I've noticed a lot of you newcomers (n00bs) as well as some people who've been here longer than me but showed clear signs of stupidity have chosen to step out of the closet and admit that you despite everything that makes sense actually like Are You Dead Yet? (no, but CoBollocks is) equally as much as or better than their old material (to which you all should be shot in the head until you die for and then some in the crotch just to be sure). Yes, there has been countless threads about this matter but there has also been countless more threads about how much "AYDY is betar than the 0ld stuf tbh!!1¼lolz" and thats just wrong so I'll do another contribution on the hate mail part in a probably failed attempt to help one of you useless fucks to see the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Q: "I think Alexi is fuckin' god!" -Stupid idiot
A: Heads up: No he isn't. He's fucking lame that's what he is. Back in the old days when everything was bliss and nobody cared about a pathetic wannabe with eyeliner or american 14year old fanboi attitudes, myself and a lot of other disappointed fans (or ex-fans,depends on how you see it i guess.. but then again your views on things don't count) proudly attended their gigs bought their albums, which once were great mind you, for the musical value (allthough I gotta admit their performance at Tuska in 2003 was so bad that I lost everything that was left of respect for them... ad then came AYDY). I even paid for a shirt for christ's sake! Now I can't possibly explain how bad I feel about the fact that I along with many other fans unaware of what to come financially supported this treacherous attention whore piece of shit band.
Q: "But Alexi stil shreddz!!1\"?\2!301!!!+i8 His solosa re sooo awesum!!" -Another stupid idiot
A: Who cares, his voice wasn't exceptionally good on any of their 3 first and decent albums and theres a lot of people who manage to play guitars in Finland and the rest of the world for that matter. If CoB changed lineup and attitude they would have been a much better band. Come to think of it, fuck CoB, listen to Kalmah instead.
Q: "Metalheads always think bands that make money turn untr00 so stfu k plz½?! Alexi is fucken god and CoB is fuckin' god too!!!!1one" -Joonas Lehtonen
A: Tit. Bands don't turn "untrue" unless they intend to by selling out and adjusting their music to the new [cough]Children of Bodom[/cough], which in this case means people who just bought the latest Linkin Park album and thought it was awesome. Need I mention Metallica? More money/fame and better production isnt equivalent with worse music, as long as your name isn't Alexi Laiho or Liaho or whatever the hell his name is. Take Windir for example. Yes it's another genre, but if you were un-stupid you'd get that.
"Popular music" (as in charts music) can be great, as long as they have something that makes them stick out. AYDY does not in any way perform this. If you have one of those machines that you insert a coin in and control that robotic arm to pick up stuff like candy or teddy bears, but instead of candy or teddy bears it's loaded with idiots and one smart and sexy chick in the middle, take out the chick and throw her in the trash, leaving it inhabited with only people like you guys, you might as well wrap it in a cd-cover, put some lame song names on the back label and write Are You Dead Yet on the front.
Q: "FFS!! withouwt progression they are gono fuckin' became boring anywhey! Alexi!!1 <3" -That one first stupid idiot again. Probably some stupid fanboi like Lanterns
A: Kalmah
Q: "Well if j00 hate them so muc y do yoo fuckin' post on this fuckin' bord?!?!!1eleven?" -Gûéñö.
A: Because I have every right to. There is a lot of great people here, where a lot means a few, especially compared to the wave of fucktards that has arrived after AYDY was leaked on the internet. And yes, I've also heard whinery from you miserable attempts at humanity who say you liked their old material first "but AYDY IS THAR BE5T!" and well you are a bunch of posers and there's probably nothing you can do about it except slit your wrists.
Feel free to add inputs to the FAQ folks, where folks mean those few already mentioned ones who are un-lame.
As for the rest of you schmucks, you stink!
