this afternoon.

better than some prudish boob-ignoring self-righteous jedi!

Ah, but if I were Bastila, I wouldn't ignore my own boobs.

 

[Morganna]

Fucking <3 you guys.

Right now I confess that I really, almost to the point of tears, miss Layne Staley and the real Alice in Chains.

We fucking love you Kevin!

Thank you for this awesome thread.

 

[Shapeless)))]

Wow, since so many are opening up here, I may just as well continue with my confessions.

I may have a speech impediment which shows up whenever speak with other languages other than mine (finnish.) I&#8217;m born and raised in sweden but I&#8217;ve gone to finnish schools (grades 1-9) and I&#8217;ve had the finnish language around me all the time so it has naturally always been my first language. One could think that Swedish should be fluent for me due to have lived here all my life, but it ain&#8217;t. I stutter quite a lot and I can&#8217;t make myself understood sometimes. That bothers me a lot! Maybe I should move over to finland?

I have never been drunk. I do drink though, but I choose not to put myself in situations where I cannot handle my acts. Sometimes people tell me that &#8220;C&#8217;moon! It ain&#8217;t that bad!&#8221;. That also bothers me. A no is a no! Please respect that.

Being a guy, people expect me to like cars&#8230; I dislike cars, I&#8217;m not interested at all! + here in Gothenburg you don&#8217;t really need cars. We have trams and buses that take you anywhere you want.

I&#8217;m terrible with answering/calling people on the phone.

I&#8217;m not comfortable with my own voice, I&#8217;m too silent. And whenever I speak louder, It feels like I&#8217;m yelling. Now also when my hearing got a bit fucked during the summer, I get really confused whether I&#8217;m speaking with my normal volume or if I&#8217;m screaming.

I have a trouble looking people in the eyes when having a discussion. Ok, not always, but it happens quite a lot that I look elsewhere when people talk to me.

I have never been in love with anyone.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

The future keeps on coming, blaring its horn, and I kind of want to step off the tracks.

My parents have (and continue to) work their asses off for my benefit, and I feel more and more like I haven't done shit to repay them.

I have been handed a million opportunities, but it's very hard for me to attach myself to one definite direction in life. Uncertainty is so comforting, in a way.

.

 

[Vincent J.]

I'm way more shy in person than probably any of you would ever expect. It's easy to fake it online.

I have things going for me that most people would probably kill for, but deep down I feel like I haven't accomplished anything significant with my life.

I tell people I have no secrets, but I do. I guess that makes me a liar as well.

I oftentimes feel very hypocritical when giving people advice, especially when it comes to issues of self-esteem.

Sometimes I go through life feeling like I live in the shadows of my friends. Sometimes it bothers me and sometimes it doesn't, but no matter what I'm well aware of the fact that it's all up to me to break those mental chains and stop. Sometimes I care about it and sometimes and I don't and it eats me up inside all the time because I still haven't done anything about it.

I don't live as healthy a life as I know I should. I try, but not hard enough and I know I could do better. I just don't.

I'm lonely.

I'm confused.

Sometimes I feel like my best years are still ahead of me but before I can let myself get too optimistic about it, I convince myself that my "heydays" are passing me by as I sit here typing on the internet thinking about garbage like this.

I don't know what typing this out is going to do but I don't care. It kind of sounds like a cry for attention, and maybe it is, but I still wouldn't care if no one even read it.

I feel like I'd deserve it if I got mugged on the way to my car after work tonight. My whole life up to this point feels faked, forced, and well.... wrong.

But the main feeling I've had that I've never told anyone before is that 100% of the time I feel forgettable. I know it's not true but I can't make myself think otherwise. I know that I can do anything I want with my life and it's all well within my physical and mental capabilities, but I just can't learn to like myself and that makes it hard for me to believe that others would. Talk about a vicious cycle.

Today is a weird one. I think this shit all the time but never say it or type it.

As soon as I click that little "submit new thread" button down there, I know I'm going to regret it.

*takes a deep breath*

Guess I have a lot of the same problems. Usually I knów I'm going in the right direction, but I still have those feelings that make me doubt a lot of things about myself quite often..
Anyway, you seem to be a really nice guy (though I know it only from the internet, but it's hard to fake that I guess) with talents (I only know photography, but those kind of talents overlap a lot of other stuff too), so you have the potential to greater things

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

I'm terrible at meeting new people and maintaining friends. I just get really insecure and obsessed with what people think of me, and as such I don't take any chances. It's incredibly rare that I initiate social encounters with others, because if they don't want to it'd get all weird and awkward. And since I rarely make friendships with people, it's rare that someone will initiate one with me. This is particularly true with women.
The most frustrating thing is that I recognize all of this, but for some reason lack the motivation to fix anything.

you're damn awesome, though.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

Fucking <3 you guys.

Right now I confess that I really, almost to the point of tears, miss Layne Staley and the real Alice in Chains.

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

also: it's weird to see just how insecure most of you guys actually are. i mean, this is just the internet but i think that's true of most people, or at least that's what i've found when i've actually been able to get close enough to people i know to talk about that kind of stuff. to me, seeing the insecurites of these people who i think are so together and self-assured is comforting, in a weird way but it's also depressing. do none of the genuinely good people in the world have faith in themselves?

 

[Vincent J.]

do none of the genuinely good people in the world have faith in themselves?

I think most of us are still relatively young, so maybe they need time to tell them how awesome they really are

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

i suppose. i guess it's all a matter of perspective.

 

[JenniferGentle]

Fucking <3 you guys.

Right now I confess that I really, almost to the point of tears, miss Layne Staley and the real Alice in Chains.

I always agree with you on this, I've had "I Stay Away" as my away message for days ::sniffs::

 

[dreaming neon darkspot]

<3 that song

 

[NicholasDWolfwood]

stormo should definitely analyze me.

 

[Shpongled]

do none of the genuinely good people in the world have faith in themselves?

Karen has a quote in her sig that kind of explains this. Something about wrong people being the loudest and the wise doubting themselves too often. She hasn't posted for a while so I can't remember exactly what it said.

edit: damnit I got curious... here it is:

"The whole problem with the world is that
fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves,
and wiser people so full of doubts."
(Bertrand Russell)

 

[El Stormo]

stormo should definitely analyze me.

I would if you had something to analyze. In your post in this thread, you basically keep stating that you have 1) no self esteem and 2) an asshole-ish demeanor. There's not so much I can say to that.

 

[Karmic]

I may have a speech impediment which shows up whenever speak with other languages other than mine (finnish.) I’m born and raised in sweden but I’ve gone to finnish schools (grades 1-9) and I’ve had the finnish language around me all the time so it has naturally always been my first language. One could think that Swedish should be fluent for me due to have lived here all my life, but it ain’t. I stutter quite a lot and I can’t make myself understood sometimes. That bothers me a lot! Maybe I should move over to finland?

I understood you perfectly well and I have a problem with hearing what people say sometimes

Being a guy, people expect me to like cars… I dislike cars, I’m not interested at all! + here in Gothenburg you don’t really need cars. We have trams and buses that take you anywhere you want.

I think it's more of the industry working people that have that mandatory interest for cars, it's pretty much only there I've encountered this "WHAT YOU DON'T LIKE CARS?????" thing.